Life with that Cow/Episode 1: Meet your mates

{The people walk on up to the mansion to be greeted by Cow}

COW: Welcome! Come on in!

{They walk in}

COW: Okay, in this mansion, there is one bedroom, my bedroom. Where do you sleep? On the tiled floor of the living room. Funny, huh?

LEMON: Damn!

IM A BELL: I call the rug in front of the fire!

BADSTAR: Can I at least sleep under your bed?

COW: Okay, but my room has tile too. Now, time for a tour. There are 4 bathrooms, a game room with poker and pool, a kitchen full of food and Juicy Juice, a TV room, 2 offices, a room full of cats, dogs, birds, and a small shark in an aquarium, an indoor pool, a beer pong/party room, and a crystal-filled room.

IM A BELL: I suggest you change your mind, Cow. There's no telling what he'd be doing sleeping in the same room as you.

COW: No, my underbed is guarded by iron. Oh, and did I mention I had a controller that makes disasters? One button releases a ghost of a serial killer that will kill of a contestant, one makes a mass power outage, one releases a cold virus that can't infect me... Cause I'm from space. So, go on now, have fun.

IM A BELL: It's not the underbed I'm worried about...

COW:... Whatever. Don't make me use a disaster.

IM A BELL: You'll probably have to. ...Wait. Badstar, did you bring your Haruhi bodypillow?

BADSTAR: {In a sexy-ish tone of voice} Ahhh yeah.

IM A BELL: Okay then. Nevermind, Cow, you're safe.

COW: Oh, do you have a Mikuru bodypillow? I would love one of those...

BADSTAR: MIKURUS A SLUT

COW: No way, I think Mikuru is hot.

IM A BELL: Actually no, no I don't. However, I do have a few Tsuruya bodypillows...

{OOC: Oh wait a minute. I thought CP's character was a girl. WHOOPS THIS CONVERSATION JUST BECAME A WHOLE LOT WORSE}

{OOC: CP is a man.}

COW: Oh, I can work with that.

{OOC: Exactly. I thought he was female, and Badstar sleeping in the same room with a girl would be a bad idea, if you know what I mean.}

IM A BELL: Right. Unfortunately, since there are these cameras here, I can't give it to you now.

COW: Oh... Oh, and just for the heck of it, I'll release a cold virus that can't infect me. This will be fun... {Presses a button on the disaster remote}

IM A BELL: FUNTIME! ACK- {turns green and shrivels up into something resembling a raisin}

COW: Haha... Now you're sick!

{the raisin transforms into a large, purple snake and slithers off}

COW: ... Does that happen when you have a cold?

{the snake slithers back in. A zipper appears on its back and opens, revealing Bell inside}

IM A BELL:{stands up} No, not really. Say, what kind of virus is this, anyway?

COW: Just a cold, man. Just that.

IM A BELL: ...Really? Oookay then.

COW: Now... Dining time! {Goes to the kitchen. A few minutes later, he throws stale buiscets, raw meat, and Juicy Juice at everyone.

IM A BELL:{grows large fangs, eats the raw meat}

COW: I'm bored. Disaster time. {Cow presses a button. He gets inside a bubble. The room floods.

IM A BELL: I WISH I WISH I WISH I WAS A FISH {transforms into a large fish}

{Cow presses a button, which releases a shark}

FISH-BELL: I'M A MURDERER {transforms into a killer whale}

COW: {Room unfloods} Okay. Now, go on!

WHALE-BELL: ACK I'M DRYING UP {explodes. The normal Bell walks out of the destroyed whale carcass}

COW: Please not I am not out of my ball. {Cow turns on heaters inside the ball and presses a button. There is a blizzard.}

IM A BELL: ICED TEA {transforms into a yeti}