User:Lucian Summers/Toons/2014Trailer

Zarel Emails: The Returnening

They're back!

Cast (in order of appearance): Offscreen Announcer, Strong Bad, Fang, Bubs, Strong Sad, Marzipan, Zarel, Strong Mad, The Cheat, Pter, Homestar Runner, Foxx

Places: Dining Room, Bubs' Concession Stand, Marzipan's Gazebo, The Field, The Roomy-Vac, Strongbadia, The Locker Room, Marshmallow's Last Stand

Page Title: Now with 30% less calories!

Transcript

{Cut to a black screen, with the Offscreen Announcer's words appearing on screen. This happens each time the Offscreen Announcer speaks.}

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: They're back, in a way you've never seen them before!

{Cut to Dining Room, Strong Bad lifts his head up from reading a newspaper.}

STRONG BAD: Did you say "mounds of gold?!"

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: After two years of inactivity...

{Cut to Fang at Bubs' Concession Stand}

FANG: {points to Bubs} I believe your evidence is forged!

BUBS: But I was trying to sell you plastic forks!

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: And two years of more inactivity...

{Cut to Strong Sad at Marzipan's Gazebo}

STRONG SAD: How many times must I do this until you're satisfied?

MARZIPAN: Now do it right this time, like he used to!

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: They're finally back.

{Cut to a close-up of Zarel's face. He's shaking while alarm sounds play.}

ZAREL: She's going down, Captain!

{Pan out to see Strong Mad holding a large cardboard box, which Zarel was sitting in, pretending to fly a plane. The Cheat is holding a boombox with an alarm sound playing.}

ZAREL: Forget it, this sucks.

STRONG MAD: {dejectedly} Aw...

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: Zarel Emails is back!

{Cut to Zarel at the Roomy-Vac, checking an email}

subject: paper plate

Zarel
Whats your favorite kind of paper plate
Johnny

{Zarel has already typed: "Well isn't this an interesting question. Do I even use paper plates? There was that one time where I had one at Strong Bad's birthday party when we were in our hot prime, and that one was pretty cool.}

ZAREL: {typing} But if I had to choose a personal favorite of all of the ones I've used...

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: New characters!

{Cut to Pter at Bubs'}

PTER: But I've been on-

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: New stages!

{Cut to Zarel in Strongbadia holding his fist in the air}

ZAREL: Shenanigans!

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: New downloadable costumes for Zarel and Fang when you pre-order from Gamestop!

{Cut to The Locker Room, Zarel and Fang are obscured by shower curtains}

ZAREL: {scared} AHH, my skin!

OFFSCREEN ANNOUNCER: And of course, pop culture references up the nose! {The word nose turns lime green and drips as if it were snot}

{Cut to Homestar Runner and Foxx at Marshmallow's Last Stand. Foxx is seething mad.}

HOMESTAR: I question thee, Foxx, what do y-

{Foxx cuts off Homestar's sentence by hitting him with a metal baseball bat.}

FOXX: NO!

OFFSCREEN EMAILS: Zarel Emails! Returning 2014 and maybe staying for a few weeks! Or months. Who knows? I don't.

Trivia

• I dunno.