Zarel Emails/19

Zarel E-Mail #19

Zarel does some annual spring cleaning.

Cast (in order of appearance): Zarel, Strong Bad, The Cheat, Bubs, Strong Sad, Homestar Runner, Grape Fairy (Easter Egg), Fat Bee (Easter Egg)

Places: Zarel's House, Strong Badia

Transcript

{Cut to Zarel's Room}

ZAREL: Being the commander of this computer, I'll just slip the email through the crack in the door! Alright, it's almost spring, and I've got a truckload of new messages, so it's time for some cleaning.

subj: soft drink!!!!!

Hey Mr. Dead Fish.

As many know, I am an addict for Orange Fanta
to the extent that I'm reffered to as Soda Popinski's twin brother.
Do you have any soft drink preferences?

-Simon Ignut

ZAREL: {typing} Yeah, I mostly go for the fizzy energy drinks, but I think because of them I've been gaining weight, so I'm cutting down on them and going for the regular soft drinks. Gotta love Mountain Dew. {hits enter} Okay, what's next?

subj: lol

hi u zarul
do u lyke 2 lol
if u r a prep that stand for laff out lowd noob

ZAREL: {typing} ...no, just no. This one wins the nice-

DELETED!

ZAREL: ...award. Next!

subj: Kittens and Puppies

Dear Zarel,
What's the best way to frame someone for robbery?
Totally not being suspicious,

ZAREL: {typing} Well, Zoo977, when robbing, just take the most useless item you can find, then just-

{Cut to Strong Badia, Strong Bad and The Cheat are playing with paddleballs.}

ZAREL: {voiceover} -give the useless item to an innocent bystander!

{Zarel walks on holding a load of explosives}

ZAREL: {quickly} Here you go! {hands Strong Bad a pen, runs off}

STRONG BAD: Woah! A Trogdor pen, with real fire-breathing action!

{Bubs walks in rather mad}

BUBS: Give those back!

STRONG BAD: What?

BUBS: My fireworks! You stole them!

STRONG BAD: Oh, I didn't take them. Zarel just came by with a mound of explosives in his hand-

{Bubs uppercuts Strong Bad offscreen, who later appears spinning in the background, only to disappear in a 4-point star accompanied by a "ding."}

BUBS: And stay out!

{Cut back to the Cappy}

ZAREL: Ah, foolproof. Okay, what's up next?

subj: Voice Over Artist

Dear Zarel,

If you had the chance to meet
any voice over artist or visit the company said voice over artist works for,
who and what would it be? I sure would like to meet Brian Drummond
and Terry Klassen over at Ocean Group.

Lemkeburg's favorite albino Kiwi,

Jonn O'Hamsters

ZAREL: If anything, I'd love to meet those guys who do my voice...and everyone else's really. What's his name...Mike Chapstick? Eh, I forget. I forgot which one does the voice of the Poopsmith anyway. Hey, I could do a great impression of the Poopsmith! Watch! {stays silent for a bit}

{Zoom out to show Strong Sad with a stopwatch in hand}

ZAREL: {gasping for air} I couldn't do it...how long was I not talking?

STRONG SAD: 6.34 seconds! A new record over your old one of 3.14!

ZAREL: {still gasping} Wonderful! That could go in the books.

STRONG SAD: I'll send in your feat tomorrow with the stopwatch used to record your time!

ZAREL: {inhales and sighs} Thanks, now for one more email.

subj: Do ya like Waffles? gotta love waffles

Dear Dragonm'n Z.

You have won one million (1,000,000) Waffles.
What do you plan to do with them? Will you share them with your friends or lack thereof?
I'll tell you what I'm going to do now. I'M GOING TO DISNEYLAND!

Yours falsely, The Waffle Contest Commission.

P.S. the come with whipped cream and whatever topping you may like.

ZAREL: {typing} Aw, no man! Go to Disney World! You might be able to catch a glimpse of the Mickey's Toontown demolition! There's also Test Tra-WHAT?!

{the beeping of a truck is heard outside, as if it's backing up. Cut to Zarel's front door Zarel walks out. Cut to a shot of a dump truck dumping a pile of waffles on Zarel}

ZAREL: GBLARGH! Oh, hey, this one's whipped cream!

{Cut to Homestar in the driver's seat}

HOMESTAR: Happy T to you too, orangem'n!

{The Paper}

Easter Eggs

• Click on Homestar and something will happen.

{The Grape Fairy flies in on the bee and turns all the waffles into grapes.}

Fun Facts

• Mickey's Toontown is, or rather was, a place in Disney World, but is queued for demolition.

Also, Test Track is a ride at Epcot, one of the four Disney World parks.

• Happy T refers to the toon of the same name.