Color Printer's E-mails/Advertisement

Summary

Color Printer advertises. And breaks the fourth wall.

Cast: Color Printer, Strong Sad, Cheerleader, So and So, What's Her Face, The Ugly One. Bitmap, Marzipan, Senor Cardgage (easter egg)

Transcript

COLOR PRINTER: Just because e-mail can anagramed to become "iLame" doesn't make it lame.

Subject: advertise!

Color Printer,
How come nobody, like, emails you anymore?
You should get a sponsor and advertise your stuff adverywheres!
Filled with a bucket of Prawn Salad,

Markiiiiiiiieeeeeeeee

{pronounces name as "Mark-aye-aye! Aye-aye...aye...eeeeee."}

COLOR PRINTER: {typing} Well, Mark-eight-i's-nine-e's, I've been thinking about that for a long, long time. And I've come with a lot of great solutions! Okay, most of them sucked. But it was worth a try! Like guest stars!

{Cut to a flash back. Hip-hop music is playing. On the screen are the words "COLOR PRINTER'S E-MAIL-TYPE SHOW (with guest star!)"}

NARRATOR: Tonight on Color Printer's E-mail-Type Show, we have a special guest: Strong Sad!

{Cut to Color Printer and Strong Sad.}

COLOR PRINTER: So, tell the audience your name, uh...{looks at note card} Strong Sad.

STRONG SAD: You just told them my name!

COLOR PRINTER: Um, right. How are you?

STRONG SAD: I feel like I'll soon be five dollars richer.

COLOR PRINTER: {confused expression} And why is that?

STRONG SAD: Because The Cheat said he'd pay me five dollars to be on this stupid show.

COLOR PRINTER: Hey!

STRONG SAD: Sorry.

COLOR PRINTER: But you do know that The Cheat pays people with pencil shavings, right?

STRONG SAD: {record skids} What?!?

{Cut back to the computer.}

COLOR PRINTER: {still typing} So after that, it all went downhill from there. Then I went in a totally other direction: celebrity endorsement!

{Cut to a TGS scene (in color). TGS music is playing.}

CHEERLEADER: Color Printer's e-mail show is-

CHEERLEADER, SO AND SO and THE UGLY ONE: SO GOOD!
WHAT'S HER FACE: {simultaneously} NO GOOD!

{Color Printer comes out and throws an arrow at What's Her Face.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: ANGRY WRITER'D!

WHAT'S HER FACE: I'll never trust electronic printing devices again.

{What's Her Face is crushed by a falling inkjet printer.}

NARRATOR STRONG BAD: INKJET'D!

WHAT'S HER FACE: Ouch.

{Cut back to the computer.}

COLOR PRINTER: {clears screen, typing} That also sucked. So now, I've finally found my advertisement calling: annoying banners and pop-up ads!!!

{Cut to Bitmap surfing the web. Pop-up ads for CP's e-mail show keep popping up.}

HEY YOU!
CLICK HERE TO WATCH COLOR PRINTER'S E-MAIL SHOW!
IT ROXORS!

{Bitmap keeps closing them. However, they keep coming up faster. Eventually, the screen is covered in pop-ups.}

BITMAP: GAH!!!!!!!

{Cut to Marzipan on her computer, browsing the internet. She types in "dolphinsafeclub.org" into her address bar. When the page loads, there is a banner at the top.}

MARZIPAN: What the-?

HEY YOU!
COLOR PRINTER'S E-MAIL SHOW IS AWESOME!!!
OVER 45 "EPISODES"!
CLICK HERE TO E-MAIL COLOR PRINTER!!

Easter Eggs

• Click on "dolphinsafeclub.org" at the end to see another "celebrity" endorsement.

{Cut to Senor Cardgage. He is wearing a coffee-stained shirt that reads "I LIKE PRINTER'S EMAIL SHOW".}

SENOR CARDGAGE: {mumbling} That printer-type guy's e-mail show is so good, I have all the merchandise!

{Various other merchandise appear with the same text as Senor Cardgage's shirt on them. As Senor Cardgage calls out the name of the object, they light up.}

SENOR CARDGAGE: {voice-over} Coffee cups, tote bags, baseball hats, calenders, water bottles, and hoodies! Get your printer-type e-mail show merchandise today!

{Text appears at the bottom of the screen reading "This merchandise is not official."}

Fun Facts

• The Cheat paying with pencil shavings is a reference to lackey.
• The TGS scene being color is a reference to TGS Issue 10.
• Marzipan's browser is called "Nature-Safe Explorer".