(even if you aren't vegan)
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Latest revision as of 15:38, 29 March 2009
IVAN DRAGO MEETS CAPTAIN AMERICA
Badstar as Ivan Drago
The Noid as Captain America
{fade in: a lemonade stand. Ivan Drago walks up and sits at the seat, and puts up a sign reading "OPEN"}
IVAN DRAGO: Today is a day to win great cash for Russia.
{Captain America walks by, and stops at the stand.}
IVAN DRAGO: Hello, good sir, would you like to buy some lemon aid?
CAPTAIN AMERICA: Sure, kid. {puts a quarter on the table}
{Ivan gives Captain America a glass of lemonade from under the table}
IVAN DRAGO: Thank you for helping support Russia.
{Captain America spits out his lemonade}
IVAN DRAGO: Too sour?
CAPTAIN AMERICA: RUSKIES?!
IVAN DRAGO: What is wrong with the great Russia?
CAPTAIN AMERICA: Well, for one thing, you have a Godless economic system...
IVAN DRAGO: Like America is any better! You people think you are better then us! You think we are weak. But we are not. It is you who is weak!
CAPTAIN AMERICA: I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of us landing on the moon.
IVAN DRAGO: Well, in Russia, we- ...
{Long moment of silence}
IVAN DRAGO: ... It is you who is weak!
CAPTAIN AMERICA: Listen, Reddie. I don't want to embarass your awful, winter-plagued coutnry any more. Now get along.
IVAN DRAGO: ...I must break you... with lemonade sales!