https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=The_Noid_Has_A_Wooden_HandThe Noid Has A Wooden Hand - Revision history2026-04-15T16:02:24ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.28.2https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?title=The_Noid_Has_A_Wooden_Hand&diff=89417&oldid=prevDinoshaur: Blubry Has A Wooden Hand moved to The Noid Has A Wooden Hand: ehem no reason2008-12-16T23:15:26Z<p><a href="/wiki/Blubry_Has_A_Wooden_Hand" class="mw-redirect" title="Blubry Has A Wooden Hand">Blubry Has A Wooden Hand</a> moved to <a href="/wiki/The_Noid_Has_A_Wooden_Hand" title="The Noid Has A Wooden Hand">The Noid Has A Wooden Hand</a>: ehem no reason</p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>So there's this guy called the Noid.<br />
<br />
He has a wooden hand.<br />
<br />
He lost it in the war. Why?<br />
<br />
I don't know.<br />
<br />
And neither does he!<br />
<br />
It's not a prosthetic wooden hand.<br />
<br />
It's just an ornament.<br />
<br />
He uses it to design gloves, rings, thumb cups, slide tools and the death star.<br />
<br />
Sometimes he makes the hand do rude gestures.<br />
<br />
The fingers are flexible, you see.<br />
<br />
Sometimes he hangs it out from his window on a piece of string to scare the local children.<br />
<br />
Stupid kids get scared real easy.<br />
<br />
Sometimes he takes photos of them and sends them to JCM.<br />
<br />
Stupid kids get scared real easy.<br />
<br />
It's the right hand.<br />
<br />
He bought it as a pair, it came with a left hand.<br />
<br />
I borrowed the left hand.<br />
<br />
Then I lost it.<br />
<br />
I apologised and he said it was okay.<br />
<br />
He was alright with it.<br />
<br />
He's a nice guy.<br />
<br />
I said I'd give him the money for it.<br />
<br />
He said don't worry he only needs the right hand.<br />
<br />
I don't know what that means.<br />
<br />
Sometimes when he goes to see his grandfather he sticks it up his sleeve.<br />
<br />
Then he waits for his grandfather to shake his hand.<br />
<br />
Then it falls out.<br />
<br />
He stopped recently because his two grandfathers became one when he did it.<br />
<br />
He says he can feel it all the time.<br />
<br />
Even when it's not with him.<br />
<br />
He always knows where it is.<br />
<br />
I say if he know where the left one was I wouldn't have lost it!<br />
<br />
We laugh at this.<br />
<br />
So, who would like a wooden hand?<br />
<br />
Go to the park and throw it at ducks?<br />
<br />
My child, if you say you would like a wooden hand, you may want to know that it's not easy.<br />
<br />
They need attension.<br />
<br />
And they need to be walked twice a day, if not more.<br />
<br />
No, not really.<br />
<br />
Go ahead and get one.<br />
<br />
Two, if you want.<br />
<br />
Maybe we can all get one.<br />
<br />
Start a club.<br />
<br />
A club of wooden hands.<br />
<br />
The Wooden Hand Club.<br />
<br />
It'll be great.<br />
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Whatever you do though, don't let your parents know.<br />
<br />
They won't approve.<br />
<br />
They won't want you obsessing with it.<br />
<br />
Spending lots of time with it.<br />
<br />
They'll say you need a girlfriend.<br />
<br />
I know.<br />
<br />
I lost my left one.</div>Dinoshaur