(even if you aren't vegan)
Fake Character Email Funstar Player/3 course meal
Contents
Summary
Funstar tells you about his dream course meal.
Cast (in order of appearance): Funstar Player, Homestar Runner, Strong Bad
Places: Funstar Player's Computer Room, Marshmallow's Last Stand
Date: April 10, 2008
Transcript
FUNSTAR: {singing} Emails are fun, emails are great, emails are what you shouldn't hate.
Subject:sportsSup F*P,
Strong Intelligent
What is your dream 3 course meal?
The one and only-
{reads "The one and only-" as "The one and only inappropriate minus sign"}
FUNSTAR: Dear S*I, why must you abuse the subject bar and greeting option? Why not just make your own? It's not that hard. Anyway, my dream 3 course meal isn't actually a three course meal. The only restaurant I go to is so small, it only serves one course meals and two course meals, so this email needs some fixing up.
{Funstar backspaces the words "3 course" so it says meal.}
FUNSTAR: Ah, that's better. Now, my dream 3 course meal, I mean, normal meal, would be-
{Cut to a black screen. It says the following words.}
WARNING!
This following scene contains mouthwatering deliciousnesses that can only be seen in some dumb animal's imagination. Viewer discretion advised.
{Cut to Marshmallow's Last Stand in a pink border. Funstar is waiting.}
FUNSTAR: They were right. Good food does take a long time to wait for. Oh well. {starts stacking toothpicks}
{Homestar Runner in a waiter's outfit suddenly walks onscreen angrily.}
HOMESTAR: What do you think you're doing?
FUNSTAR: Waiting for you to get off your lazy butt and serve me. {stacks another toothpick}
HOMESTAR: {takes the toothpicks from Funstar} These are toothpicks, not stacksticks! So stop it!
FUNSTAR: Will you just give me my dream course meal?
HOMESTAR: Fine, here you go. {gives Funstar a metal box}
FUNSTAR: Cool! What's in it?
HOMESTAR: Open it to find out. Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to sleep-I mean work-in the kitchen.
{Homestar walks offscreen and Funstar opens the box, a bright glow coming out.}
FUNSTAR: Whoa, now that's a meal.
{Cut back to the computer room.}
FUNSTAR: So, there, that's my three course meal. Come down, envelope! {nothing happens} What? Oh, the viewers didn't see what was in the box! My bad. {laughs, then frowns, seeming annoyed} Yeah, let's get on with this.
{Cut back to Marshmallow's Last Stand. Funstar takes things out of the box.}
FUNSTAR: {offscreen} First, there would be my oh-so-good turkey-ham. What is that, you say? {takes out a turkey that is shaped and cut like ham} Next, there would be some bread, cut by the hands of professional martial artists and slabbed on it would be the perfect amount of butter. {takes out bread with butter on it} And then there would be coffee with a pinch of cinnamon and sugar. {take out coffee}
{Cut back to the computer room.}
FUNSTAR: Good, huh? Just wait until you hear about the dessert.
STRONG BAD: {offscreen} What?
FUNSTAR: Strong Bad? What are you doing here?
STRONG BAD: Oh, I just came to hack into your computer, but you're still here, so I'll just tell you what I think of the way you answered.
FUNSTAR: I don't care about your opinion, Wrong Bad!
STRONG BAD: Don't make fun of my family name, or I'll show you why they call us that.
FUNSTAR: Whatever, just tell me what you think of the way I answered the email so I can kick you out faster.
STRONG BAD: It stinks. Throw it away.
FUNSTAR: That's it. Go away.
STRONG BAD: No, seriously. Turkey-ham? Bread with butter? Cinnamon and sugar in coffee? You need help from a professional.
FUNSTAR: {reluctantly} Fine, masked checker of emails. Tell me how to answer this email correctly.
STRONG BAD: Tell you? How about I show you?
{Strong Bad jumps on the chair, knocking Funstar off, and reads the email.}
Subject:sportsSup F*P,
Strong Intelligent
What is your dream 3 course meal?
The one and only-
STRONG BAD: Strong Intelligent? More like Strong Unintelligent! You make fun of the Strong name, what with your completely unrelated subject bar and your minus sign after "the one and only", which doesn't really need to be there! So, to get rid of anymore discussion, this email is
DELETED!
STRONG BAD: There! That's the way to treat this email.
FUNSTAR: {rubbing his head} Great, now give me back my chair.
STRONG BAD: {gets up} OK, but remember what I told you. {leaves}
FUNSTAR: {sits down} So, there you go, inappropriate minus sign, my dream course meal.
{The envelope comes down with the paper saying "Click here to email Funstar" popping out.}
FUNSTAR: {grumbling} How come the computer showed his reflection?
STRONG BAD: {offscreen} Because I'm cooler.
FUNSTAR: Stay outta this, you.
| > Click here to e-mail Funstar Player |
| funplay12@jcmail.com |
Easter Eggs
- Click on the words "inappropriate minus sign" to see another scene at Marshmallow's Last Stand.
- {A large minus sign with arms and legs sits at table. Homestar walks onscreen.}
- HOMESTAR: Hello, Strong Intelligent, I hope you find this place to your liking.
