The Skype Squad/1

JCM moves to Skype City, and the gang splits in two.

Transcript

{The students of the Homestar Runner Fanstuff School are crowded in front of It's dot com as he prepares to make an announcement, standing where the HRFSchool once stood.}

IT'S DOT COM: I'm sorry it had to come to this, but I will not be rebuilding the Homestar Runner Fanstuff School. It will be shutting down, for good this time.

{The students boo.}

IT'S DOT COM: Oh, please. I think we all knew this would happen. All the purge did was postpone the inevitable. Let's face it: a school about Homestar Runner fanstuff is a stupid fucking idea.

JCM: {whispers} Did he just swear?

IT'S DOT COM: Now, if you excuse me, I'm going back to running a real school. A good school. A school that has 10, 15 years left in its engine. Goodbye.

{It's dot com walks to the Homestar Runner School with his head held high. Three years later, the Homestar Runner School has a "Closed" sign in front of it.}

{Cut to the Skype City Airport. JCM walks off a plane, and once he enters the building, he gets patted down by Raiku.}

JCM: Raiku? Are you with the TSA?

RAIKU: No, I just like groping people.

{Sephiroth and Strong Intelligent come out of an airport restaurant with a fish and fries dish.}

STRONG INTELLIGENT: These fish and chips are excellent.

SEPHIROTH: JCM, you made it!

JCM: I did! And I see that Strong Intelligent stills calls french fries "chips". What a silly man.

STRONG INTELLIGENT: I see you haven't changed at all.

JCM: Man, I can't believe it's been three years since we all last saw each other.

RAIKU: Why did you guys leave the School Student School, anyways? I know why I did.

SEPHIROTH: You were expelled.

RAIKU: I was expelled. Good times, good times.

SEPHIROTH: We left the School Student School because it reminded us too much of the HRFSchool, and knowing that the latter would never come back was just too much to bear. So, we went our separate ways.

STRONG INTELLIGENT: But now we're back together again, finally!

{Lemon Demon43 comes out of the same restaurant Sephiroth and Strong Intelligent came out of.}

LEMON DEMON43: Who the fuck invited Raiku?

RAIKU: Why the sour 'tude, Lemon?

LEMON DEMON43: Quit it with the puns!

RAIKU: What, are you afraid of a bit of ribbing? Don't be yellow!

LEMON DEMON43: Grr!

{Chaosvii7 comes out of the restaurant with a drink.}

CHAOSVII7: Did I miss something?

STRONG INTELLIGENT: {eats a fry} No, not really.

LEMON DEMON43: As long as Raiku's in this group, I don't want anything to do with it!

SEPHIROTH: Oh, come on! Don't split up the gang already!

JCM: There's a gang? Is this like the Scooby Gang or what?

LEMON DEMON43: My decision is final. Whoever wants to join me can join me.

STRONG INTELLIGENT: I'll join if we call it the SI gang!

{Sephiroth gives Strong Intelligent the evil eye.}

STRONG INTELLIGENT: Come on! I've never had my own gang before!

LEMON DEMON43: Anybody else want to join? Maybe someone else whose name starts with "s"?

SEPHIROTH: Nuh-uh! There is no way I'm taking sides! I'll be a neutral party, kind of like Switzerland.

JCM: Nobody understands your obscure historical references, Sephiroth!

STRONG INTELLIGENT: I understood it.

CHAOSVII7: So did I.

RAIKu; You're just not very smart, JCM.

JCM: Coming from the guy who flunked out of school!

RAIKU: I didn't flunk out. I got expelled for raising Super Sam's boxers on the flagpole. Good times.

LEMON DEMON43: We're going off-topic. Who's in Raiku's gang and who's in SI's gang?

CHAOSVII7: I'm in Raiku's gang. She throws the best parties.

JCM: I'm in neither. I'll be Sweden like Sephiroth.

SEPHIROTH: I said Switzerland, but Sweden works as well.

LEMON DEMON43: Fine! Let's go, Strong Intelligent!

STRONG INTELLIGENT: Hey, I give the orders! Let's go, Lemon!

{Lemon Demon43 and Strong Intelligent walk out of the airport.}

SEPHIROTH: Oh, no! He left with the fish and chips!

JCM: Sephiroth! Not you, too!

{The End}