Records Of Bell/Records/22

Summary

Don Skull starts a controversial radio show.

Cast: Im a bell, Sarah, Mature Bling, Tracy, Don Skull, Howard Stern, Hugh Hefner, Harvey Birdman, Yog Sothoth Bellstrom, Bailiff, Foghorn Leghorn, Jury Member

Places: Bling's Living Room, Radio Station, Courtroom

Episode Information: 404-Soundboards Make the Dumbest of Jokes Seem Like Comedy Gold

Insult: random foreshadowing

Credit Joke: The Brothers Chaps

Transcript

{open to Bling's living room. Bell is sitting on the couch}

IM A BELL:{humming Tetris Type A} ...Huh? Oh. Umm... There's no cold open this time. ...G-go away.

{cue theme song, cut back to the living room. Everyone is there except for Don Skull}

IM A BELL: ...Hey, you know what would be fun?

SARAH: What?

IM A BELL: If we all-

DON SKULL:{drives in} HEY, GUESS WHAT!

MATURE BLING: ...What?

DON SKULL: I'm gonna host a radio talk show!

TRACY: ...So?

DON SKULL: Well, isn't that great?

TRACY: ...No. This episode is likely being to as horrible as The Cleveland Show was, before it was canceled five minutes into the premiere.

DON SKULL: What makes you say that?

TRACY: Cleveland was the least popular main character on Family Guy, and likely so are you.

DON SKULL: ...Don't you even want to know what it's called?

MATURE BLING: Sure. Amuse us.

DON SKULL: Skull In The Morning.

{OOC: Yeah, I see wut u did thar, SkullB}

MATURE BLING: ...That's about the most BORING name for a radio show I've EVER HEARD.

DON SKULL: Quiet, you. Anyways, I need someone to help with reading the news. I was thinking Sarah.

SARAH: ...Why me?

DON SKULL: Why do you think?

SARAH: ...It's radio, dumbass.

DON SKULL: ...What's your point?

SARAH: I-Nevermind.

{cut to a radio station. Don Skull is doing the show}

SARAH:{offscreen, pissed} This just in, Don Skull is a idiotic pervert with a heart of black.

DON SKULL: Oh yeah? Well Sarah, YOU are a- {long bleep}

{pan over to Sarah}

SARAH: ...I QUIT. {walks off}

DON SKULL: Screw you, ya {bleep}!

SARAH:{offscreen} Shut up!

{cut to the next day}

DON SKULL: Hey, welcome to Skull In The Morning! Today we have two people here who I consider the two greatest living m-

{cut to Sarah, listening to the broadcast and holding a cup of coffee}

DON SKULL:{from radio} -en here on Terra...

SARAH:{takes a sip of coffee}

DON SKULL:{from radio} ...Howard Stern and Hugh Hefner!

SARAH:{cue spit take}

{OOC: Yeah, apparently those two are still alive after a few hundred years. Oh, and, don't say anything about factual errors involving Howard Stern. Don Skull is not going to be a clone of Don Imus in this episode.}

{cut back to the station}

HOWARD STERN: Hey, it's nice to be here.

HUGH HEFNER: Yeah, I love Skull In The Morning.

DON SKULL: Hey, thanks! And, I see Hugh has brought two beautiful ladies with him!

HUGH HEFNER: It's too bad this is radio.

DON SKULL: Huh? Why?

HUGH HEFNER: ??? {looks at Howard}

HOWARD STERN:{to Hugh} Just ignore it.

HUGH HEFNER: 'Kay.

DON SKULL: Anyways, what do you think of my theory that-

{cut back to Sarah. Now she has no drink, and Bell is there}

DON SKULL:{from radio} -if you two fused, you would form a being greater and more powerful than God and Chuck Norris combined?

SARAH:{spit take on Bell}

IM A BELL:{notices Sarah has no drink} ...Ew.

{cut back to the station}

HOWARD STERN: In my personal opinion, I think you're a brain-dead marionette puppet.

DON SKULL: Well, technically that's true. I'm manmade, and have no brain. ...Er, wait. Was that a compliment?

HUGH HEFNER: ...You are the most SEXIST, STUPID, AND IGNORANT PIECE OF JUNK THAT HAS EVER EXISTED!

HOWARD STERN:{wide eyes} ...

DON SKULL: And this is coming from HUGH HEFNER! {presses a button}

{canned laughter}

HUGH HEFNER: ...God, I hate you. C'mon, girls. {walks out with the two women he brought} C'mon, Howard!

HOWARD STERN: Right! {follows Hugh}

DON SKULL: ...Crap. Um... Well, that's it for today's show. Bye...

{cue montage of Don Skull yelling at random people on his show. He appears to be getting drunker and drunker. Finally, this happens}

DON SKULL:{to a woman} YOU, sir, are a member of the endangered species of lagomorph called the-{falls over}

{OOC: I dare ya to guess what he was going to call her!}

{record scratch. Cut to a courtroom. One one side, there is Harvey Birdman and Don Skull. On the other, there is Sarah and Im a bell}

IM A BELL: Hey, Sarah? Who'd you get as our lawyer?

SARAH: Don't worry.

{the courtroom door opens. A man walks out, but is obscured by shadows}

IM A BELL: ...You got HIM as our lawyer?!

SARAH: Yeah. Is there a problem?

IM A BELL: YES there's a problem! He's-

{camera spins around to show the shadowed lawyer. Light hits him, revealing he is Yog Sothoth Bellstrom}

IM A BELL:{offscreen} -my older brother.

YOG: So, who am I-

SARAH: Us!

YOG: Huh? Oh. Okay-{sees Bell, is amused} You? On the PLAINTIFF'S side? Please tell me this is a joke.

SARAH: No. We're trying to shut down a rather adult radio show.

YOG: ... {laughing} Okay, this HAS to be a prank! Where are the hidden cameras?

SARAH: What's so funny?

YOG: Bell is the biggest pervert I have ever known! And that's kinda creepy coming from his brother. Why would he be trying to-

IM A BELL: One; She's my wife. Two; He insulted her on air.

YOG: ...Okay, okay, this has gone FAR enough. Bell couldn't get a girl if his life depended on it!

IM A BELL: What about my-

YOG: That was an accident! besides, she died less than a year after you married her! But seriously, this is just stupid. This is obviously a joke. I'm outta here.

IM A BELL: ...IT'S NOT A {BLEEP}ING JOKE, JACKASS.

YOG: ...Oh. Umm... Sorry about that.

IM A BELL: Shut up and sit down.

YOG: ...Right. {sits down}

BAILIFF: All rise.

{everybody stands up}

BAILIFF: Honorable Judge Leghorn presiding.

{Foghorn Leghorn walks in wearing a robe and sits down in the bench}

FOGHORN: Y'all may be seated.

{everyone sits down}

FOGHORN: So, what's yer problem?

SARAH: Your honor, my husband and I are trying to shut down a radio show. Skull In The Morning.

FOGHORN: Skull'n The Mornin'? I LIKE that!

SARAH: ...This is gonna be a LONG case...

{cut to a few hours later}

FOGHORN: Has that there jury reached a verdict?

JURY MEMBER: We have your honor. We find the defendant... Guilty.

FOGHORN: Hrm... Well, as much as it pains me to say this, Skull'n The Mornin' must be canceled immediately. {bangs gavel}

SARAH: We did it! WE DID IT! HAHA!

YOG: Yes. Yes we did.

IM A BELL: Well, congratulations, brother. You've earned my respect. For the next few minutes at least.

DON SKULL:{sighs, drives out}

{fade to black. cue credits}