Wikihood/eps/13

Transcript

{Open to the kitchen interior of a cozy house located on the coast of a small Norwegian town in the winter time. Playing on the radio is Baby I Love Your Way, by Big Mountain. A young and attractive blonde woman hums along to the song as she stands at the counter and chopping carrots to put into a stew. Watching her is a blond toddler with red eyes who is sitting in a high chair and giggling. The woman puts the carrots in the stew and stirs it lightly. She takes the ladle out and sips it.}

BLONDE WOMAN: Hmm...

{She savors the taste for a couple of seconds before walking up to the toddler. She holds the spoon up to him as he giggles further.}

BLONDE WOMAN: What do you think, Felix? Is mommy cooking this right?

{Young Felix takes a small sip from the spoon before knocking it from his mother's hand. He continues to giggle. His mother softly laughs to herself as she puts her hands to her hips.}

LOTTA: You're right. It's missing something.

{Lotta looks down at the mess on the floor. She points to the pantry door and flicks her wrist, opening it from a distance. She then makes a gesturing motion with her hand. A mop flies out of the pantry and she catches it before proceeding to clean up the mess. She picks the spoon up and puts it in the sink which is full of water. Felix, who has stopped giggling, looks at the sink with a curious look upon his face. He proceeds to make the same motion with his hand as his mother did. Suddenly, the water from the sink begins to splash. Lotta turns around to face her son.}

LOTTA: Oh, Felix! Don't do that, you're going to make a-...

{Felix suddenly raises his hand in the air, causing the water to shoot out of the sink and splash his mother entirely. She drops the mop and looks at her wet clothing. At first, she appears annoyed, but as Felix begins to giggle again, her expression turns into one of happiness as she crouches down and ruffles his hair.}

LOTTA: You little troublemaker, you. Look at you. Barely a year old, and you're already shaping up to be a powerful little wizard! You're going to be strong, just like your daddy!

{The doorbell rings.}

LOTTA: Speak of the devil! Hold on, darling!

{Lotta rushes to the front door. As she's about to open it, the scene ends. Cut to Chaos being splashed with water as he's hanging upside down from a chain in a dark and murky warehouse located in the Industrial District. Standing in front of him is Andre DuTempi, who is surrounded by cockroaches who are climbing over him and under his body, and Giuliano, who is holding a metal bucket while keeping his distance from DuTempi's bugs.}

ANDRE: So you're the son of a bitch who's been causin' trouble around this town, huh?

CHAOS: I'm sorry, I can't hear you. The sound of blood rushing to my head is making it hard to hear your bullshit.

{DuTempi chuckles to himself before he smacks Chaos in the face.}

CHAOS: Ow, fuck you.

{DuTempi touches Chaos' cheek. A cockroach crawls from under his shirt sleeve and onto Chaos' face, causing him to wince.}

CHAOS: Ew, EW EW EW, FUCK EW, EW EW EW EW, FUCK!!!

{Chaos shakes the cockroach off. DuTempi looks at Giuliano and snaps his fingers. Giuliano runs off-screen and quickly returns with a chair, which he places behind DuTempi. DuTempi sits down, putting him at face-level with Chaos.}

ANDRE: Let's make this easy, I got shit t'do. What did ya do with the money?

CHAOS: I have no idea what the fuck you're talking about. How 'bout I ask you a question. Ever heard of breath mints?

{DuTempi motions to Giuliano, who punches Chaos in the face, causing him to spit blood.}

ANDRE: Don't bullshit me, kid. The money from the fundraiser. I know it was you. Where. Is. It?

CHAOS: Why do you care? I ain't ever seen you before in my life.

ANDRE: I care because you upset a good friend of mine. A friend who is much nastier than I am. I'm givin' you a good deal, kid. Tell me where the money is, and I'll make sure ya death is quick and painless. I'll even send 'yer beloved a bouquet of flowers to put on your grave.

{An image of Noelle flashes in Chaos' mind as DuTempi mentions his "beloved."}

CHAOS: Heh. You wanna know where the money is? I'll tell ya. C'mon, I'll whisper it to you.

ANDRE: What? Ya don't want this bozo t'know?

{DuTempi motions to Giuliano, who's picking his nose.}

ANDRE: Heh, suit yourself. I'm all ears.

{DuTempi stands up and puts his ear to Chaos' face. Chaos leans his head forward and bites DuTempi's ear. He gnaws on it as DuTempi yells in pain.}

ANDRE: YOU DIRTY MOTHERFUCKER, YOU PIECE OF FUCKIN' SHIT, FUCK YOU!!

GIULIANO: Hold on, boss!

{Giuliano punches Chaos in the face, forcing him to let DuTempi out of his grasp. DuTempi holds his bleeding ear as Chaos smiles maliciously at him.}

CHAOS: Hah. Go fuck yourself.

ANDRE: THAT'S IT. I'M THROUGH PLAYIN' NICE WITH YOU. XAVIER TOLD ME NOT T'KILL YA, BUT WHEN I'M DONE WITH YA, YA WILL WISH YA WERE DEAD!! Giuliano, fetch the power drill!

GIULIANO: Right-eo!

{Giuliano runs off-screen and returns with cordless drill. He hands it to DuTempi, who revs it up and grins.}

ANDRE: When I was a kid, m'old man wanted me to make somethin' of myself in a legit way. He didn't want me to be a gangster like 'im, and he certainly did not want me usin' magic, so he sent me to dental school. So I-

CHAOS: And here you are, having done a shit job at all three. Well done, bozo.

{DuTempi frowns.}

DUTEMPI: God, you really piss me the fuck off. Let's do this. Open wide, asshole.

{DuTempi motions to Giuliano who grabs Chaos' face and forces his jaw open. DuTempi goes closer to Chaos, ready to drill his teeth. Cut to Lex and Noelle in the ice-cream truck, navigating a long maze of strip malls, factories, and car dealerships. They drive past a Burger King restaurant.}

LEX: Is it me, or does this area have a lot of Burger Kings?

NOELLE: No, I'm pretty sure that's the same one we've driven past five times at this point. I can't believe you lost him!

LEX: It's not my fault we got stuck in traffic!

NOELLE: It is when you stopped to get Burger King in the first place!

{Zoom out to reveal that they both have Burger King meals on their laps. Noelle picks up a french fry and eats it.}

NOELLE: Not that I don't appreciate you buying me lunch, but y'know, priorities!

LEX: Hey, hey. Don'tcha worry. I can figure this out.

{Lex pulls out his cell phone, which is revealed to be a 1980s-style brick phone. He dials a few numbers and puts it on speakerphone. Headwiz answers.}

HEADWIZ: Uh... hello?

LEX: Yo, Headwiiiiiz!

{Headwiz answers with an awkward and embarassed tone.}

HEADWIZ: O-oh, Lex. C-can you like, phone back a bit later? This is really not a good time.

{Whipping sounds can be heard in the background. Headwiz yelps. She muffles the phone as she chastizes a stranger on the other end.}

HEADWIZ: Ow, I'm on the fuckin' phone!

MYSTERY WOMAN: Sorry babe.

{Noelle awkwardly looks through the window. Headwiz unmuffles the phone.}

HEADWIZ: Like I said, really, really, REALLY bad time.

LEX: It's Chaos, mon. E's gone missin'.

HEADWIZ: Why the fuck should I care? It's not like he doesn't get himself deep in dumb shit all the time anyway.

LEX: Yah, but this time 'e's been kidnapped by cockroach gangsters. I'was 'opin that you'd be able to track his location with that computer stuff ya do.

{Whispering sounds on the other end before Headwiz comes back. She sighs.}

HEADWIZ: Ugh, fine. But you fucking owe me for this.

LEX: Eyyyy! Thanks Wiz, you are a true friend!

HEADWIZ: Yeah, yeah, you fucking know it. Now give me a couple'a minutes.

{Headwiz hangs up. Lex turns to Noelle with glee.}

LEX: See? Told ya I could handle it.

{Noelle is entirely red.}

NOELLE: ...Yeah.