(even if you aren't vegan)
GDDTV/Toons/Episode 1
Contents
About
Pete and Dan go on an epic adventure to get some lunch.
Cast: Dan, Pete, Bubs, Homsar, Paco the Taco, Alfonzo
Places: Dan's Apartment, Bubs Concession Stand, The Field
Date: January 2nd, 2009
Transcript
{Fade in to Dan on the couch watching TV. Pete comes in in his Call of Duty 4 pajamas, just waking up}
DAN: Hey Pete!
PETE: Food... {He walks sluggishly to the refridgerator}
DAN: Alrighty then...
PETE: Unggghhh... {He opens the door to the fridge, looks inside for a few seconds, then closes the door and turns to Dan} Get dressed. We're getting tacos.
DAN: What?! Dude, you were just a zombie! Now you want food?
PETE: I'm hungry, Peterson! I need food!
DAN: Alright, alright. Get dressed and I'll go get th-
PETE: I am dressed. Let's go. I'm driving.
DAN: You're in your Duty pants! {pauses} ...heh heh...duty...
PETE: I'm fine. Let's go. I'm driving.
DAN: What?! You can't drive! Listen I have a permit, so we'll go get Homestar. He's old enough to drive, right?
PETE: I can drive just fine. MOVE YOUR LAZY BUTT! {He darts for the door}
DAN: Okay! Okay! {Follows Pete out}
{Cut to Bubs Concession Stand. Pete and Dan drive up in Strong Intelligent's car}
DAN: {Getting out} Woah! When you're hungry, you drive like a psycho!
PETE: I WANT TACOS, DAMN IT! {He angrily walks up to the counter}
BUBS: Hey, Pete! What can I do you for?
PETE: {grabs Bubs by the throat} I. NEED. TACOS.
BUBS: Oh...well first can you let go?
DAN: Pete! {pulls Pete off} Sorry, Bubs. He gets like this when he's hungry.
BUBS: Crap, man! Well lemme see what I got in here... {He ducks behind the counter and is ruffling through boxes. He get up after a while and hands Pete a shoe}
PETE: What. Is. This?
BUBS: All I got left in the "Taco/ Imported Sneaker" box.
DAN: Who bought the last package of tacos?
BUBS: As the manager of this establishment, it would go against Bubs Concession Stand policy to reveal the name of the previous buyers of merchandise in order to protect- {Pete throws the shoe at his head} It was Homsar.
PETE: Crap. Let's go. {Gets in the car and starts it}
DAN: Wait! Sorry again Bubs. Pete! {Runs to the car and gets in}
{Cut to The Field. Pete and Dan pull up and get out}
PETE: Where does Homsar live anyway?
DAN: I dunno. Hey what's this boot doing here? Did I go fishing?
{There is a random boot on the ground in front of Dan. He picks it up and rubs the dirt off of it. It begins to shake and then explodes in his hands}
PETE: Dan! Stop messing around with footwear and let's find Homsar!
{As the smoke clears, Homsar is floating next to Dan}
HOMSAR: You that have collected the seven magic shooooooooooooooooooes... For this I will grant you one wish...
PETE: TACOS.
HOMSAR: I wish I wish I was a fiiiiish...
{Homsar explodes, and tacos rain down from the sky. The boot reappears and floats into the sky, splits into seven shoes, and scatters in different directions}
PETE: SWEET!! I finally got my tacos! {He picks up a taco}
TACO: Wait! Don't eat me!
PETE: {screams} OH MY GOD! A TALKING TACO!
TACO: I'm Paco the Taco. Nice to meet you!
DAN: Maybe it's the blow to my head due to a boot, but that taco is talking.
PACO: Nope. I'm really real. Just please don't eat me! I want to be friends.
PETE: Alright, fair enough, but I'm freaking hungry. {He puts Paco down and starts eating other tacos}
DAN: It won't offend you to eat some of these, will it?
PACO: Nah. None of them talk. They're boring.
DAN: Sweet! {Starts eating tacos}
{Cut to outside Dan's apartment building, Pete drives up. Dan, Pete, and Paco get out}
DAN: So, Paco... There's room in my place. You wanna live here?
PACO: That would be great! Sure!
PETE: Sweet. Let's go upstairs. Time for me to sleep.
PACO: But it's 1:07 pm!
PETE: Yeah, but I don't normally wake up till 2, so I need more sleep.
DAN: There's no use fighting it, Paco. It's been that way for 2 years.
{They open the front door and go in. Cut to Dan's Apartment. The trio walk in the front door. Alfonzo is in the kitchen area}
ALFONZO: Hey guys. Did you bring me a taco? I'm starved!
DAN: No! This is Paco. He is NOT FOR EATING!
ALFONZO: Now, Dan. What did I tell you about naming and personifying inanimate objects?
DAN: Listen. Tommy the Tomato was the nicest tomato I've ever talked to.
PACO: Oh please. Everybody knows that tomatos can't talk.
ALFONZO: Oh my God. You talked!
PACO: Yes I do that sometimes.
ALFONZO: Not gonna lie, that's pretty sweet.
DAN: Well, Paco. You can bunk in my room.
PACO: Sweet! I'll go make myself a little place to stay.
{Paco walks into Dan's room}
DAN: Well this was an interesting day! A new charcter in our toons! And it only took until 2009!
{"The End, Fools!" appears on the screen}
Easter Eggs
- Click "End":
{Cut to The Field. Homsar is floating there above the boot}
HOMSAR: Now that the wish has been maaaaaaaaade, the Earth will sooooooooon explooooode...
{Slow close-up on Homsar's mindless expression with dramatic music}
{Cut back to the end of the toon}
Fun Facts
- Pete really does sleep till unnatural hours.
- Homsar's role in this toon was a parody of the DragonBall Z series. When the shoes scattered, it was like the DragonBalls scattering after the wish.
- "NOT FOR EATING" is from Bonus Stage Episode 31.
- Paco the Taco was actually the title of a song I was writing. No. Seriously. I'm not kidding.
- All Homestar Runner charcters are copyright to the Brothers Chaps.
- Strong Intelligent is copyright to himself.
- The title of the toon is a parody of the Bowling For Soup album "The Great Burito Extortion Case."