Mystery Fanstuff Theater 3000/Space-Aged Stupidity/eps/1

Summary

It's

CHWOKA: A BEAUTIFUL DAY

been

CHWOKA: ONE WEEK SINCE YOU LOOKED AT ME, COCKED YOUR HEAD AND SAID "I'M ANGRY"
BLUEBRY: did somebody say cocks

a

CHWOKA: LOOOONNNNGGGGG DECEMBER, AND THERE'S REASON TO BELIEVE

year,

CHWOKA: IT DOESN'T SURPRISE ME. "HAPPY CHRISTMAS," I WRAPPED IT UP AND SENT IT,
NACHOMAN: shut up, chwoka

since the World blew up.

Transcript

SEPHIROTH: It's been a year, since our

NACHOMAN: last English class. Maybe more.

planet was blown up,

CHWOKA: oh really

and billions have been killed.

CHWOKA: "After the world explosion, I mean.

On the bright side though, we have enough Curry, to last us for 100 years!

CHWOKA: "On the other hand, no refridgeration."
SKUB: Wouldn't they just have the stupid little space powder stuff

CHAOS: And I just got my medical degree online with one of those online college courses. Well, actually, it was my G.E.D.

BLUEBRY: 100% "legal" order today!!

SEPHIROTH: Chaos. You are a brilliant doctor. You may have a habit of killing the patient when something goes wrong, but, still.

CHAOS: Yes. {shifting eyes} a Coincidental habit. Not because I need their organs or anything.

BLUEBRY: their delicious organs

{The hologram of CC comes up}

NACHOMAN: guys im riffing this trash at school and the friday announcements are on tv and holy shit they are so bad we should riff them instead of this

CC: Good morning Sephiroth, Chaos.

CHAOS: Good morning test subje-CC.

CHWOKA: this doesn't even work because he's a hologram

Do you want some curry?

SEPHIROTH: Curry? My curry! ....You can have some.... BUT NOT ALL!!!!

CHWOKA: is this a joke

CC: Uh, Chaos, I'm a hologram.

BLUEBRY: "Holograms love curry!"

CHAOS: Let's say I needed to make some spicy food in the wee hours of the morning to pour on someone's lap to make their skin dissolve so I can dissect them.

CHWOKA: Dude, at least earlier you were covert abut your organ harvesting.

Could I use it then?

SEPHIROTH: Or, you could use Acid. Spicy food is mine!

NACHOMAN: hahaha that loveable Sephiroth always obsessed with spicy food oh man what a card

But you can have some...

CC: {Sighs} It's times like this I'm glad that rouge lawnmower cut my head off.

BLUEBRY: i'm so glad that in the future lawnmowers come in pretty colors

SEPHIROTH: Yeah, but you can't Taste, Feel, or Smell.

NACHOMAN: but can he Love???

And you have a "H" on your forehead.

CHWOKA: For Hadultery.

For Hologram. Doesn't that bother you?

CC: Yeah. Dang watermarks.

NACHOMAN: they stole cc from stockholograms.com

USERUNKNOWN:I think it does.Since you can change it to a target symbol!{Pulls out gun}Hold still.

CHWOKA: DON'THATEME'CAUSEMYSPACEBARISBROKEN.

SEPHIROTH: Good thing he can't feel. But don't harm my CURRY!!!

BLUEBRY: curry can feel :((
CHWOKA: OKAY YOU GUYS, I HAVE MY ONE JOKE, CAN I JOIN NOW

{CC's robot wheels under the hologram generator pushes him to a pod. He uses robot arms to open it. Inside is a malfunctioning lawnmower}

CC: Some day, I'll get my revenge.

NACHOMAN: Against all the lawnmowers that taunted me in high school.

USERUNKNOWN:How did he get to be captain, Chaos?

CHAOS: Let me take out your jugular, and I'll tell you!

USERUNKNOWN:Let me remove your life and soul first.

NACHOMAN: oh, why must they fight so!

CHAOS: Oh, they're in glass jars in my room.

BLUEBRY: next to the tee-ball trophies

Now, everyone to the meeting table!

CHWOKA: "Or should I say... SURGERY TABLE. Or should I say... MURDER TABLE."

{They all press buttons

CHWOKA: Any button will do. They all do the same thing anyway.

and teleport to the meeting room, with a round table, but their haeds are on backwards, like in Spaceballs.}

'CHWOKA: OHHHH, so THAT'S what you meant by "heads on backwards." I was a bit confused until you referenced the movie, now it's like a photograph in my mind.
NACHOMAN: they were all wearing shoes, much like the characters in Raiders of the Lost Ark

CHAOS: Oh, dear. Everyone port back!

CHWOKA: Now starboard forward!


CHWOKA: they're crew of a spaceship okay, they HAVE to know what it means

{Everyone teleports back,

NACHOMAN: actually, they teleported into someone's back, it wasn't very pleasant

and just walks into the next room via the door, and sits at the table.}

CHAOS: Good news everyone! I've invented a french-speaking ninja chimp!

CHWOKA: what does this have to do with anything

CC: Oh boy.

NACHOMAN: Four thousand holes in Blackburn Lancashire

CHAOS: The problem is...

BLUEBRY: "it spends all it's day smoking and bitching about 'ennui'"

it's really small.

BLUEBRY: that's what she said

{Chaos puts a cage the size of a coffee mug on the table. A ninja monkey is inside.}

MONKEY:{irish accent} Oy, this is a mighty predicament I've gotten meself into!

BLUEBRY: they're after his lucky charms

CHAOS: And I could only make give him an irish accent.

CHWOKA: But you said it spoke French
NACHOMAN: it's all Europe, who cares

{CC waves his hand through the cage}

CC: What you gonna' do about this?

CHAOS: The monkey? Eh, I'll probably just scrap him and reuse the vital organs tha I don't damage.

SEPHIROTH: Or, you could throw him in the room of.... THE WIBBLES!!

CHAOS: No, I fed them on my way to the bridge.

CHWOKA: Number one rule of Improv: never say "No."

{GIM2-B4RD walks in.}

GIM2-B4RD: {sounding really depressed} Hey guys. Looks like the Wibbles need feeding again.

CHWOKA: Number one rule of Improv: never say "No."

They almost tore off my leg.

{Zoom in on GIM2's leg where a few circuits are poking out from where the leg is connected to the main body. Zoom back out.}

SEPHIROTH: The Wibbles always attack Robots. They think they're made of Candy. For Humans, they're okay. Like me!

CHWOKA: Number one rule of Improv: never say "No."

{Gets Wibble, which Purrs.}

{OOC: In this, Sephiroth is human. This is an Alternate Universe altogether.}

NACHOMAN: excuse me this episode violates the space-aged stupidity canon!!!

GIM2: Lucky for you. Starting up tagline program...

{Lights on GIM2 start flashing and beeping noises start coming from him. After a few seconds, it stops and GIM2's eyes turn red.}

GIM2: {robotic voice} Gee I Am Too BoReD.

CHWOKA: :o)

{GIM2's eyes go back to their normal colour of bright blue.}

CHWOKA: So what purpose did that digression serve, then.

{OOC: Yes, they're blue. - Znex}

GIM2: {normal voice; ie. depressed} Now, thanks to my programming, I now have to ask if you would all like a drink.

SEPHIROTH: Nah, I'm alright. I've had my share of liquor.

CHWOKA: Now on to CURRY!!!
NACHOMAN: You drank before writing this? I am shocked!!!

GIM2: Thank goodness I don't have to get that drink thing out. It's so cumbersome. By the way, what course are we set on?

SEPHIROTH: No idea. I'll have a look. {Looks on monitor. It is going towards a planet made of Titanium.} Titanius 14. Wanna go on it?

USERUNKNOWN:Hmmmmm....what's the pizza like there?

CHWOKA: Crunchy and shiny.

GIM2: Don't bother asking, there is no pizza. It's just made of titanium. Space pilots often stop by these planets to collect titanium for their ships. There is the Titanius Refill Station which is currently orbiting Titanius Prime, or Titanius 1, but there's no pizza.

SEPHIROTH: But, they have a fun minecart ride!

USERUNKNOWN: No, let us not go there.

CHWOKA: Let us not tarry!!!
SKUB: let us not CURRY

SEPHIROTH: Lemme think... {5 Minutes Later, and Sephiroth kicks Userunknown in the crotch.}

CHWOKA: Well he's certainly not CURRYING favor.

Nope, we're going. We running low on Titanium for many uses, including Chaos's Suspicious Experiments, The Ship's Supply, Food for the Wibbles, Upgrades for GIM2, and weapons for me. {Cut to the ship landing on the planet.}

USERUNKNOWN: Ha ha, I'm wearing armor.

CHWOKA: "I was just waiting for you to finish speaking until I said that." also NEVER SAY NO

{Pulls out a gun and aims at Sephiroth} For that, you gotta get me ammo and a space ship.

CHWOKA: uh, who says

SEPHIROTH: No. And if you shoot me, you'll face the ultimate penalty. Murder of the Captain, followed by Death by Firing Squad, and hanging. Now. {Grabs gun, and throws it into space.}

USERUNKNOWN: Uh-oh {Gun explodes,

BLUEBRY: it was a bomb the whole time

almost destroying the engines} Wow.

{GIM2 sighs and walks over to the engines.}

GIM2: Another explosion, another repair.

CHWOKA: "If you can't tell, I'm Marvin. Siiiiiiggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhh."

{GIM2 gets out a sonic screwdriver and starts fixing the engines.}

USERUNKNOWN:Okay, let's go to Titanius after the repairs are done{ooc:Do you think this is a good time to end the episode?}

NACHOMAN: a good time to end the episode was about fifty lines ago

{OOC: It's still pretty short. Maybe after like 10 more lines.}

'CHWOKA: EVERY 10 LINES

SEPHIROTH: Well, let's go on the minecart! {Hops onto the minecart.}

{OOC:Can most of the episodes from now start in the meeting room, With Chaos exhibiting a new creation, like in Futurama?}

{OOC: Sure!}

USERUNKNOWN:Uh, no thanks.I'll go and look at the hanger.

CHWOKA: "Look at 'im dangle."</br>NACHOMAN: the national coat hanger museum is quite interesting, i've heard

{CC drives the robot body until he falls in the minecart}

CC: ROAD TRIP! ROAD TRIP!

{Everyone else hops in the minecart, and through the tunnel is Chaos' laboratory. He is currently doing something that nobody can see, because he's hunched over, and he does not hear them enter.}

USERUNKNOWN:{Off screen}Are you okay down there?

CHAOS: What? Who said that! Oh! Good1 I wanted to show you all what I just made! It's the cure for any disease ever made!

{Chaos holds up a chicken drumstick.}

BLUEBRY: except heart disease

CHAOS: I'm currently working on a version that can play music, too!

USERUNKNOWN:{Still off screen, he is not in the room}What did you say?

CHAOS: {Speaking into the drumstick} I SAID I MADE A CURE FOR ALL DISEASES! IT WILL SOON BE ABLE TO PLAY MUSIC, TOO!

{ooc:10 more lines!Let's end the episode!}

CHWOKA: OBSESSIVE LINE COUNTS ARE THE QUICK ROUTE TO QUALITY

USERUNKNOWN:That drumstick?

{Pans to Chaos, who has eaten the drumstick.}

CHAOS: Oh. Yeah. That was the cure.

CHWOKA: "Now I can never die!"

Well, alls terrible that ends terrible!

THE END