Difference between revisions of "Wikihood/eps/Dracula"

Latest revision as of 02:45, 1 October 2021

Summary

Welcome to the Symphony of Horror!

An adaptation of Dracula, by Bram Stoker.

Starring:

• Felix "Chaos" Zabat as Jonathan Harker
• Noelle Andromeda as Mina Harker
• Stephanie Young as Lucy Westenra"
• Leigh More as Dr. Abraham Van Helsing
• Garfield Wiggins as R. M. Renfield
• Konstantin Volkov as Quincey Morris
• "Headwiz" as John Seward
• Tracy Bellucci as Arthur Holmwood
• and Lex as Count Dracula

Transcript

NARRATOR: Sing to me muse, of the man of many ways, who was driven far beyond his home after he had sacked Troy's citadel! Many were of the cities he-...

{Whispering sounds}

NARRATOR: What do you mean this is the wrong script? Oh? Oh, we're doing Dracula? Really? Ugh, fine.

{The narrator clears his throat. Open to the foggy streets of Victorian London. A well-groomed young man steps out of a carriage and dusts off his clothes.}

NARRATOR: London, England. 1897. Meet Felix Harker, a newly graduated law student set to begin a career as a solicitor, and a young man slated to marry the love of his life, the lovely Noelle Harker. Days after his graduation, he has already been given his first task by the esteemed real estate agent, R. M. Garfield.

{Felix walks into the building, named "R. M. Garfield and Associates." It is a small yet cozy place. The walls are lined with bookshelves and stacked piles of paperwork are littered across the floor. As he walks through the doors, a man runs from his desk to greet him.}

GARFIELD: Oh, you must be Felix Harker! Welcome, come in, come in!! Please, take a seat!

{Garfield motions to a seat on the other side of his desk. Felix nods at him and hangs his hat on a nearby rack. He follows Garfield to the desk and takes a seat. Garfield points to a bowl on his desk.}

GARFIELD: Would you like a candy?

FELIX: Oh, yes, thank you!

{Garfield grins at him as he picks up a piece and unwraps it. He pops it into his mouth.}

GARFIELD: If my knowledge serves me correctly, this is your first job, am I correct?

FELIX: Oh, yes! I am a recent graduate of Oxford! I am glad to have received work so quickly!

GARFIELD: How exciting!

{Garfield picks up the bowl of candy and moves it closer to Felix.}

GARFIELD: Another candy?

{Felix furrows his brow.}

FELIX: Uh... sure?

{Garfield chuckles to himself as Felix takes another piece.}

GARFIELD: Have you ever traveled outside of England, my dear Felix?

FELIX: Not yet, I'm afraid. My fiance and I are planning on a honeymoon trip to Paris when we are able to, however.

GARFIELD: Paris, huh? I heard the city is beautiful around this time. How would you feel about a trip to Eastern Europe?

FELIX: I've never thought of the possibility, truth be told. But I am open to it!

GARFIELD: Excellent! You see, I have a... client who wishes to buy some property in this city. A nobleman from Transylvania, named Count Lexcula.

FELIX: What? Surely that's not a real name!

GARFIELD: It is! It's just foreign. It's.. uh... Hungarian?

FELIX: But you said he's from Transylvania!

GARFIELD: This is Victorian England, do you really think any of us care enough about that corner of the world to tell any of those places apart?

FELIX: I guess not?

GARFIELD: Perfect! You see, I can sense it within you. This is an important task, and I trust no one else to do it but you, sir.

FELIX: That's awfully kind of you, Mr. Garfield.

GARFIELD: It will be a long journey, but it will pay delightfully.

FELIX: Where is it?

GARFIELD: It will be a long trip through the Carpathian mountains to his family castle. Do not worry, for I have already arranged for your transport. The Count will be expecting you, so do not worry about that either.

FELIX: Well, thank you, Mr. Garfield.

GARFIELD: It will not be an easy journey. You will sweat a lot, and perhaps even... spill some blood.

FELIX: I am not going to lie, this is triggering all sorts of alarms in my head right now, but law school costs a lot and I am hemorrhaging in debt right now so I can't say no.

{Garfield chuckles.}

GARFIELD: Excellent. I would like you to leave for Transylvania as soon as possible. It would be bad business to let him wait.

FELIX: Very well, if you insist!

GARFIELD: Your transport leaves tomorrow morning. Be sure to get all your affairs in order before then.

{Cut to the Harker household, a small and humble house in the middle of London. Felix is packing his belongings in a suitcase while his fiancee worries.}

NOELLE: I just don't think you should go!

FELIX: Noelle, I will be fine! This is my job now, I'm expected to go on trips like this!

NOELLE: It scares me! What if you are mauled by wolves? Or attacked by bandits? Or haunted by ghosts?

FELIX: Noelle! Don't be silly! I shall be safe. As long as I have your love, nothing can tear the two of us apart!

NOELLE: I don't want you to go! Please, it just feels wrong! I... feel dread... a dark force...

FELIX: Look, do you know how much law school costs? This debt will not pay for itself! Sometimes you just have to step out of your comfort zone, and this is one of those times!

NOELLE: Oh Felix. You better swear to me that you come back safely. Or else I'll-...

FELIX: I will be fine!

{Noelle takes a large breath and exhales.}

NOELLE: I still don't like this, but I trust you.

{Felix wraps his arms around Noelle and embraces her in a hug, which she reciprocates. The camera pans upward as the time flashes forward to the next morning. A small party of wellwishers has gathered outside of the Harker household. Noelle, with tears in her eyes, is waving Felix off as he prepares to step into the carriage. She walks up to him and gives him a pendant.}

NOELLE: Keep this with you at all times so you know that I am always here with you.

FELIX: Thank you, my beloved.

{A wealthy woman steps forward and puts herself between Felix and Noelle. She is Stephanie Westenra, Noelle's friend from childhood.}

STEPHANIE: Don't you worry! I will keep her safe while you are gone!

{Stephanie poses as a gentleman as she bows to Noelle, prompting laughter from the crowd.}

STEPHANIE: Oh, my beloved!

NOELLE: Stop it!

FELIX: Please do take care of her. She is the dearest in the world to me.

{Felix and Noelle hug for one last time before he steps into the carriage. As it leaves, the small crowd cheers for him. Pan upwards to the clear sky.}

NARRATOR: And so the brave Felix Harker endeavoured forward to Transylvania to meet the Count. Little did he know what was in store for him...

{The scenery shifts as the clear blue sky turns into one that is dark and cloudy. Pan downwards to reveal that the carriage has arrived in a murky and gloomy Romani village. Felix steps out of the carriage and immediately falls into a puddle of mud. As he gets up, the carriage speeds off, splashing more mud on his clothing.}

FELIX: Argh, lousy driver! Ugh, I'm all gross now.

{Felix looks up and notices all the nearby villagers staring at him with a mixture of emotions. Some look at him with feelings of contempt, others with pity. He smiles awkwardly and nods to them as he trundles through the mud.}

FELIX: H-hey...

{Nobody answers him. He makes his way to a nearby inn, where all the people inside stare at him just as the villagers outside did. Again, he nods to them as he walks to the innkeeper.}

FELIX: Salutations!

{The innkeeper looks directly at him with a look of deep concern.}

INNKEEPER: What brings you here, traveller?

FELIX: I am on my way to meet with Count Lexcula, but right now I am starving. Give me some of that delicious stew in the back.

{The villagers collectively gasp at the mention of the count. The innkeeper looks even more shocked than before.}

INNKEEPER: You are not thinking of going there, are you?

FELIX: I am! Why?

INNKEEPER: It is not safe! It is a bastion of pure evil. People in this village have gone missing without a trace!

FELIX: Come now. That's... silly. That's just superstition!

{Out of nowhere, an old Romani woman appears next to Felix, causing him to scream in terror.}

FELIX: Sorry! You uh, caught me off guard!

OLD WOMAN: Beware the old castle! Do not go, lest you lose your soul!

FELIX: I have debt to pay off!

{The old woman pulls a crucifix necklace out of her pocket and puts it in Felix's hands.}

OLD WOMAN: I see you are a typical foreigner. Stubborn. Take this. You will need it.

FELIX: Thank you... I appreciate the gift.

OLD WOMAN: Beware his gaze.

{The old woman shuffles off, leaving Felix confused. Cut to the exterior of the inn. It is now raining. The innkeeper hands the reins of one of his horses to Felix in exchange for a small payment of gold.}

INNKEEPER: I beckon you not to go. It is a land of ruin and suffering. You will not leave it alive. It is cursed by the creature... Nosferatu.

{Felix chuckles awkwardly.}

FELIX: Thank you for your concern, but I will be fine!

{The innkeeper shakes his head as walks away.}

INNKEEPER: May God have mercy on you.

{Felix climbs ontop of the horse and rides off into the distance.}

NARRATOR: Valiently fighting against his better judgement, the brave yet foolish Felix continued his journey. After hours of riding through the storm, the traveller from England reached his location. The house of the damned. Castle Lexcula.

{A visibly weary Felix, soaked to the bone, finally makes it to the castle. The structure, once a proud piece of medieval architecture, has been heavily weathered by the elements. A bolt of lightning strikes the castle, spooking the horse. Felix pets it to calm it down, and then ties it to a nearby post. He walks up the magnificent stone staircase and approaches the giant wooden door. He knocks once, and it echoes significantly, with no answer. He knocks a second time, and again, there is no answer. He knocks a third time, and it opens by itself, revealing an empty stone foyer, illuminated by candlelight. He cautiously steps in and closes the door behind him.}

FELIX: Hello? Is anybody home? I would hate to think I was intruding...

{A crack of lightning causes the windows to illuminate the whole building. Suddenly, Felix sees a shadowy figure standing at the top of the staircase.}

FELIX: H-hello?

{The shadowy figure steps forward, revealing himself to be dressed in esquisite, yet antiquated clothing. He is a frail figure, with marble-white skin. His fingers are long and spindly, with sharp nails and hair on his palms. He takes another step, revealing his face. His eyes are red and sunken, yet wide open, and his face resembles a human skull. His ears are slightly pointed, and the hair on his head is so grey and thin that he looks bald at first glance. He looks at Felix and smiles.}

LEXCULA: I am Lexcula. I bid you welcome, Mr. Harker, to my home. Come in, enter freely at your own will.

{Felix steps further into the house. The count quickly moves toward him, as if his feet were floating. He offers his hand to Felix, who shakes it. As he does this, his demeanor changes.}

LEXCULA: Okay! Formalities are out of the way. Thank god for that, it always feels kinda awkward, y'know?

FELIX: What?

LEXCULA: No, I mean, like, me standing up there, all like, "I bid you welcome." It doesn't feel natural! Who talks like that?

FELIX: Nobody... I guess?

LEXCULA: Exactly! Sorry, it's just been a while since I've had guests over. I've been so RESTLESS! Oh man, it is good to have some fresh blood around here!

FELIX: Excuse me, Count Lexcula?

LEXCULA: Please. Just call me Lex. We're friends here. Come on! You must be hungry. Look at you. You're so skinny! God knows what they've been feeding you over there. I'll have my servants cook you a delicious feast. But first, we gotta get you out of those rags. You're soaked to the bone over here. Getting water all over my lovely stone floor!

FELIX: Oh, I'm sorry about that!

{Lexcula laughs.}

LEXCULA: No! I am just kidding! It's good! Let's get you all sorted out. I'm sure we have a lot to talk about!

{Cut to the banquet hall. It is a large and exquisitely decorated room, with a large wooden table in the middle. Felix is sitting at one end, with a lavish feast in front of him. Lexcula is sitting at the seat near him, with nothing but a glass of wine.}

FELIX: Aren't you eating anything?

LEXCULA: Me? Oh no, I'm not really all that hungry. Food doesn't do much for me, y'know?

FELIX: I guess?

LEXCULA: So, you're the one in charge of arranging my trip to London, huh? A pretty nice city I bet?

FELIX: Have you never been? I'd expect a count like you to be very well travelled.

LEXCULA: Oh, I am! I have been around for a long time. Seen some places. Not London though! Not yet!

FELIX: And yet you're buying a property there?

LEXCULA: Sometimes you just need a change of scenary!

FELIX: I'd imagine!

{Lexcula chuckles. Felix picks up a nearby loaf of bread and begins to cut it with his knife. However, he accidentally cuts his thumb, causing it to bleed. Lexcula's eyes widen. Felix is about to wipe the blood away with his handkerchief, but Lexcula grabs his hand.}

LEXCULA: That looks painful. Let me deal with it.

FELIX: I assure you, I'm fine-

{Lexcula growls at Felix and screams in a demonic tone.}

LEXCULA: LET ME DEAL WITH IT!!!

FELIX: Okay, fine!

{Lexcula puts his mouth on Felix's thumb and licks the blood clean. Felix draws his hand back immediately after he finishes. Lexcula calms down.}

LEXCULA: I am so sorry about that! It's just a Transylvanian custom. It's to.. uh... stop blood poisoning. You should be fine now.

{Felix is visibly uneased.}

FELIX: I don't know enough about Transylvanian customs to dispute that, but... I think I have had enough to eat for now. I would like to retire for the night, please.

LEXCULA: Of course! I'll show you to your room!

{Cut to Felix's bedroom in the castle. He is sat at a table, writing in his diary over the candlelight.}

FELIX: Dear Noelle, there is no nearby postal service, so I have decided to write a diary for you instead so that I can preserve all my thoughts and feelings towards you. The castle has an unreal atmosphere. The Count is a peculiar figure indeed. I admit that I have trouble discerning whether this is reality or just a strange dream.

{A scuttling noise emanates from outside of the window. Felix steps from the table and looks out of the window to see Lexcula crawling down the wall of the castle like a lizard, moving from one window into another. Felix steps away, shuts the window, and walks to his bed. He takes a deep breath and sighs.}

FELIX: Just a dream. Just a dream.

{Felix gets into bed and the camera fades to black. Open to the next day. Felix is now in the downstairs library, looking through the countless number of books on the shelves.}

FELIX: Lots of books about England here...

{He pulls out a dusty old book, titled "English Law."}

FELIX: I don't suppose this has been read in years...

{The door opens, and Lexcula enters.}

LEXCULA: Hey buddy! Hope you had a good night's sleep last night!

{Lexcula sees the book in Felix's hand.}

LEXCULA: Oh, I see you have found my collection on England!

FELIX: Yes, it's quite a robust collection. Especially for somebody who has never visited before.

LEXCULA: But I have visited! These books have been good friends to me over the years, and through the hours of pleasure they have given me, I have learned a lot about your beautiful country. I long to walk the streets of London, to breathe the air, to experience the lives of humanity, to share its life... and its death.

FELIX: Huh?

LEXCULA: ...But I only know your tongue through these books.

FELIX: Why, Count, your speech is excellent!

LEXCULA: Thank you! I enjoy talking to you. I must confess, with no company other than my servants, I find myself feeling rather lonely.

FELIX: Yet, you're of such high noble standing.

LEXCULA: Indeed, I am the descendant of an old family. But look at this castle. It has aged, and so have I. Time is an abyss, my friend. Centuries coming and going. Endless, and undying. Death is not an enemy, Felix. Can you imagine? Enduring centuries, and with each day, experiencing the same futilities?

{Lexcula picks a book from a nearby shelf and throws it across the room.}

LEXCULA: It's so boring!

FELIX: I'm sorry to hear that.

LEXCULA: My family used to be a great one. We used to rule over these lands. The region you came through? Why that ground was fought over throughout the centuries! By the Wallachians, the Saxons, the Turks! There is no soil within a thousand miles that has not been stained by the blood of warriors! The Hapsburgs and the Romanovs, so high and mighty in their seats of power, could never compare to us. Many tried to invade us. Many found themselves skewered like a kebab.

FELIX: Like Vlad the Impaler?

LEXCULA: Yes! Like Vlad the Impaler! Somebody who I have absolutely nothing to do with!