Fake Character Email Funstar Player/fsew

Summary

An Earth Day special for people that actually care!

Cast (in order of appearance): Funstar Player, Homestar Runner, Strong Bad

Places: The Field, Homestar Runner's House

Date: April 22, 2008

Transcript

{Music begins and text fades in from The Field: "And now an important safety announcement". Funstar walks in.}

FUNSTAR: Hi, guys, and welcome to Funstar Earthways. I'm your host here, telling you how to protect the Earth from dangers to come.

{Cut to Homestar's kitchen. Homestar leaves with the light still on and the sink still running.}

FUNSTAR: Don't take the example of this idiot. He's pretty much asking for millions of plants and animals to to die out each minute. You see, the world is a very complex thing.

{Cut to a chart of the earth. Funstar is next to it with a pointer and marker.}

FUNSTAR: It needs water and light for itself. {points to the blue part and the yellow part above the earth} That doesn't mean it's selfish, it needs the water and light to survive. {draws sunglasses and a cup of water on the earth} Nope, not selfish at all.

{Cut back to Homestar's kitchen. Homestar turns off the sink and light before leaving.}

FUNSTAR: That's better.

{Then, a thump is heard offscreen.}

FUNSTAR: You forgot to turn on the lights in the next room, didn't you?

HOMESTAR: Yes, Mr. Earthlover.

{Cut to a trash can.}

FUNSTAR: This would be a great place to put my aluminum, glass, paper, plastic, steel, electronics, and other crud, wouldn't it be?

{A big "NO WAI!" appears on the screen.}

FUNSTAR: Of course not, didn't you forget the 4 Rs? Reduce, reuse, recycle, and run(you don't really have to run, that's just extra)! Because, all that stuff goes somewhere doesn't it? Yeah, and you don't want to know where. Anyway, you don't need to put all your stinking trash there, it'd be better if you didn't.

{Cut to the back of a garbage truck.}

FUNSTAR: Because a big monster eats that junk up and spits it into a dirty, polluting place. People like to call it a DUMP because it's where you dump those things.

{Cut to a lake.}

FUNSTAR: But it's better to put your things in a trash than in a body of water, because the things pollute the water and pollutions cause normal sea animals to mutate into monsters that attack you in your sleep.

{A silhouette of a monster with fins and a tail walks out of the water.}

{Cut to the Field.}

FUNSTAR: And look at all this around me. In a few years, it may look like this.

{The Field turns brown and and the sky turns pale.}

FUNSTAR: Looks ugly, doesn't it? Do you want to be the cause of this.

{A big "NUH-UH!" appears onscreen.}

FUNSTAR: Do you want this to happen?

{A big "YOU SHOULDN'T!" appears onscreen.}

FUNSTAR: So, save the world, and yourself! Funstar Player, out!

{Strong Bad runs onscreen and looks around.}

STRONG BAD: Hey, what happened to this place? It was green a minute ago.

{The polluted Field, which is revealed to be on cardboard, falls down and the real Field is seen again.}

FUNSTAR: {sighs} That's all, kids.

{The envelope comes down and the paper with the words "New email next week! But not this one, due to Earth Day" pops out.}

Fun Facts

• The title is a reference to Strong Bad Gameways.

Fun Facts

• This is an Earth Day reference to Strong Bad Gameways