Con email.exe/77

Summary

Death and Anti-??? is planning a final assault. Cruroar has other plans...

Cast in order of appearance:

Page Title: Email 77 AKA Final Attack AKA I don't care

Transcript

CONCHRIS: I'm glad that's over. Now let's see...

Dear Conchris,
If it's OK, can I meet you in the demonic
ally down the page, I have important news.
Death is desperate, he's joining 
forces with Anti-??? for a final attack on
us. Meet me in the ally for more info.
Strong Sader

CONCHRIS: Okay, I will!

{Cut to a time card which says "Many moments later"}

{Cut to a dark ally, the walls are non-descript, the side of the wall was spray-painted with "N**** STOLE MY COW!"}

CONCHRIS: What the?

{Conchris walks up to remove it, it disappears and the edit floats up into the sky, into "history"}

CONCHRIS: I'm glad that was removed.

{A shadowy figure emerges from the wall}

CONCHRIS: EEP! Who are you?

SHADOWY FIGURE: Are you seeking for some info on Death and Anti-Something?

CONCHRIS: Erm... Yes... Umm...

{Cut to another time card, it says 5 minutes later}

CONCHRIS: Oh, so that's why they teamed up!

SHADOWY FIGURE: Yes, now go before they do any damage!

{Conchris starts running away from the figure, cut to Cruroar's ship}

CRUROAR: That stupid moron... I'll destroy him in the best way possible!

{Cruroar picks up a Laser Gun, he fires it at a piece of paper, as it is blasted, it disintergrates}

CRUROAR: MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HA HA HA!

{Gilbert walks on-screen}

GILBERT: Meh menna meh? (Why are you evil?)

{Cruroar zaps Gilbert with the laser}

CRUROAR: HA HA HA!

{Camera cuts to Gilbert, who is now a piece of ash lying on the ground with eyes}

GILBERT: Meh meh mneh meh... (At least I'll come back next email...)

{Cut to a place, it looks like a street, Conchris is walking along}

CONCHRIS: What did he mean?

VOICE: Your doom, perhaps?

CONCHRIS: DOOM?!

{Judge Pwnzor, Anti-??? and Death comes out of the shadows}

CONCHRIS: Wait... Judge Pwnzor? What are doing here?

JUDGE PWNZOR: OH MY GOSHZORS! IS THAT A COOKAY?!

CONCHRIS: No.

JUDGE PWNZOR: I HADE ENOFF! I NED SOME COOKAYS!

{Judge Pwnzor runs off, screaming about cookies, Conchris makes a confused expression}

DEATH: Why did you hire him?

ANTI-???: Umm... I didn't hire him, he forced me at banana-point to hire him.

CONCHRIS: {looking very confused} What?

ANTI-???: Let's fight then...

CRUROAR: {offscreen} STOP!

CONCHRIS: Huh?

{Camera cuts to Cruroar, whom is holding the ray from earlier}

CRUROAR: This guy is mine to kill. You stay out this!

ANTI-???: More like, YOU STAY OUT OF THIS!

CRUROAR: NO...YOU!

ANTI-???: NO YOU!

CRUROAR: NO YOU!

{Constant arguing is heard in the background, cut to Conchris, who is looking very confused}

CONCHRIS: I think all of my brain cells melted...

{Camera pans to Death, who is also wearing a confused expression}

DEATH: What you say?

CONCHRIS: Forget this. I'll save the fight for email 80!

{Conchris walks off, Camera cuts to Conchris with Death behind him}

DEATH: WAIT! Don't go! Please!

{Cut to the User Page}

CONCHRIS: And that's how everything turned out fine.

{Camera pan over to Homestar, who is wearing a tired expression}

HOMESTAR: Ugh...Conchris....That...Story...Was....Stupid...

CONCHRIS: NO IT'S NOT!

HOMESTAR: Then...why....did....you.... {head slams on the table, snoring is heard}

CONCHRIS: Well that sucks...

{Cut to a typical credits ending}

{The paper comes down, with the words "Click here to email Conchris, 20X6!"}

Author's Comment

3/5 - Eh... I made better.

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