(even if you aren't vegan)
Fanny Ticklers!!!!
{The year is 1476. The United States of America is under heavy fire for its controversial "Time Travel" invention. In the small city of New York City lives a man named Rusty Tickler. This is his story.}
{Cut to a bigshot's office in a skyscraper. Rusty Tickler is pitching his next big invention, "Time Travel but Better". The bigwig looks displeased.}
RUSTY: You see, bigwig, the Time Travel but Better has a much more ergonomic design as well as UNLIMITED TIME TRAVEL. What is there to lose? Much more than MacDonald's ratty machine!
BIGWIG: Demonstrate it for me.
{Rusty lays out a line of coke on the table and snorts it. Tempted, the bigwig snorts some, because this is the 1470s and thats what bigwigs do.}
RUSTY: Hop
RUSTY: The fuck
RUSTY: In
{Montage of time travel. Rusty and the bigwig crash their vehicle and are sent to the hospital.}
BIGWIG: Shit
FANNY: Brother are you ok??
BIGWIG: Tickler wtf
FANNY: It's me. Fanny Tickler.
BIGWIG: But weren't you Rusty
{The curtain pulls back. The nurse is fanny tickler. The doctor is Fanny Tickler. Bigwig's son is fanny tickler.}
FANNY: We're the fanny ticklers
{curtain swings closed}