Difference between revisions of "Stuntmail/roles"

Latest revision as of 17:40, 1 January 2011

Summary

Crack talks about a few of his work experiences

Cast in order of appearance: Crack Stuntman, Adrian Deathkill, Strong Bad, Tucksworth Caleb Rentpayer, Bubs, A Chimendez
Locations: Crack's Computer Room, The set of Deathkiller 3, Basement of the Brothers Strong, A. Chimendez's Office

Transcript

{open on Crack's computer room, Crack types "Stuntmail.exe"}

CRACK: {rapping} One two three, it's an email rap. I already know it's email crap.

Subject: Your roles

Dear MR. Stuntman,
You've played a lot of different roles over the years.
I was wondering, which one was your most favorite?
Sincerely,

Bub

CRACK: {typing} Well, Bub... Wow that makes me feel mean. I'm gonna change your name to... {moves cursor up the word Bub, and types Bob} Bob.

{Clears screen}

CRACK: {typing} Well, Bob, it is a little known fact that my first roll in show business was as a stunt actor. Although it isn't quite my favorite. It's up there on the list. I will never forget my time being the Stunt Double for Adrian Deathkill in...

{Cut to a movie set, all walls are covered in fake blood, Deathkill stands with two pistols pointed at two generic bad guys.}

CRACK: {voiceover} Deathkill 3! The Rereckonwakening!

DEATHKILL: Tell me where you boss is now and you'll see how good my aim is!

BAD GUY 1: Don't you mean...

DEATHKILL: {yelling} I know what I said!

BAD GUY 2: Well, that doesn't make us want to...

DEATHKILL: {yelling} Do it already! {Points the gun directly at Bad Guy #2's head, The bad guys start to pull out guns of their own}

DIRECTOR: {offscreen} Cut! {pan to Crack, wearing a long black wig} Stuntman! Get in there!

YOUNG CRACK: Yes, sir! {Crack runs on set, Death and pain sounds are heard.}

CRACK: {voiceover} The scene in question is not being seen because of Triple-R rated goodness.

{cut to Strong Bad watching TV in his basement}

CRACK: {voicover} Off of there I got a guest roll on the popular TV Show, Caleb Rentpayer.

TUCKSWORTH: {offscreen} Caleb, you can't just bring handsome tall men here without telling me!

CALEB: {offscreen} Yes I can.

TUCKSWORTH: {offscreen} The neighbors might assume things

CRACK: {offscreen} Who cares?

STRONG BAD: Wow, I hope that guy stays on the show.

{cut back to the Stunty}

CRACK: {typing} My character was killed off at the end of the episode. Then there was my guest star role as Crack StuntBubs

BUBS: {offscreen} That one never happened

{Pan out to reveal Bubs stand right next to Crack}

CRACK: Ahh! Blue face man! What are you doing here? {confused} Who let you in?

BUBS: I let me in, man. You gave me a key so I could check on your computer.

CRACK: I was stupid enough to give someone else a key?

BUBS: Yep!

CRACK: Well the Stunty is working fine. Let me get back to my email now.

{cut back to just the Stunty}

CRACK: {typing} Well, Bob, to finally answer your question, My favorite role ever is my most famous role. Havegunman on Commander Cheats! You should seriously know this already, he's my first fully by me character to have a gun!

{cut to A. Chimendez's office, him hitting his head on his desk.}'

CHIMENDEZ: {on each hit} Why! Can't! He! Ever! Get! It! Right!

{cut back to the Stunty}

CRACK: Now the only question is what the future hold. Will I be Gunnyhave my whole life? {really loud groaning is heard offscreen} Will there be a Crack Stuntman action film? Will I voice a japanese cartoon? Do I even know what questions I am asking at this point? The world may never know.

{stuntpaper}