Color Printer's E-mails/No Love

Summary

No one loves Color Printer. Or at least, that's what the plot of this e-mail was supposed to be.

Cast: Color Printer, Daymond, Daymond's Wife,

Transcript

Color Printer: Time to drive down the e-mail road in my e-mail car with my e-mail girls!

nobody loves u

-everyone

Color Printer: {clears screen, starts typing} Oh, yeah! I've seen that show, "Nobody Loves You"! It's the greatest thing on television ever since...um...some TV show. Anyways, did ya'll catch the latest episode last night? I taped it, so I'll play it!

{Cut to CP's VCR. On the label reads "Nobody Loves You: Episode 23". The tape goes in. Cut to a title card that reads "Nobody Loves You" in fancy lettering. Cut to a house.}

Daymond: Come on, honey! We've got to go get the tickets for the movie!

Daymond's Wife: {offscreen} Coming, Daymond!

{Cut to the outside of "MOVIE THEATER DELUXE PLUS".}

Daymond's Wife: What do you mean, "Double or Nothing" is sold out?

Ticket Salesman: We sold all the tickets half an hour ago.

Daymond's Wife: {turns to Daymond} You said there were tickets left for sale!

Daymond: B-but I checked on my c-computer!

{Cut to a flashback of Daymond using his computer, NotSoGood 386. He clicks on "Movie Tickets?" He types in "Double or Nothing". A message pops up saying, "Heck, yeah, they still have tickets!" Cut back to the movie theater.}

Daymond's Wife: You checked on that old thing? ARGH! I told you to sell that!

Daymond: Well, the highest offer was $11.01!

Daymond's Wife: Maybe because it's a no-good, lousy, operating system that you bought from a con artist who's now in JAIL! {turns back to Ticket Salesman} Are you sure you're sold out?

Ticket Clerk: {annoyed} Yes, I chcked 10 times already!

Daymond's Wife: ARRRGHH!!! {sighs} All right, Daymond, what do you want to see?

{Cut back to the computer room.}

Color Printer: {typing} And it all goes downhill from there, folks! {stops typing} Tune in next time on: {singing} Cp's E-mail Shooooooooooow! {holds last note until The Paper finishes coming down} Yeah!

Easter Eggs

• Click on "latest episode" to see the cover of "TV Episode Guide" On the cover it reads "Daymond and Wife Breaking Up?!?"
• Click on "downhill" to see Daymond's ticket to "Down the Hill Again".

Fun Facts

• "Nobody Loves You" is meant to be a reference to "Everybody Loves Raymond", seeing as how the main character is Daymond.
• The Movies playing at "MOVIE THEATER DELUXE PLUS" are, according to the marquee:
  • Double or Nothing (PG)
  • Down the Hill Again (PG-13)
  • Funtime Movie (G)
  • Wrath of Urk I(R)
  • Murder Man II (Beyond R)
• $11.01 is a reference to the cost of action figures in Free Country USA.
• "TV Episode Guide" is a reference to the popular TV guide: "TV Guide"!