Difference between revisions of "RiffText/Green Grass and High Tides Forever!/5"

Latest revision as of 14:56, 18 December 2013

If you need instructions on how to get through the grass, check out the enclosed

GREEN GRASS AND HIGH TIDES FOREVER

{Cut to Emerl and Gemerl, both wearing bathing suits and holding towels.}

EMERL: BEACHBEACHBEACHBEACHBEACHBEACHBEACHBEAHCHBEACHBEACHBEACHIWANNGOTOTHEBEACH.

LIGHTNING GUY: I wonder where they're going in this episode.

GEMERL: Hold your horses! We need to wait for everyone else.

EMERL: Why?

LIGHTNING GUY: I agree with this. Why? Aren't two idiots on a beach good enough?

{Dalek comes in.}

DALEK: By the way, I brought some friends.

{R2-D2, and C-P30 come in.}

LIGHTNING GUY: NO

C-P30: Oh my Oh Dear. Greetings. I am C-P30.

GEMERL: That's fine. Hear from anybody else before you got here?

{Jeran runs in with no armor, a bathing suit, and a towel}

LIGHTNING GUY: NOOO

JERAN: BEEEEEEEEAAAAACH TIEEEEM!

GEMERL: Well, nice to see Emerl isn't the only one with enthusiasm.

LIGHTNING GUY: There is nothing nice about about this at all.

R2-D2: BEEP BOP BEEP!!! {Flies into the deep water, so he can't be seen. A Camera comes out of the water.}

GEMERL: Your friend just jumped into a tub.

LIGHTNING GUY: "And should be dead because he's a robot, but we'll never mention that."

C-P30: I know. He's excitable.

JERAN: Hey, Gemerl! Let's go build a sand replica of my homeland!

{R2-D2 Comes out, and projects a mini hologram of Meridell, along with a hologram of King Skarl.}

LIGHTNING GUY: I DON'T KNOW WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE

C-P30: Oh my. It's your homeland.

JERAN: Hold up, R2. Hold that hologram for a sec...and DONE!

{Jeran finishes a sand sculpture of King Skarl}

LIGHTNING GUY: despite them not being at the beach yet

JERAN: What a beauty. {kicks it, destroying it} WHEE!

GEMERL: We aren't at the beach yet!

LIGHTNING GUY: Jeran made those sand sculptures with his mind.

{Everything stops, and the background turns into the Beach.}

LIGHTNING GUY: What a magnificent display of lazy writing!

GEMERL: Oh. Now, how about that sand castle?

C-P30: I would gladly make a sandcastle.

JERAN: SURF TIME! WOOHOO! {runs into the ocean with a surfboard}

LIGHTNING GUY: When did he have a surfboard? Oh wait, I forgot, He can make things with his mind.

R2-D2: Beep Bop Beep. Whoa!!!! {Opens hatch, and many tools pop out. He then speeds around, and a cloud of sand surrounds him. When it clears, a big Sand Replica of Yoda is made.}

JERAN: WHEE! {Jeran slides in on the shore}

LIGHTNING GUY: That was the shortest surfing trip ever.

{Chaos walks by everyone. He's dressed normally.}

CHAOS: Oh. Hey, guys! Anyone going to sign up for the surf contest? I'm a ref.

GEMERL: Surf contest? Dalek, why don't you and R2 compete in the surf contest?

LIGHTNING GUY: Because they're robots and would die.

I'm sure when The others come along, they'll join it.

DALEK: We don't have legs though. :(

LIGHTNING GUY: "And we're robots and would die. :((("

GEMERL: So? I don't think that's a factor. But R2 has legs. Just...small ones.

{R2-D2 Floats up, to reveal his "legs".}

LIGHTNING GUY: The Star Wars junkie in me is having a seizure.

DALEK: Meh. I suppose. ....TO THE SURF COMP!!!

{Jeran finishes sculpting a sand sculpture of Gutsman}

JERAN: DAHNAHHHHHHHHHHH!!! {points to Gutsman's buttocks}

LIGHTNING GUY: I...don't know how to react to that.

IORI:

LIGHTNING GUY: NO

{falls down from the top of the screen and lands on the sand sculpture of Gutsman} I'm never going to fly in a hot air balloon again. Did I just fall on a sand sculpture?

GEMERL: Not an important one.

IORI: Aight.

JERAN: YOU DESTROYED GUTSMAN'S ASS!

LIGHTNING GUY: Gutsman's Ass was obviously the best character.

{A random bird fires a giant laser at Jeran.}'

EMERL: Puppy said a swear!

LIGHTNING GUY: No, he didn't. He was obviously referring to Gutsman's donkey.

IORI: MY EARS!!!!

GEMERL: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU, IDIOT!?!?!

LIGHTNING GUY: !?!?!?!?!

{Emerl begins to hit Jeran on the head with a shovel.}

JERAN: Um...they changed that rule a while ago. That's why the writers of Aruseus Emails allow Wolf to say "damn."

EMERL: Not that! You said "Gutsman." Gutsman is a terrible swear.

LIGHTNING GUY: What a pitiful attempt to look less like an ass,
LIGHTNING GUY: And no, I don't mean "ass" as in donkey.

IORI: Gutsman? Ew. Sounds gory.

EMERL: Wait. I said it too. AAAAAAHHH! CLEANSE THE HATE! CLEANSE THE HATE!

{Emerl runs into the water and gets electrocuted.}

LIGHTNING GUY: Thank God.

EMERL: OK, I'm better now.

LIGHTNING GUY: NOOO

JERAN: Gutsman is a boss in Megaman 1, and later games. He's called Gutsman because he's got guts and muscle and stuff!

LIGHTNING GUY: And stuff!

EMERL: CLEANSE THE HATE! {Emerl picks up Jeran and runs into the water with him. The two get electrocuted.}

EMERL: Did it work?

PATRICK: {enters} Whatcha guys doin'?

LIGHTNING GUY: You've been on this show long enough to know that they never do anything.

JERAN: {dazed} Airman's weakness is the Item-2. Beat him and you get the Leaf Shield.

PATRICK: Megaman? Nah, not interested.

EMERL: Jeran sweared.

LIGHTNING GUY: Which is totally a word.

PATRICK: Jeran, shame on you. What word did he use?

IORI: Either "Gutsman" or- {intterupted}

LIGHTNING GUY: "{intterupted}"? How dare he!

PATRICK: Gutsman? A Megaman character? I take back the "shame on you", Jeran.

EMERL: CLEANSE THE HATE!!!!!!!!!!

LIGHTNING GUY: BURN IN A FIRE!!!!!!!!!!

{Emerl shoots a net device from his hand, captures Iori, Patrick, and Jeran, and runs into the water, electrocuting all 4 people.}

EMERL: Stop swearing!

LIGHTNING GUY: Electrocuting people is a great way to get this point across.

PATRICK: Wow, he must be that bad of a character, eh?

KANO: {teleports in} GUTSMAN GUTSMAN GUTTY GUTTY GUTSMAN!!!!!

LIGHTNING GUY: Speaking of bad characters...

JERAN: {holds up a picture of Gutsman} Emerl, who's this?

EMERL: {While electrocuting Kano} I dunno. Bad?

KANO: {uppercuts Emerl} Gotcha!

GEMERL: We're here to have fun, not to swear and fight. Leave that for Fight Club.

LIGHTNING GUY: I bet you've never even see Fight Club.

EMERL: The first rule about Fight is that you don't allow Emerl into FIght Club.

LIGHTNING GUY: RIght.

CARTOON LUIGI: Hey guys!

GEMERL: Not now, loser.

LIGHTNING GUY: We have now established that the character "Gemerl" is a big fat bully.

EMERL: So, can we make a sand castle?

IORI: Lets make a life size one!

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm sure that lets do.

KANO: {snaps his fingers and a life size sand castle appears} Done!

EMERL: That's not what I meant! {tears the castle down} Me, Jeran, and Gemerl were going to re-build Meridell. Why don't youi 3 enter the surf competition?

LIGHTNING GUY: Because Youi 3 has something better to do.

PATRICK: Nah, I'm terrible with balance. Iori and Kano can enter though.

EMERL: OK. Wanna help build Sand-Meridell, Patrick?

PATRICK: Sure.

IORI: Surfin' time!

KANO: Excelent!

LIGHTNING GUY: {singing to the tune of The First Noel} Two l's, two l's, "excellent" has two l's. If you don't want my hate, you should learn how to spell.

{Iori and Kano run off, and everyone else begins to build a sand castle. Cut to the surf contest.}

CHAOS: Everyone, gather around! I am Judge Chaos. You will be judged on a scale from 1 to 10, based off of your performance on the contest. The contest starts in 15 Minutes.

IORI: Since when is he the judge?!?!

LIGHTNING GUY: Since the beginning of this episode.

CHAOS: They sent me the application last week. What? Are you afraid I'll give you bad scores?

KANO AND IORI: Yes!

CHAOS: Well, I won't.

LIGHTNING GUY: He won't give Kano and Iori bad scores. They'll earn the bad scores.

IORI: Good.

CHAOS: So, you two go grab some boards.

IORI: Aight. {Kano and Iori go get some surfing boards. Cut back to the other guys and the sand castle}

EMERL: Well, we've finished Illusen's Glade, Half of Meridell Castle, Darigan, the petpet shop,

LIGHTNING GUY: the whatwhat what

Turmaculus, and 17 trees.

PATRICK: And in less than 10 minutes too. {notices Shao Kahn walking by} Hey Shao, want to help us with this sand castle?

LIGHTNING GUY: please say no please say no

SHAO KAHN: Sure, I don't have to much to do at this beach anyway.

LIGHTNING GUY: dammit

R2-D2: Beep bop beep!

DALEK: Whoa! Watch your language R2! But yeah.. We're ready!

EMERL: Did he say what I think he just said?

LIGHTNING GUY: If you think he just said "beep bop beep", then yes.

JERAN: What, is Cutman a swear now?

EMERL: Nope.

GEMERL: Jeran, do you happen to know where the sifter and shovel went?

LIGHTNING GUY: No, but he can make them with his mind.

JERAN: Here! {pulls sifter and shovel out of hammerspace}

LIGHTNING GUY: NO HE USED HIS MIND

Hm...Gutsman's ass, versus Weegee, versus Malleo, versus Mr. Hedgehog...who'd win?

EMERL: I've got the portable stinger ready. {electrocutes Jeran} Cleanse the Hate.

LIGHTNING GUY: What's with Emerl and reusing unfunny jokes over and over until they're even less funny? First FOURTH WALL BREAKAGE, and now this. He's on a roll with the crappy running gags.

PATRICK: Who'd win? Easy. Scorpion.

JERAN: Objection. And Emerl, if you shock me one more time, I'll thrust my sword through you and perform Ike's Aether with the sword still through you.

JERAN: OK! After that 509, we're back!

LIGHTNING GUY: Did he just do two lines in a row? DID HE JUST DO TWO LINES IN A ROW?

DALEK: {Comes in crying.} ALRIGHT! WHO DID THIS? {Holds up a piece of paper with a giant censor sign on it. Everyone looks disgusted at it.}

LIGHTNING GUY: What's so disgusting about a censor sign?

C-3P0: Oh my! If I could, I would throw up.

DALEK: Who drew this though? IT'S DISGUSTING!

JERAN: Gimme that. {Jeran takes the paper and rips it up looking away from it}

LIGHTNING GUY: Commas are your friend.

DALEK: Thank you. That picture was a crime against nature.

EMERL: It was a Well?

LIGHTNING GUY: Is Emerl JCM in disguise?
JCM: I heard that!

DALEK: Disgusting stuff.

EMERL: 2 Wells?

LIGHTNING GUY: I think we've already established that it's a censor sign,

DALEK: I'm not gonna say it, because you're gonna google it, and then get me sued.

EMERL: You can tell me. What could I sue you for?

DALEK: {Whispers to Emerl.}

LIGHTNING GUY: {Rolls his eyes at Dalek.}

EMERL: That's not that bad. It's just part of the circle of life.

LIGHTNING GUY: Hakuna matata.

PATRICK: What did he say?

EMERL: {Whispering to patrick} I have no frickin' idea.

PATRICK: Ah yes. I guess the world will never know.

LIGHTNING GUY: Nor will the world ever care.

GEMERL: You may want to go back to the Surf Contest. It's starting without you.

PATRICK: ...I didn't enter the surf contest.

GEMERL: Then you die.

LIGHTNING GUY: Surf contests are serious business.

{Gemerl sends a huge sword through Patrick. He dies and comes back as a ghost.}

EMERL: You're going to Hell for that.

LIGHTNING GUY: Now I know he's JCM is disguise!
JCM: Why are you acting like that would be a bad thing?

GEMERL: I figured.

JERAN: Wrong. He'll go to Robot Hell, where Heatman and Beelzebot are.

EMERL: And Tommy Chong?

LIGHTNING GUY: HA HA HA IT'S A POP CULTURE REFERENCE LOOK AT US WE'RE HIP

JCM: It's a Weird Al reference. You'd know that if you listened to good music. In fact, I think you're treating this Emerl character too harshly in general. He doesn't seem too bad.
LIGHTNING GUY: Where did you come from, anyway?
JCM: You left the window unlocked.

LIGHTNING GUY: I knew I was forgetting something!

{Silence.}

EMERL: Right.

GEMERL: OK, Now you're just blowing that out of proportion. He'll be back next episode.

EMERL: I feel it is my utmost pride to say {bashes Gemerl over the head with a hammer reading "Breakage"} {FOURTH WALL BREAKAGE TO DA MAX!!!}

JCM: Okay, never mind. He is an awful character, despite his wonderful taste in music.

LIGHTNING GUY: Told you.
JCM: And he isn't me in disguise!

LIGHTNING GUY: Sure he isn't.

PATRICK: {reforms as his original human form} WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?!?!?

JCM: ?!?!?!?!?
LIGHTNING GUY: Now you ruined it.

GEMERL: Or he could do it now and stop a potential continuity error.

PATRICK: If you do that again, I'm going to fire you. I swear!

LIGHTNING GUY: I thought swearing was wrong.

JCM: Swearing is wrong!

LIGHTNING GUY: Of course it is.

GEMERL: I'm not employed to you!

PATRICK: I mean from this series!

{Emerl attatches

LIGHTNING GUY: Rat a tat tatches.

dynamite to Jeran, and holds his finger dangerously close to the button.}

EMERL:{FOURTH WALL BREAKAGE!!!}

JCM: Does he realize how terribly annoying that is?
LIGHTNING GUY: Nope. I'm pretty sure he's living in how own little fantasy world by now.

{Gemerl disconnects the bombs and removes them form Jeran.}

JCM: Form Jeran sounds like a pretty weird way to remove something.

LIGHTNING GUY: Hey, that riff actually wasn't half-bad.

JCM: Yeah...that was totally a riff.

GEMERL: Whoa there, Nelly. Not too comedic now.

JERAN: EMERL! JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE IS GOING TO GET REMOVED FROM THIS FLASH SERIES BY PATRICK, CHAOS, AND RYAN DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO BLOW ME TO BITS!

EMERL: But it they

LIGHTNING GUY: it they we you

were going to remove you it would be a fine way to go out, don't you agree?

PATRICK: Gemerl isn't going to get removed from this series. ...As long as he doesn't kill anybody again.

LIGHTNING GUY: Well, there went his chances of not getting removed from this series.

And this isn't a flash series.

{Cut to Emerl attempting to hide filming equipment and a laptop with Flash on it.}

EMERL: Well, not yet. heh heh heh heh...

JCM: Well, uh, that's uh, what's the word?

LIGHTNING GUY: Creepy?

JCM: Yeah, that!

PATRICK: Let's get back to the sand castle!

EMERL: Agreed.

{Cut to the Surf Contest.}

CHAOS: OK, folks. Me, this sponge, and a box of Kit-Kats are ready to begin the contest!

JCM: I'm rooting for the Kit-Kats.

You have to stay on the waves the longest! Last one remaining is dubbed king of surf!

GIRL: Or queen?

CHAOS: Yeah, Queen was a good band.

<blcokquote>LIGHTNING GUY: HA HA IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE HE MISINTERPRETED WHAT THE GIRL SAID</blockquote>

GIRL: Oh, you men are all the same!

KANO: {shoots the girl with lightning}

JCM: What a meanie!
LIGHTNING GUY: {shoots JCM with lightning}

CHAOS: DUDE! That was the Kit-Kat boxes' girlfriend.

{Cut to the Kit-Kat box. It sheds a single tear. Cut back.}

LIGHTNING GUY: It's sad because it knows that it will never find another girl desperate enough to screw a Kit-Kat box.

CHAOS: Whatever. Ready...GO!

{Everyone rushes into the water.}

IORI: Wait, can I swim or not?

LIGHTNING GUY: I hope you can't swim and you drown.

CHAOS: Find out for yourself!

IORI: Fiiiine.

KANO: I'm-a gonna win!

LIGHTNING GUY: Please don't win. Please don't win.

{"5 Minutes Later..." appears onscreen, and Kano is holding a trophy.}

LIGHTNING GUY: Why do you hate me, world?

CHAOS: I don't believe he-a won. Who didn't plant the mines? Was it you, Kit-Kat box?

{Cut to the Kit-Kat box, on top of a pile of undersea explosives.}

LIGHTNING GUY: The Kit-Kat box has become so sexually frustrated that it's resorting to suicide.

CHAOS: Oh, just take the stupid trophy.

KANO: I heard you! You were going to have this contest fixed! You son of a- {intterupted}

LIGHTNING GUY: {intterupted} is really taking a beating here.

IORI: Language, Kano.

KANO: You speak english.

LIGHTNING GUY: And you speak idiot.

IORI: No, you have to watch yours! Anyways, who won 2nd and 3rd place?

CHAOS: Surprisingly, Kit Kat's girlfriend got second-

LIGHTNING GUY: Her corpse really knows how to ride a wave.

{Cut back to The Kit-Kat tear scene from before.}

CHAOS: And Nobody could win 3rd place

LIGHTNING GUY: I didn't know there was a character named "Nobody".

because all but two of you got blasted away by the mines.

KANO: You freakin' rigged the contest and tried to make me or/and Iori lose, didn't ya'?

CHAOS: Well, no. Just Iori.

LIGHTNING GUY: But Kano would have been a great plus.

And I would've gotten away with it too, if Kit-Kat would've planted the bombs he had!

IORI: What? Why me? What did I ever do to you?

LIGHTNING GUY: You were born.

CHAOS: Nothing. And that is very evil!

IORI: Your right, Kano. He is a son of a meanie.

LIGHTNING GUY: No, he's a son of a {intterupted}. Keep up!

CHAOS: {Gasps} YOU HATE ME! YAY! {Chaos hands Iori $1000 and the keys to a new car, as well as a tiny teddy bear.} There you go, new enemy. See you guys later! {walks off}

{Dalek rushes in again.}

DALEK: Help! Help! He's gone mental!

LIGHTNING GUY: That doesn't mean much coming from a mental person.

{Sephiroth rushes in too.}

SEPHIROTH: Ahem. I am going to take my authority as a creator, by being more active. And by doing that, I mean, I'm going to live in one of your homes, and hog your TV, and your icecream.

LIGHTNING GUY: Not the icecream!

DALEK: He wants your real estate!

{Emerl appears out of nowhere with a huge hammer}

EMERL:YOU WON'T GET MY SUMEMR HOUSE!

LIGHTNING GUY: "Though my winetr house is up for grabs."

{beats Sephiroth into a bloody pulp}

{Sephiroth outs Dalek in the way, and throws it at Emerl, causing them both to fall.}

DALEK: You're an Arse Sephiroth!

LIGHTNING GUY: Really? An Arse Sephiroth is even better than an Ultimate Sephiroth in the game!

JERAN: MORTAL PEEP FIGHT!

{Jeran takes his sword and trys to attack Sephiroth, but Sephiroth takes the sword and slices Jeran in half}

LIGHTNING GUY: That's what Jeran gets for misspelling tries.

(OOC: Sorry Seph)

JERAN: That...was unpleasant.

{Emerl Shoots a huge hole through Seph's stomach.}

LIGHTNING GUY: I didn't know that Emerl's last name was Shoots.

EMERL: You did always want to go on a diet, right?

KUNG LAO: QUIT STEALING MY FATALITY!

{OOC: Nah, it's fine. Using me as a tool of violence is okay in my book. :)}

{OOC: Lightning Guy hates all of you. D:<}

{Sephiroth picks up his flesh, and puts it back in place.}

SEPHIROTH: ...I know the ultimate punishment!! Stay back, or I'll use it!

LIGHTNING GUY: Only an Ultimate Sephiroth can use the ultimate punishment. An Arse Sephiroth uses the arse punishment. Keep up!

{Jeran is slowly dragging himself on the ground, trying to reach his own sword}

JERAN: Must...reach...

{Sephiroth picks up the sword, and puts it away.}

LIGHTNING GUY: "You can have this sword back at the end of class."

SEPHIROTH: I said, STAY BACK!

ROBOT SMOKE (MORTAL KOMBAT): {steals the sword from Sephiroth and runs away} Yoink!

SEPHIROTH: I DON'T NEED THE SWORD!!! MY ATTACK IS MUCH MORE POWERFUL!

LIGHTNING GUY: IT'S ARSE POWERFUL!

PATRICK: Suuuure. Is the sand castle done?

SEPHIROTH: I'll do it! It's worse than..... THE FREAKIN' ONE WINGED ANGEL, KEFKA, AND CHERNABOG FUSED!!!!

LIGHTNING GUY: That's nice.

PATRICK: ...I don't speak Final Fantasy.

SEPHIROTH: It makes.... umm.... SUB ZERO EXPLODE!!!

LIGHTNING GUY: That's even nicer.

SUB-ZERO (MORTAL KOMBAT): {walks onscreen} Hey, guys! {explodes}

SEPHIROTH: I haven't done it yet. It makes Satan look like Bambi!

LIGHTNING GUY: That's the nicest.

PATRICK: Well, apparently it makes Sub-Zero explode.

SEPHIROTH: Well, it's something to be reconed with anyway.

JCM: I hope you don't recon with it before marriage!

LIGHTNING GUY: I see that you regained consciousness.
JCM: {angry} Yeah, thanks for shooting me with lightning, by the way!

LIGHTNING GUY: No problem.

JERAN: Help. {waves hand}

KANO: {teleports in, and restores Jeran} Done. You're not cut in half anymore.

EMERL: I'LL MAKE YOU EXPLODE!

{Emerl ties the dynamite to Sephiroth.}

LIGHTNING GUY: The dynamite he made with his mind.

EMERL: Somebody seems to have forgotten that Seph broke the fourth wall a while back.

LIGHTNING GUY: Shame on Somebody for not making it a point to remember every time characters in a wiki user fanfic break the fourth wall!

{Emerl blows Sephiroth up.}

JERAN: Tanks, Kano. FOR MERIDELL!

{Jeran runs into the explosion, sending him sky-high. He then falls down in pieces}

JCM: I'm not sure what just happened.
LIGHTNING GUY: When you've been reading this as long as I have, you get used to the feeling.

JERAN: Well that sucked. This is worse than being sliced in two. I'm like...exploded in...erm...7.

KANO: {restores Jeran again}

LIGHTNING GUY: WHY

{The Smoke clears, revealing Sephiroth in a perfectaly perfect state of perfect perfection. Did I mention he was in perfectaly perfect form?}

SEPHIROTH: {Beep} you Emerl. {Beep} you to {Beep.} Time for your death.

JCM: Sephiroth! You weren't nearly this much of a potty mouth when we went to school together!

{Music starts.}

SEPHIROTH: {Singing, and everyone clutches their ears in horror.} I'ts a piece of cake

LIGHTNING GUY: That i't is.

to bake a pretty cake if the way is hazy
you gotta do the cooking by the book you know you can't be lazy
never use a messy recipe the cake would end up crazy

JCM: But what if the recipes in the book are messy?
LIGHTNING GUY: Shh! I'm trying to enjoy!

if you do it by the book then you'll have a cake
we gotta have it made you know that I love cake
finally it's time to make a cake!

LIGHTNING GUY: Give this man a Grammy! All the Grammys!

EMERL: THIS SONG SUCKS! {Covers his voice receptors}

SEPHIROTH: Well, you deserved it. You attack me for no reason.

JCM: Your appaling use of profanity is plenty reason to attack you!
{Lightning Guy groans.}

EMERL: Oh, dang!

{Cut to the destroyed sand replica.}

EMERL: We accidentally destroyed the village!

GEMERL: Well, that sucks. Who wants to go home?

LIGHTNING GUY: I do.

SEPHIROTH: Only if I get to torture Emerl with my Lazytown singing. I'll give you 10 bucks for you to let me do it.

GEMERL: Fifteen.

JCM: {sighs admirably} Capitalism at work.

SEPHIROTH: I don't have another 5 bucks, so... 20. I just need to payback Emerl for him being a {Beep.}

GEMERL: Deal. {Pockets the $20, unscrews Emerl's head, and hands it to Sephiroth} I usually like to kick it into his body, it you'd like some tips.}

LIGHTNING GUY: It only he did}

SEPHIROTH: {Plugs in an Ipod, and a Portable DVD player in Emerls head, and screws it back on.} There. He has no choice But watch Lazytown,

LIGHTNING GUY: But like girl with pink hair! But want to be pirate!

and listen to its songs at the same time! That, Gemerl, is the ultimate torture.

{Jeran slices himself apart for no reason}

JCM: All this gratuitous violence is making me sick! {vomits}

JERAN: Kano, don't even think about it.

JERAN:

LIGHTNING GUY:

EMERL: I have a better idea: {explodes}

GEMERL: That was a better idea.

SEPHIROTH: No mere mortal can resist, the evils of.... THE LAZYTOWN!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

JCM: I like LazyTown.
LIGHTNING GUY: You and But.

{Emerl pokes Sephiroth's back. When he turns around, Emerl shoots a huge cannon in Sephiroth's face, blasting him away.}

EMERL: Whoops he ran into my cannon.

SEPHIROTH: {Flies back down, and starts attacking Emerl.} BY THE TIME I'M FINISHED WITH YOU, YOU'RE GONNA BE MADE FOR GENERATING HAYLEY JOEL OSMENT AND UWE BOLL MOVIES!!!

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm pretty sure that only Hayley Joel Osment and Uwe Boll can generate Hayley Joel Osment and Uwe Boll movies.

{Kicks Emerls head, and whacks him with his own cannon, and proceeds to beat him up. Dalek comes in.}

DALEK: Wha?!

KANO: QUIT FIGHTING!!!!

JCM: Amen.

{Gemerl shoots Kano and pops a chair up over his corpse he sits down on it and starts eating popcorn}

GEMERL: This is good.

LIGHTNING GUY: I agree.

SEPHIROTH: He started it! This idiot started to attack me for no good reason! I asked for a hotel to live in, and he tried to smash me to death! So I think I should have the right to beat him up! ....I'll give you 20 bucks.

KANO: {ressurects and throws Gemerl and the chair away from him} I don't really give a crap who started it, I'll finish it!

SEPHIROTH: Don't worry, it's over now. {Pan down, to see Emerl all beaten up.}

LIGHTNING GUY: I can dig it.

{Cut to Emerl, who was watching the ordeal as well. Emerl lifts up the Body of Emerl to reveal it was a doll.}

EMERL: And that's why I didn't complain about being beaten up:Because I wasn't. Now, let's all go home. {hands Seph $20} that's for trying and failing so many times.

JCM: {sighs scornfully} Socialism at work.

{They start walking to the horizon.}

SEPHIROTH: You're a jerk Emerl.

{Jeran's arm waves to them}

{JCM vomits again.}

JERAN: A little help here? My neck is filling up with sand.

{Episode ends.}

JCM: I can wait to riff the rest of GGaHTF with you, Lightning Guy!

LIGHTNING GUY: Yeah, no. I'm locking that window first thing tomorrow.
JCM: Why?
LIGHTNING GUY: Well, for one thing, you vomited all over my studio.
JCM: Oh, right. Sorry.

{JCM crawls out of the window.}