Zarel Emails/24

Zarel E-Mail #24

In his last ditch attempts to find a computer, Zarel goes to an unlikely person for the checking of his mail.

Cast (in order of appearance): Strong Bad, Zarel, Strong Mad, Marzipan, Homestar Runner, Le'raz

Places: Strong Bad's Basement, Strong Mad's Room, Marzipan's Kitchen

Transcript

{Cut to Strong Bad's Basement, Strong Bad is slumped on the couch, Zarel is on the floor, and there are several Cold Ones and bags of chips scattered about}

ZAREL: I'm really out of options here. Sure I can't use the Block again?

STRONG BAD: Look here, Coach Not Z. If you want a computer, go ask my brother.

ZAREL: Strong Sad has an email show?

STRONG BAD: What? No! Strong Sad says he's too "cool" for computers, and that computers are "too mainstream."

ZAREL: So...Strong Mad has one then?

STRONG BAD: No, but he has a computer, or at least that's what he calls it.

ZAREL: Really...I mean really?

{Cut to Strong Mad's Room, Zarel is looking at the bag and box.}

ZAREL: ...you're serious?

STRONG MAD: ADD ME TO YOUR BUDDY LIST!

ZAREL: How am I supposed to work this thing... {looks down, there's a "keyboard" that's essentially a piece of paper} Oh well, guess I could pretend I'm typin-

{As Zarel types, words appear on the screen}

(shot of Zarel and Strong Mad's faces, Zarel is in utter shock}

STRONG MAD: GET ON WITH IT!

ZAREL: What...but...haba...jabadja...

subj: YO!

Zarel,
Do you like to make cookies? If so, then what are
the ingredients.
-Mathew McFreely

ZAREL: {typing} Good question, Math Major. I've never actually baked. But you know...if you'd like to make cookies yourself, you could...you know...Google the recipe yourself. Lazy crap. {clears the screen} But I guess that there's always a first time for everything, and in this case, it's cookie bake time.

{Cut to Marzipan's kitchen}

MARZIPAN: Are you sure you're not going to blow up my kitchen in the process?

ZAREL: Noooooo...but who says I will?

MARZIPAN: Remember the time you did chemistry?

ZAREL: Uh...I think I'll go now. {leaves}

MARZIPAN: That's what I thought.

HOMESTAR: {offscreen} Oh Marzipan...I could help you bake some cookie delights.

{Marzipan jumps in fright and runs off}

{Cut back to the bag and box}

ZAREL: {typing} Well, that's that. Due to past events, Marzipan has banned me from her kitchen..."just to be safe" apparently. Let's see if there's anything else I can answer.

subj: I'm leraz, your LLC!

oh hi! I'm yo long lost cousin, leraz! hey-!
what is yo name again, man? zarl?
I think it's zarl. love, leraz.

ZAREL: {typing} What? I don't remember any cousins...especially ones with my name backwards! You don't exist!

VOICE: {offscreen} Yes, I do!

{zoom out to see a purple dragon like Zarel standing next to him, he is hunched over and wearing a lime green polo shirt and torn khaki pants, as well as sandals.}

ZAREL: {jumps out of surprise} GAH! Who the heck are you?

LE'RAZ: I'm Le'Raz, your L.L.C.! Y'know, from Historic Over There!

ZAREL: Yeah, I don't know you, get out.

LE'RAZ: Oh... {shuffles off}

{The Paper comes down}

ZAREL: Homeschool, I swear, if you complain this time...

Fun Facts

• Huh. Really nothing this time.