(even if you aren't vegan)
Total Drama Wiki Island/2
Overview
The second day begins on the island.
Places
Transcript
CHRIS: Last time on Total Drama Wiki Island...
{Cue scenes of the previous episode}
CHRIS: The campers met, and got aquainted with their teams and cabins. Later on, they faced their first challenge. The Barracuda and Pufferfish went head-to-head in a rock climbing challenge. Fenri and Jerry worked hard to climb the mountain before them, but Lemon tried to take the easy way out. This, shockingly, got Noelle angry, and made the Pufferfish fight with each other. Lemon was knocked off the mountain many times, eventually leading to him being knocked off of the island, when he was voted off of his team. The Barracuda had celebrated sweet victory with a dinner at the mountaintop, and a nice toast to Fenri.
{Cut back to Chris}
CHRIS: So, what's in store for our campers? Find out today on TOTAL DRAMA WIKI ISLAND!
{Cue main theme sequence, I'll make one soon}
{Cut to the island (OOC: Now you can talk)}
{Cut to Kirby, who is lying on the ground, sleeping.}
KIRBY: {waking up} Stupid squirrel...
CHWOKA: Secret squirrel?
DOT: {climbing a tree, holding a bird} Why can't this bird fly yet? {puts it in a nest, climbs down}
SEPHIROTH: {Lighting up a cigarette} Because it's dead.
CHAOS: We killed it with our negative influence rays.
JERRY: Another day. And here I was thinking it was all a dream.
SKULLB: Guess you can't take the easy way ouy, huh, Jerry?
JERRY: Hey, what gives, Chris? A toast to Fenri and not me? I did work, too! It's just... it was all off-camera.
{OOC: Sorry about not doing anything in the challenge, my computer was dead.}
{Cut to the stump, the portal rips open further. Cut back.}
CHWOKA: Anyway.
DOT: I dont think the birds dead... Its waddling around the nest.
JERRY: Waddle? ... I think it's a duck. Ducks can't usually fly, you know.
{Outhouse Cam: Jerry}
JERRY: Fun fact! Most domesticated ducks can't fly, save some small species. Perhaps this one is a domesticated duck...?
{dot leaves. in a bit, two burple light combind, shooting out of the cabins. jerry is thrown out of his cabin. zoo and dot leave theirs to see it}
ZOO977: What.
DOT: The.
BOTH: Crap.
FENRI: Sorry about not crediting you, Jerry.
DOT: Is that good or bad?
JERRY: {being tossed around by the aura} More pertinent matters, Fenri. Can somebody help me?
{Jerry is tossed into the outhouse.}
{Outhouse Cam: Jerry}
JERRY: Yeah, this doesn't seem go-
{Cut: outside the outhouse. Jerry is thrown out.}
CHWOKA: Well, uh-
{Chwoka flies out of the cabin and hits himself in the head}
CHWOKA 1: Damn it, someone messed up the timeline by moving things onto the main action page!
CHWOKA 2: What?
{Cut to the portal. It opens even larger.}
{cuts back. the papers apparently have joined. then, zoo's hat, dots hair, kirby, chaos's hair, chwoka's hair, sepiroths hand, jerry's shirt, and the duck all wave toward the papers.}
JERRY: ... Damnit, Zoo! This is all your fault!
ZOO977: I didn't even know this would start! {leaves, comes out with papers and pencils} Help me out here! We need to create the opposite of the symbols!
CHWOKA 2: No, screw you. This is the stupidest plot point I have ever seen you come up with.
CHWOKA 1: What is?
CHWOKA 2: Oh, Dot and Zoo draw a series of symbols ACCIDENTALLY while DRAWING while HOLDING PENCIL TO PAPER AND NOT LIFTING UP and somehow, these symbols are MAGIC even though it's GRAPHITE on WOOD PULP!
CHWOKA 1: Is the magatama any stupider?
CHWOKA 2: No, this is.
JERRY: The oppo- the opposite?! That's not going to work at a-
{Jerry notices the portal on the stump.}
JERRY: The portal!
RAGGON: That is the disembowelment spell!
CHRISTOPHER: Chris, just tell us what the challenge is and we'll be done with it.
ZOO977: QUICK! {the two begin drawing symbols. the duck flies into the papers orbit}
{Chwoka 1 rips up the two pieces of paper causing the problem.}
CHWOKA 1: There, non-problem solved. Also, nobody is allowed to use paper and pencil anymore, because they are the tools of satan.
ZOO977: Okay, you can't boss us around.
DOT: You aren't in charge here.
CHAOS: Neither can you with your "Oh I'm going to try a dumb sub-plot involving drawing symbols".
ZOO977: {sighs} I didn't mean for it to happen. {jumps into the lake}
DOT: I'm confused. {walks to the cabin}
JERRY: Chwokas! It's the time portal!
{Chwoka 1 and 2 drag Zoo out of the lake}
CHWOKA 1: Your character didn't-
CHWOKA 2: -but the writer did!
CHWOKA 1: And, being the self-insertion,
CHWOKA 2: The best we can do is beat up you.
CHWOKA 1: So step up one and all to beat up Zoo!
JERRY: ... This is extremely confusing.
{Chwoka 1 hands Zoo off to Chwoka 2.}
CHWOKA 1: As a character, I have no idea what that portal is. The author, however, knows, but is above making me use knowledge I can't know.
JERRY: How wall-breaking.
ZOO977: {worms his way out of chwoka 2's grasp. he runs off.}
JERRY: Run, Forrest, run! {to Chwoka} So, let's examine this here portal, how 'bout?
CHWOKA: Okay, you first.
ZOO977: {running by} MUST GET AWAY! {runs into the lake again}
{Jerry puts a hand into the portal.}
JERRY: Oh! My hair!
{Jerry takes his hand out of the portal.}
{zoo jumps out of the water}
ZOO977: Guys! Guys! Some severed hand coming out of a magic circle tried to grab me!
JERRY: Zoo, you don't understand. This is a time portal. Going back in time.
ZOO977: {looking in the water} Well, its grabbing a dead fish. Is that soft and plushy?
JERRY: Zoo, my hand isn't even in the portal any more. It's probably a swamp creature, okay?
{The duck jumps out of the water, soft and plushy fish in mouth}
JERRY: See? All natural.
ZOO977: Ok! {walks about ten feet, dives into the water}
CHWOKA: Alright, now it's my turn! Soft and plushy land, here I come!
{Chwoka sticks his head in the portal}
{zoo comes up from the water}
ZOO977: I found a rock!
JERRY: But it's not a rock--it's a roooock lobstaaah!
{Pause.}
JERRY: Sorry! Couldn't resist.
{Outhouse Cam: Jerry}
JERRY: I haven't really talked about anything in a while, so I'll say this. Bell, quit parading around with your slag of a wife. So what if you sleep with her? I bet you're just mad because I was married first. And that my wife isn't ugly. Yeah. Let that soak in. Burn.
{Outhouse Cam: Zoo977}
ZOO977: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH! Outhouse filming fight!
{Outhouse Cam:Chaos}
CHAOS: How can it be a burn when it sinks in?
{Outhouse Cam: SkullB}
SKULLB: I thought you were the one with weird powers. I thought you could explain it.
{Outhouse Cam:Chaos}
CHAOS: Let's just keep on doing this until the battery dies.
{Outhouse Cam: Zoo977}
ZOO977: How do we know what everyones saying?
{Outhouse Cam:Chaos}
CHAOS: This place ain't Soundproof.
{Outhouse Cam: Dot}
DOT: Hey guys! Why am I here?
{Outhouse Cam:Raggon}
RAGGON: Shut up Zoo!
{Outhouse Cam: Dot}
DOT: I'm dot.
{Outhouse Cam:Raggon}
RAGGON: I was talking to zoo.
{OOC: No more outhouse cam.}
{cuts back. Zoo prances by in a robin hood costume, playing his flute.}
[Chwoka 1 takes his head out of the portal}
CHWOKA 1: It's a time portal!
JERRY: Yeah, kind of already knew that.
CHWOKA 1: You didn't last time I checked...OHMYGOD I CHANGED THE TIMELINE
JERRY: Well. That sounds bad.
ZOO977: {stops playing his flute} Haldo!
JERRY: Go away, Zoo. We're having a pretty important conversation.
ZOO977: Ok! {prances off, continues playing his flute}
CHWOKA 1: Wait a minute, he can be our first guinea pig for full-body transfers!
ZOO977: {running back, excited} Guinea pigs? Where?!?
CHWOKA 1: Right through this time portal!
ZOO977: WEEE! {goes through the portal}
JERRY: ... What did you do?
CHWOKA 1: Likely, created a mess.
{Chwoka sticks his head through the portal, then takes it out.}
JERRY: Where were you?
{both zoo's are heard yelling which zoo}
JERRY: {to Chwoka} You go pick!
{Jerry shoves Chwoka into the portal. A thud is heard.}
JERRY: ... Oops.
{The portal closes.}
JERRY: Wow, is that unfortunate.
CHWOKA 2: Looks like I'm the only Chwoka now!
{The portal opens back up, Chwoka having caught back up with the present}
CHWOKA: By the way, Jerry, thanks for shoving me through the portal. I almost died.
JERRY: And I fell of the face of a rock cliff. Now you know how I feel.
CHWOKA: Oh, well while you were falling, I was being torn apart by BEARS.
JERRY: Oh. Really? Sorry, man.
{The portal shrinks a bit.}
JERRY: ... What?
CHWOKA: It must be created by paradoxes! Whenever one is solved, it shrinks.
{The portal opens more}
CHWOKA: I guess it's a new paradox..?
{2 Zoos run by in the background.}
CHWOKA: But what is the paradox?
JERRY: No idea.
CHRISTOPER: {off screen}I don't know either, maybe it's the fact I have two tongues, one arm, and three legs! {camera moves to him, shows that that has happened to him}
{Sephiroth gets out a bottle of water, and drinks some, only for his eyes to widen, and his speech becomes faster.}
SEPHIROTH:OKWHOTHOUGHTITWASSMARTTOSLIPCAFFINEINMYDRINK? COMEON! REVEALYOURSELF!
{Outhouse Cam: Sephiroth}
SEPHIROTH: Honestly. I am the butt of lots of pranks. Was I invited here just to be mocked?! Jeez..
{2 zoo's and dot prance by again. both zoos are playing flutes in robin hood costumes. dot is also in a robin hood costume, but she's playing the clarinet}
JERRY: ... Let's just end this right now, 'kay?
{Jerry walks over to the stump and presses a button marked "PARADOX ELIMINATOR". Everything goes back to normal.}
JERRY: There. Chris should be happy.
SEPHIROTH: ...Wait a minute... YOU FIXED MY CIGARETTE HABIT! YAY! ...I mean, cool. Yeah..
JERRY: Yes. I am a miracle worker.
CHWOKA: So, what now?
SEPHIROTH: Well, I won't be needing these anymore. {Takes out a large bin bag, and gives it to Jerry.} The funny thing is, I've only been addicted for 1 week.
{Outhouse cam: Im a bell}
IM A BELL: Jerry, the only reason my wife is ugly is because the real-life me can't draw female faces and is too stupid to think of tracing a face from his collection of Shonen Jump back issues. Oh, and, sorry about that Casey not sleeping with you comment. I just realized it would be a little uncomfortable with Skully in your house.
{cuts back}
ZOO977: Aw... I liked other me.
{Outhouse Cam: Jerry}
JERRY: Ahahaha you have no idea.
{cuts back}
SKULLB: Wow. Without wacky shenanigans it's kinda boring.
DOT: Ok! {takes out a ton of buble gun, climbs up the mountain}
{Cuts to Sqauwkers flying Badstar over the forest}
BADSTAR: FASTER, FASTER!!! WHEEE!!!!
SQAUWKERS: SQAUWK!
BADSTAR: What do you mean I'm mistreating you?
SQAUWKERS: SQWAUKITY SQUAWK SQAUWK!
BADSTAR: What!? NO! DON'T!
SQAUWKERS: {Drops Badstar. Badstar lands in the forest.}
BADSTAR: {Slowly gets up} I think I'm okay... huh... I haven't seen this part of the forest before... I must be lost... {Walks off}
{cuts back, dot is making a giant ball of buble gum.}
DOT: Almost finished!
{zoo walks by, rolling a barrel of cream cheese.}
ZOO977: I wonder where I bought this.
{Cut back to Badstar. Badstar is on his knees, exhausted.}
BADSTAR: Oh my god... I've been walking for 5 minutes... I'm so tired! I'll never make it out of here!
{zoo walks in, pushing the cream cheese}
ZOO977: Hi!
BADSTAR: ZOO! Do you know how I can get out of here?
ZOO977: Follow the red-brown dirt road! {points to a path the barrel is making. begins rolling the barrel away, begins whistling. he trips, and chrashes the sides of the barrel in, falling in it himself} Ow.
{A few minutes later...}
BADSTAR: {Runs out of forest} SWEET FREEDOM!!!
