Difference between revisions of "Ben and Alex visit The United States of America/Florida"

Revision as of 17:57, 27 January 2015

Ben and Alex ride the flow in Florida!

Transcript

{Ben and Alex touch down in the Miami airport. Funky 1980s synth is-..}

BEN: No.

ALEX: What are you talking about Ben?

BEN: No funky 80s synth, Alex. You promised me you wouldn't pull this 80s bullshit, you weren't even alive in the fucking 80s!

ALEX: But-..

BEN: NO BUTS ALEX, ONLY BUTTZ. NO 80S SHIT EITHER.

{Ben and Alex touch down in the Miami airport. The two emerge from the airport into the sunny streets of Miami in slow motion with Flo Rida's "Low" playing in the background. They're both wearing hawaiian shirts with white shorts and highly expensive rayban sunglasses.}

ALEX: FLORIDA. The sunny state of America. Home to excruciating heat, crazy meth heads, crappy laws, theme parks everywhere, rogue alligators, and rich white retirees who tend to be super rude. Isn't this the life, Ben?

{Alex turns around to see that Ben has already been eaten by an alligator.}

ALEX: Oh for fuck's

{Cut to the streets of Miami. Ben has been taped back together with scotch tape.}

BEN: alex im not liking florida already :(

ALEX: Eh, you'll be fine. You're made of SCOTCH tape! The finest of all tapes! Especially better than that there wankerin' arse English tape.

BEN: They don't even make English tape? I mean there's Duck Tape-

ALEX: That's what I meant, Dutch tape! I hate the Dutch. It's in my Scottish genes too.

BEN: i thought you just like scotch tape because you thought they made it with actual scotch

ALEX: {now visibly drunk, bottle of scrumpy in hand} yyyyya wanna fite, m8? ill fucking slap u up m8, swear on my tesco, u fucken lil cunt m8

{A passerby passes by}

PASSERBY: Excuuuuuse me, you did not just use the See You Next Tuesday word?