Ert Plus Emails/2

About

Ert gets dramatical.

Cast: Ert Plus, Caity, Mac

Places: Ert's Room, The Living Room

Date: February 1st, 2009

Transcript

{Cut to the Ertster. Ert opens his email folder}

ERT: Well then, Mr. Email. It seems that you've been checked!

{Ert brings up the email and reads it aloud}

Dear Ertapus,

Why not switch from corny humor to drama?
From,
Mhuck Forris

ERT: {Typing} Drama, huh? That's quite an interesting idea...

{Ert stops typing and gets up from his seat. Cut to a full view of the room}

ERT: If we were to change the angle of this show to drama instead of our usual brand of corny comedy, it could result in either a brilliant boost of appeal or a horrific wave of extreme failure.

{Caity enters with a tray of cookies}

CAITY: Hey, Ert. I made cookies, but it's only a matter of time before Mac smells them, so eat some quick.

ERT: No thanks, sweetie. I need to remove comedic segways from this episode. I'm trying a new thing. {Takes out a ray gun from nowhere and shoots the tray of cookies. They explode as Caity jumps back in fear}

CAITY: What the hell, Ert?!

ERT: {Looking at ray gun} What? Crap! {Throws away the gun} Okay, let's try this again...

{Mac runs in}

MAC: Where are they?

ERT: Where are what?

MAC: Don't play me with me!

CAITY: You mean dumb?

MAC: Yes. Yes I do.

ERT: Stop it! Dramas can't be funny!

{Caity and Mac both look at him funny}

CAITY & MAC: Dramas?

ERT: I got an email that told me maybe we should switch from ridiculous corny humor to-

{Mac pulls out an ear of corn}

CAITY: {Turns to Mac and puts hand on corn} No, Mac. Not now.

{Mac lowers the corn}

ERT: Seriously. Let's try this. For me?

CAITY: Well... I dunno, Ert. Even I, who is obviously the most intelligent of this trio, enjoy our comedic shticks.

MAC: HEY! You can't say that word on this Wiki place! It's bannnnnnnnnnnnnnned......

CAITY: I said shtick. You know? Gimmick?

MAC: Asian American is the politically correct term, Caity.

CAITY: What? Mac you're not making sense.

MAC: This is news to you how?

ERT: Guys! Stop it! Seriously try the drama thing just once!

CAITY: Alright. Fine.

MAC: Wait. I need to get the rest of the crazy out of me.

ERT: Okay, but hurry up.

MAC: Stand back.

{Ert and Caity back away as Mac plants his feet firmly on the ground and clenches his jaw. He begins to strain as he "pushes" the crazy out of him. After about five seconds of pushing...he farts}

ERT: Mac!

MAC: Heh heh heh... I went poot!

CAITY: That was disgusting.

MAC: Your face is disgusting!

ERT: Stop it! Ugh this is going nowhere. Look, if you do this for me I'll have Caity make another batch of cookies for you, Mac. And Caity I'll take you out to that fancy restaraunt you've been wanting to go.

CAITY: Okay, I'm in!

MAC: I likes me some cookies. I'll do it!

ERT: Good.

{Cut to Ert's Living Room. Ert, Caity, and Mac are all sitting on the couch. Ert sips a cup of coffee}

ERT: {Putting down the mug} So...You called me?

CAITY: Yes. Mac and I have to tell you something.

ERT: What is it?

MAC: It's about your brother. It seems... well, he's dead.

ERT: What? How did this happen?

CAITY: There was nothing that could stop it. {Puts her hand on his shoulder...area} He protected us from the enemies.

MAC: Yes. He said it was his duty.

{Awkward silence. After about 5 seconds, Mac starts to giggle}

CAITY: What is wrong with you, Mac?

MAC: ...I said duty...

{Mac begins to crack up. Caity slaps her forehead as Ert gets up angrily}

ERT: I can't do this, Mhuck! I'm sorry, but these comedic segways are too much!

MAC: Hey Ert.

ERT: What?

MAC: Duty.

{Ert begins to laugh as Caity gets up and walks away}

{Cut back to the Ertster}

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