Barry Bird Emails/bbemail 7

summary: The lost episode features Barry Bird in his self-righteous suicide. Contains horror elements not suited for +13. Viewer discretion is STRONGLY advised. You have been warned.

CAST: Barry Bird, Really Reilly, Announcer, Hayley Smith

Scene: Computer Room

Page Title: Compyman

Date: November 7, 2015

Transcript

BARRY BIRD: {typing "barrybirdemails.exe" while singing} Check emails! Check emails inside! I can't emails! Check emails inside! Save me! Send me stuff and save me from the dark!

Subject: Hello

How's it goin' Barry,

I'm a hippie, and I'm interested to hear
about your thoughts on the upcoming Woodstock
concert coming up next year.

Thanks,
Joel

BARRY: Okay, first problem, your name doesn't sound {ahem} groovy {pause} as a hippie name. Shouldn't it be Joey? {replaces Joel's L with a Y} And what the hell is up with "thanks?" What ever happened to {replaces "thanks" with} peace, or {replaces "peace" with} recycle, or {replaces "recycle" with} how ba-a-a-ad can I be? Heh, you call yourself a hippie? Let me just say, FUCK HIPPIES! THEY DESERVE TO-

{scene cuts to the words saying, "CENSORED BY THE FCC, MUTHAFUCKAZ!"}

Easter Egg

• At the end, click on "MUTHAFUCKAZ" to see an extra scene.

Transcript

{scene cuts to a press conference with Barry Bird and Really Reilly}

ANNOUNCER: Mr. Barry Bird. Can you explain how your episode was so offensive that it drove America to tears.

BARRY: {breathes, then pauses for 2 seconds} Hang on.

REALLY REILLY: {whispers to Barry's ear}

BARRY: Um... {clears throat} U fockin' wot m8?

{crowd gasps}

ANNOUNCER: Well I don't believe it. Tweets have been buzzing on this response to the most tragic email of the year!

HAYLEY SMITH: {offscreen} Even I'm shocked to hear that shit!

{the paper comes down}

Click here to Email Barry Bird

at [email protected]

Fun Facts

• This could be a direct ripoff of the lost Strong Bad Email.
• The intro song is a parody of Bring Me to Life by Evanescence
• Woodstock is a concert and gathering for the hippie demographic.
  • There is no Woodstock concert in 2016. I mean, we all know how Woodstock '99 happened, amirite?
• How Bad Can I Be is one of the musical numbers used in the 2012 animated film adaptation of The Lorax.
• Hayley Smith is a 19-year-old liberal hippie daughter of Stan in the TV show, American Dad!.
  • She's also my waifu. No joke!