Color Printer's E-mails/Homsar

Summary

CP crushes Homsar with a heavy weight. Or does he?

Cast: Color Printer, Homsar

Transcript

Color Printer: Strollin' through the e-mail park, with my e-mail car, and my e-mail girl.

Hi Color Printer,
If you hate Homsar so much, 
why don't you kill him?
-Vinnie C.

Color Printer: {clears screen, starts typing} Well, Vinnie Coma, there's two things wrong with this e-mail. One: "Hi Color Printer" makes it sound like we're having a conversation. Which we're not. And two: {does not type "and"} I don't hate Homsar! He's cool. I actually speak his language.

{Cut to the stick, where Color Printer and Homsar are standing.}

Homsar: DaAaAaAaAa! My turtle broke the speed limit! {A translation at the bottom reads "DaAaAaAaAa! My pet dog ran away!"}

Color Printer: You have pickled eels? {"You have a pet dog?"} How long has he worn that pair of underpants? {"How long have you had him?"}

Homsar: {sadly} Ever since the grave blew up. {"Ever since the day I found him."}

Color Printer: Don't worry! {no translation needed} He'll come out from out from under the manhole! {"He'll come home soon!"}

{Cut back to the computer room.}

Color Printer: {still typing} Okay, I don't understand his language. I just said some random stuff. Apparently, he understood it. And unless my Homsarish is a little rusty, {pause} he said his pet monkey ran away from the cage and that he had him ever since 'ol Pietimer died. {stops typing} Anyway, this e-mail show is over. Now get!

{The paper comes down.}

Easter Eggs

• Click on "Homsarish" to see a book titled Understanding Homsar: An Idiot's Guide to Homsarish.

Fun Facts

• Pietimer is a reference to That a Ghost.