RiffText/Green Grass and High Tides Forever!/4

BANG! POW! ZING! INSERT SUPERMAN SOUND EFFECT HERE!

GREEN GRASS AND HIGH TIDES FOREVER

---

{Cut to Emerl and Gemerl in the field.}

EMERL: Man, I wish I had a new friend to play with. My YTP friends all keep dying because I lethally harm them.

LIGHTNING GUY: I wonder why it's hard for you to make friends.

GEMERL: I feel for ya, brother.

EMERL: Oh, I wish we had some cool new friend!

?????: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah-

LIGHTNING GUY: ????? perfectly represents the anguish I feel when I read this.

{Jeran falls from the sky and lands flat on his face}

JERAN: Ow...did Kass drop me out of a plane?

EMERL: {With only 2 incredibly small eyes on his face} ZOHMYGODANEWFRIENDFELLFROMTHESKYKTHXGA4WD.

LIGHTNING GUY: PUTTINGTHEWORDSYOUSAYTOGETHERDOESNOTMAKEYOUCOOLALSOKILLYOURSELF

GEMERL: And who are you?

JERAN: {notices Gemerl} AAAH! Wait...you're not Darigan. My name is Jeran.

DALEK: Oh my. Neopets.

LIGHTNING GUY: My thoughts exactly.

JERAN: Oh my. Doctor Who.

LIGHTNING GUY: My exact thoughts.

DALEK: Goodness Gracious. A Lupe.

LIGHTNING GUY: Get Out.

JERAN: Uh...ok. So...nice to meet you all! Wait...what are your names?

DALEK: I have no name. I'm Dalek. I'm from the 1970's Series.

LIGHTNING GUY: Which 1970's series? All in the Family?

JERAN: Nice to meet you, Dalek. {to Emerl and Gemerl} And what about you two robots?

IORI: {falls from the top of the screen} Ow! I'm never skydiving again.

JERAN: Did you get kicked out of a plane by Kass too?

LIGHTNING GUY: Yes. He totally wasn't skydiving, which one would assume from him saying "I'm never skydiving again."

IORI: No, I went skydiving.

LIGHTNING GUY: NO, WE JUST WENT OVER THIS.

Wait, who are you? I haven't seen you around here.

JERAN: My name is Jeran.

IORI: Ha, Jeran sounds like a girls name!

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm the only fellow who can ridicule people's name here, I-bore-i.

PATRICK: {comes in} Iori, don't insult.... whoever this person is.

LIGHTNING GUY: He just said his name was Jeran. I knew you were an idiot, but I didn't know you had short-term memory loss.

He looks like a Neopet.

JERAN: I am. I've saved lives from evil forces in Meridell, and I had set off on a new quest. The King had ordered me to disgrace Lord Kass, so I got out the old stinkbombs I had when I was young. I spotted his castle on a nearby cliff, and I...erm...slipped.

{Lightning Guy is heard snoring.}

PATRICK: Ah yes, Meridell.

KANO: {lightning strikes; Kano appears} I'M INVINCIBLE!

LIGHTNING GUY: (wakes up) Damn it, Kano! I was planning on sleeping through this entire episode! Why did you have to go and abuse lightning again?

PATRICK: {to Kano} You're a looney. {Kano shoots lightning at Patrick who falls over afterwards} I'm okay!

KANO: Who's this?

LIGHTNING GUY: "This" being a pronoun that could apply to anybody, but why not make your readers play the guessing game?

PATRICK: Some Lupe knight named Jeran.

LIGHTNING GUY: And Jeran wins!

JERAN: Nice to meet you. {thinking} Urgh. I don't like this guy...

KANO: I read your mind, 'foo!

LIGHTNING GUY: NO

Why don't you like me? I just met you sorta.

JERAN: {thoughts} This guy...he's got quite the power...his power level must be like...over 9000 or something!

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm pretty sure he's established that he can read your mind. Also, you suck.

{normal} Sorry for the misunderstanding, Kano. It's nice to meet you.

KANO: Thank you, I do got quite the power.

LIGHTNING GUY: NO

It was nice to meet you too.

JERAN: So before anyone asks, what kind of stuff do I do?

LIGHTNING GUY: Nobody was going to ask.

Well, I'm sick nasty with a sword,

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm sure you are.

I can tear a Mr. Hedgehog into bits,

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm sure you can.

and...I'm pretty dang sweet with a guitar. Yes, I'm not just a Meridell knight.

LIGHTNING GUY: I'm sure you aren't.

PATRICK: Guitar, eh?

JERAN: Yesh.

IORI: Your name still sounds like a girl's name!

LIGHTNING GUY: Iori once again demonstrates her uselessness.

PATRICK: Be's quiet! {punches Iori}

LIGHTNING GUY: For once, Patrick does something I like...while saying something I hate.

GEMERL: Now that that's over, {Turns arms into machine guns and points at Jeran's face.} STATE YOU BUSINESS HERE.

JERAN: Um...what do you guys do here for a living? What's this show about?

LIGHTNING GUY: I don't think even the writers know the answers to those questions.

GEMERL: I said...STATE...YOUR...BUISNESS.

DALEK: Actually, you said "State YOU Business.

LIGHTNING GUY: Dalek caught a spelling error before me? What messed-up universe am I living in?

...Oh yeah, this is pre-emptive. {An Army of Daleks fly in.}

GEMERL: I really hate you guys.

LIGHTNING GUY: You're not the only one.

DALEK: We're not big fans of you either! You're rude, arrogant, and annoying!

LIGHTNING GUY: That's just called "blending in with the crowd".

Emerl however, is really cool.

LIGHTNING GUY: That's the first funny thing that anybody's said in this series.

{Cut to Emerl, slicing his hand off with a katana.}

EMERL: {Like Salad Fingers} I like it when the yellow sparks come out.

{Cut back.}

LIGHTNING GUY: Did GGaHTF just do a cutaway gag? It is now beyond redemption.

DALEK: I said he's cool, not smart!

GEMERL: But he just quoted an unpopular flash series!

EMERL:...{FOURTH WALL BREAKAGE!!!}

LIGHTNING GUY: There's nothing annoying about this guy! He's the poster boy for cool!

GEMERL: Anyways, we still need to sort out what's up with the blue dude.

JCM: Did somebody ask for me?
LIGHTNING GUY: Get out of here, JCM. Nobody likes your style.

Why don't you go blow up Hotel Mario and impale Mario and Luigi on a giant needle?

LIGHTNING GUY: Because it's immoral and wrong and

DALEK: Good idea! {Cut to Hotel mario, in which Dalek comes in and blasts it. Mario and luigi fly out, and get impaled into a spike pit.} Thanks Scorpion! {Cut back.}