(even if you aren't vegan)
To Dreamland and Back
"A road comedy in a world not quite like ours.."
Act 1: In Which Both Premise and Characters are Established with Relation to Story
- A VERY LARGE COCKROACH lays atop a barn, on his back. He snores.
...well, ladies, you can call me Mitch...
- INFLATED SUIT struggles to get atop the barn. MITCH turns over, away from Suit. Suit waves his arm frantically.
...french toast...caviar...
- SUIT grips the gutter with his cuffs. MITCH rolls over again, away from Suit, and falls off the top of the barn. Mitch jolts stiff, and flips over. He rubs his head, and looks at his surroundings. When he sees Suit, he gives a slight jump, and begins walking upright towards
Suit, why did you throw me off the top of the barn?
- SUIT waggles around frantically.
Wait... what?
- SUIT inflates himself and waggles spastically.
Where? I've gotta see this!
- SUIT and MITCH are out front of a club. A OVERSIZED PENCIL blocks the entryway. A FISH sits at a stand, to the left of Mitch and Suit. Mitch walks up to the pencil, carrying Suit with him.
Two swingin' guys ready to party! Right, Suit?
- MITCH lifts SUIT up. Suit does not respond.
No can do.
What!? Why not?
Read the sign.
- PENCILLIN falls over, revealing a sign reading "Seals Only". SUIT pulls out a cigar from his breast pocket, and lights it. MITCH takes the cigar. Suit pulls a fake mustache and sticks it to Mitch's face. Mitch wiggles the cigar.
Well, I've heard of clubbing seals, but never seals clubbing!
- MITCH hands the get-up back over to SUIT, who puts the cigar, still lit, in his pant's pocket and the mustache in his breast pocket. Mitch walks over to FISH LADY. Suit slaps the pocket where he put the cigar repetitively.
What's wrong? Too hot for you?
- SUIT starts flailing around frantically.
Well, if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen!
Dahling, what's wrong with your strange friend?
Oh, he's just layin' his moves down.
- SUIT starts manically running(?) about. He eventually catches fire.
... Oh. Yikes.
You know, I predicted this.
Why didn't you tell us!?
You have to pay.
Is there any other way I can pay?
- MITCH winks.
... N-no.
Oh. Well, I'll have to pay the conventional way, then. Suit!
- Gold coins begin pouring out of SUIT'S breast pocket.
How did he...?
He's a small wonder.
- SUIT's tie turns to a shade of red.
Oh, don't be so coy, Suit!
50... 60... yep, that covers it! Thanks, hon. Alright, here's your psychic...thing: your world is an illusion!
WHAT!?
It's true! We're all the subconscious of some "dreamer", and we're all gonna die when they wake up!
Well, that's simply unacceptable! Where can we find the dreamer?
You can find him where the story grows stronger!
Well, Suit, it looks like we are going on a road trip!
- SUIT stops being on fire, gets up, and dusts himself off.
