I Know Why The Sun Shines/4

Summary

The group finds a portal in a Kohl's department sotre. Nothing new on the villain from the end of episode 3, however.

Transcript

CHAOS: That other half has to be here somewhere!

TRACY:{ordering} I'll have a... mint cone... double-scoop.

CASHIER: Okay, would you like anything on that?

TRACY: Hmm... blood... and... Tortan.

CASHIER: I'm sorry, we're out of blood.

TRACY:{sighs, gets out a vile of blood, hands to cashier} Use this.

CASHIER: Okay. {gets out an ice cream cone, puts two scoops of mint ice cream, Tortan, and the blood on it, hands to Tracy} Here you go! That'll be $5!

TRACY: {takes ice cream, hands $5 to the cashier} Thank you. Hold on. {to group} You guys want anything? I'm buying!

{Sephiroth leaves the store, wearing an overcoat. It is stuffed full of Shopping.}

SHOPKEEPER: HEY! YOU DIDN'T PAY FOR THOSE!!!

{Sephiroth walks up to him, and raises his hand.}

SEPHIROTH: I did pay for those.

SHOPKEEPER: {Tranced} You did pay for those.

SEPHIROTH: You will give me some orange sherbert.

SHOPKEEPER: Here, have some Orange Sherbert. {Gives}

{Sephiroth Leaves. Vindicator walks in (XD Austin Powers references)}

VINDICATOR: {to shopkeeper} Where is Batman hiding?

SHOPKEEPER: I have no idea what you are talking about.

VINDICATOR: Where is Batman hiding?

SHOPKEEPER: I'll die before I tell you!

VINDICATOR: {grabs shopkeeper by the collar, demonic shout} WHERE IS BATMAN HIDING?

SHOPKEEPER: {remains fearless} The Batcave. Batman is in the Batcave.

VINDICATOR: Oh really?

SHOPKEEPER: Bite my arm. I still won't tell you.

VINDICATOR: Oh god.

{Vindicator rips the Shopkeeper in two. A replacement immediately pops up.}

VINDICATOR: Damn Kohl's respawn system.

TRACY: Here. {reaches behind cashier, pulls a cord of back of cashier's head}

{the Cashier/Shopkeeper slumps over}

TRACY: Happy now?

{Sephiroth walks in again, with a fake mustache. He steals even more items. He goes offscreen for 1 second, only to return, riding a Giant Tank Labeled "MR. SATAN INDRUSTRIES". He rides through the wall, breaking it.}

{Tommyspud warps in}

TOMMYSPUD: ... You guys are terrible. So, Chaos, I wonder where the other half page is?

SEPHIROTH: Who knows?

{A shopkeeper walks up to Sephiroth}

SHOPKEEPER: Have you tried the "Missing Pages" aisle?

TRACY: Thanks. {walks to the Missing Pages aisle, buys 50 packs, 2 mega-cases, the original manuscript to Macbeth, and 20 packs of Mighty Beanz} I'm glad they put these in stores again. {pays the shopkeeper, throws a series 1 pack to Bell} Here, dad!

BELL:{catches} THANKS! {immediately rips pack open} SUPAHW00T!!! A Mighty Moose! The Australian gold bottomed one!

TRACY: Man, you're lucky!

CHAOS: Oh, the piece is here in the "Obvious things nesecarry to finish up episodes of fanfics on the Homestar Runner Fanstuff Wiki and Wiki User Wiki of any timeline" aisle. {adds it into the book with the other half} I'm too Lazy to Read it right now.

{Daxter comes in, dressed in a black jacket, and sunglasses.}

DAXTER: Hey guys! I didn't know you were here! Hey Chaos, what's with that book you have? It barely has any pages!

CHAOS: ...Said the loser in the Fonz clothing. Now, to find a way out of here...

SEPHIROTH: The Door at the left. {Points at Door.} Outside is a nice Hot spring! {Cut to a large hot spring.}

SEPHIROTH: Yay! {Rips Clothes off, to reveal boxer shorts. Jumps into Spring.}

CHAOS: No. That seems too obvious. Hey! What about there? {points to a portal}

IM A BELL: I'm following Chaos. But, just in case, {summons up two clones} Clone 1! You search the hot springs for any pages! After that, you can have fun. Clone 2! You buy all the Mighty Beanz! {hands the second clone a million dollars} Now where's Tr-God...

{pan out to show Tracy in the hot spring}

TRACY: What?

IM A BELL: {grabs Tracy} Come on, idiot.

DAXTER: Oh come on! Relax! {Reaches up, and drags Bell by the leg, into the spring.}

IM A BELL:{vaporizes leg, gets out of spring, regenerates it, walks back to Chaos} Daxter, I sent a clone into the spring. Have fun with him.

TOMMYSPUD: I'm going with you guys.

CHAOS: 4 Out of 9 isn't so bad.

{Chaos jumps through the portal}

VINDICATOR: WAIT! I WANNA GO TO HOLLYWOOD!

{Tommyspud steps into the portal.}

IM A BELL: Anyone else coming? Ah well. {drags Tracy into the portal}

SEPHIROTH: Oh Well. {Grabs the Hot spring, rips it from the ground, and goes into the portal, still in the hot spring.}

{Everything goes black, and only voices can be heard.}

CHAOS: Where are we? Did we go to purgatory?

SEPHIROTH: Dunno. {Turns on Light. They are in a pirates cove. Treasure is everywhere.}

CHAOS: Hmm. I guess, we're in a pirate's cove. Ohh! Another portal! {runs into it}

SEPHIROTH: Alleyoopp! {Jumps into Portal.}

{Tommyspud quickly hops into the portal.}

{Cut to the other end of the portal, which happens to be right next to a video game shop. Another portal is near by. Everyone jumps out of the end of the portal. Vindicator appears first.}

VINDICATOR: Mentos: The Freshmake- crap.

{Vindicator is squished by the rest, who come out. He goes ethereal and stands up, going corporeal again.}

{Im a bell's clone jumps in the portal}

IM A BELL(NOT CLONE): Gotta go for a while. {morphs to "Present-Day" Bell} It's my HRFWikiversary, so, yeah. {voips away}

CHAOS: Whoa. Vindicator. Did you see another page of the book, or another portal?

{A Kirby walks by.}

MOOBLY: There's a portal right next to the portal you came out of, dim--DEMON! DEEEEEEEEEEEEEMON!!! {runs away}

IM A BELL:{warps back} Umm...'Kay. {jumps in portal}

CHAOS: Double Whipless moccachino half-calf!

{Chaos jumps into the portal, and it closes on his leg, which then gets into the portal. Another portal opens up.}

TOMMYSPUD: I'm not going to like this... {Jumps through the portal.}

{cut to Chaos and Bell inside a portal}

IM A BELL: Um, where's everybody else?

TOMMYSPUD:{distorted, offscreen, sounds far away} I'm not going to like {sounds even farther away} this...

IM A BELL: Well, great. We've been split up from everyone.

{Tracy fades in carrying millions of Mighty Beanz}

TRACY: I'm still here! And I gots the Mighty Beanz!

IM A BELL: Hoo-rah!

CHAOS: I think we're in purgatory...Again.

{Chaos finds a light switch and turns it on. Now, they're in a dentist's office.}

CHAOS: Hmm. Guess not. Again. I think Tommyspud may also be stuck in the intercom!

TOMMYSPUD:(From Intercom) Chaos, I hate portals so much... Wait... {The intercom explodes and Tommyspud reappears beside Chaos again} Ok, I'm back. I think someone is trying to screw with our minds, Chaos.

IM A BELL: Um, maybe it's genjutsu. {tries to stop energy}

{Klaxons sound. "GENJUTSU" appears on a wall}

IM A BELL: Er, maybe not. Maybe I can warp this place to my desires by gibberish and technobabble. Thouestnessitess, I wouldst believe I an will ate laptop. {a laptop appears on his hand} Good. I have a feeling that if I Google "Subliminal Messages OR Optical Illusions"... {does so} Er, I forgot how this would help.

(OOC:Everyone should check out Wizzle World, a new interactive game by me!)

CHAOS: Let's just find another portal.

IM A BELL: But first... {opens door}

{door reveals a mountain backdrop. Blocks and platforms appear. Everything turns CGI}

IM A BELL: I guess we know where we are... {gulps, steps out of door, falls} Ohh crap...

{a giant orange blast appears where Bell landed}

IM A BELL:{floats down onto a platform} What're you waiting for?

CHAOS: Doomsday. Or worse.

{Chaos shuts the Door, and locks it.}

CHAOS: We'll just try our luck with...this door!

{Chaos opens a door next to the one he locked, and runs into the room, which turns iut to be a portal.}

CHAOS: I told ya so! {echoes}

IM A BELL:{blasts into locked door} You aren't fun. I wanted to play Brawl.

{Chaos pops out of the portal, with the box from Episode 3. Except, it's unlocked, and empty.}

CHAOS: Probably a good time to tell you. There wasn't even anything in the box. It was a JOKE!

IM A BELL:{takes out REAL box} Nope. You're lying. The evil contained in the book is already starting to corrupt you, Chaos.

CHAOS: No, it isn't. I sealed the thing in that box. This stupid book could never corrupt me. Future Sephiroth lied. This is just a book.

{Future Sephiroth comes in.}

FUTURE SEPHIROTH: Just a book eh? Joke? ME LYING!? WELL TRY SAYING THAT TO YOUR FUTURE SELF, IF BY ANY CHANCE, YOU MEET HIM!!! {To Bell} Don't worry. Nobody can open the box, except for us 2. And we genuinely need to open the box, so, we can't open it for no reason. There's a secret in that box. Only I can trust you with it. {Leaves again.}

SEPHIROTH: Man, future me always leaves. {Heartless Spawner comes out of Sephiroth's arm. He then shoots the floor, and a Heartless comes up. A Keyblade comes out of Sephiroth's arm, and he kills the heartless.}

CHAOS: No, I made that box! I put the thing inside it! I can open it! Now, let's just all go through the portal!

{Everyone walks through the portal.It's black(again*sigh*)}

CHAOS: I think I know where we are. We're at....

THE END!

CHAOS: Aww...