Super Sam: 11 revisions: Glorious Gravy Boat - WUE Edition

2010-06-02T08:03:32Z

11 revisions: Glorious Gravy Boat - WUE Edition

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==Overview==

'''Thatkidsam Email #65'''

'''Part #4 in [[thatkidsam.muffin/Shadow Retribution|Shadow Retribution]]'''

Thatkidsam is captured by Starturne Industries and its army of Italian stereotypes.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' [[thatkidsam.muffin/Thatkidsam|Thatkidsam]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/Omni|Omni]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/Candy Shop Assassins|Candy Shop Assassins]], [[HRWiki:Homestar Runner|Homestar Runner]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/Nocturne|Nocturne]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/minor#Italian Stereotype Army|Italian Stereotype Army]]

'''Places:''' [[HRWiki:Bubs' Concession Stand|Bubs' Concession Stand]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/Inconspicuous Buzzing Sign Place|Inconspicuous Buzzing Sign Place]], [[thatkidsam.muffin/Starturne Industries|Starturne Industries]]

{{Thatkidsam Comp|Gameslayer}}

'''Date:''' November 4th, 2005

'''Lines:''' 83

==Transcript==

''{The Gameslayer logo appears on the screen, and a black figure labeled "Omni" runs across the screen with a banner reading "Version: DUST BE CHOKIN' ME, DAWG." Then, two icons appear: "Omni-Mail" and "Add New File".}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Ah, email. The one thing the four Sams have in common.

''{The Thatkidsam Omni runs over to the "Omni-Mail" icon and taps it. The screen transitions to an email that pops up.}''

<blockquote class="gameslayer">
Dear Thatkidsam 
Be careful on the river! I'm warning you! The river is not to be trusted 
Pnhkcopnzsollepntt mnapn</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' ''{Starts to read with a very fake Australian accent, but clears his throat and resumes with his normal voice. He stops right before "Pnhkcopnzsollepntt mnapn".}'' Uhh... Pun-hook-coppen-zuh-so-lleprechaun? Uhh, I'ma call you Josh...ua.

<blockquote class="gameslayer">Sorry to interrupt you, but due to the X6th amendment, mortals may no longer mention the names of the holiest admins.</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' But that means I can't mention Ekul anymore!

<blockquote class="gameslayer">Oh, yeah. I'll go hack into the White House and amend the constitution somehow. I'm not sure how that would work, but, uh, I'll try. Bzzt! Clock! Yay, it's removed, somehow! Oh, and I also removed the one that prohibits slavery.</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Ah. What did it ever do for us, anyway? ...So, Joshua, why should I heed your warning? When has listening to an admin's warning ever stopped something bad from happening?

<blockquote class="gameslayer">Uhh, that time when you were banned from the GameFAQs forums for spamming?</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Shut up. Bubs got you for checking email, not hacking into my mind. I don't even know how you do that.

<blockquote class="gameslayer">Actually, I don't know either. It's like having a laser in your finger and not knowing.</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Well, I bet I can safely Omnify this one. Heh... Omnify... Such a crappy deletion method...

''{Thatkidsam flips up a cap on the keyboard and presses a black button. Omni runs onto the screen carrying a chainsaw, and precedes to hack the email to death. Omni dusts his hands for some reason, and walks off.}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Well, I've got a few more minutes before my Candy Shop meeting, so I'll go ahead and answer another.

''{The screen transitions to an email that pops up.}''

<blockquote class="gameslayer">
Dear thatkidsam, 
Don't get shot in the leg 
Runningman</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' ''{Takes on a worried tone at the word "shot"}'' What the crap? Me? Shot in the leg? I doubt it. Unless you're some psychic who knows the future, I can't believe you. Anyway, I'm going to just leave. Yeah, see ya.

<blockquote class="gameslayer">If you don't turn me off, my battery will die.</blockquote>

'''THATKIDSAM:''' You don't have a battery. And shut up, we don't want this email to be too long.

<blockquote class="gameslayer">Good. Let's just end it now.</blockquote>

''{Omni's banner momentarily flies by. After a few seconds, Thatkidsam gets up and leaves. The banner falls down, and Omni shrugs and walks off the screen.}''

''{Cut to the Inconspicuous Buzzing Sign Place, where Thatkidsam and several other Candy Shop Assassins are sitting around a table.}''

'''JANGO MUIKA:''' Okay. Long story short, we need that Undabite man dead. He is often accompanied by a shadowy partner, and they are both extremely alert.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #1:''' Ah. Can we have the ExtendedSlayerTM knives? I've heard that even if you have psychic powers, you can't see them fast enough to dodge them.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #2:''' Yeah! Enough of these rusty things!

'''JANGO MUIKA:''' Should I get the leader?

''{Jango walks through to the, uh, "kitchen", and an extremely dark figure, about the same size as Thatkidsam, walks out. He takes a long look at Thatkidsam.}''

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' Ah, Thatkidsam. The-

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #2:''' Finally! That's what ATKS stands for! Wait... What does the A stand for?

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' -Assassin of the Sterrance Angels, I've heard.

'''THATKIDSAM:''' W-what? How do you know that? The only people who know that are the ones who saw me on TV when I ruined the Olympics!

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' ...That could be anyone, moron! Everyone watches the Olympics!

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Mainly just old people.

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' Sh-shut up! Anyway, I guess you can have some good knives. I'll use your ice cream money to buy it.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSINS #1 & #2:''' Awwww...

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Well, you can get two knives, but I won't use any daggers other than my own Ikaguri-style expanding knives.

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' Hm... With the money we would've spent on Thatkidsam's daggers, we can now afford a dixie cup full of coleslaw.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSINS #1 & #2:''' COOL!

'''THATKIDSAM:''' So, when does this mission start?

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' Right now. ''{Starts laughing maniacally, and pulls a lever, opening up the floor and sending the three assassins to their doom}''

'''JANGO MUIKA:''' Was that really nessesscary?

'''OMINOUS FIGURE:''' Not really.

''{Cut to outside a large, star-shaped skyscraper with a huge, gold sign labeled "Starturne Industries". Thatkidsam and the two Candy Shop Assassins collide with the ground with a thump. Cut to inside the building, where Homestar and Nocturne, dressed in futuristic armor, are sitting in a desk.}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' I hearken a fracas!

'''NOCTURNE:''' I discharge, too. UNLEASH THE STEREOTYPES.

''{Nocturne slowly presses a red button on the desk. Cut to outside the building, where Thatkidsam and the two Candy Shop Assassins are standing.}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Wow. I guess this is it.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #1:''' You know, landing in an open field was not very good. People can easily see us in our black garb.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #2:''' That sucks.

''{The side doors of Starturne Industries opens. Tons of fat, mustachioed clone men waddle out in large rows. Zoom in on a few of them. They appear to all be Italian stereotypes.}''

'''ITALIAN STEREOTYPE #1:''' Ah, I like-a thees pizza. ''{Brandishes a pizza box filled with various sharp, pointy objects}''

'''ITALIAN STEREOTYPE #2:''' Ah, I like-a thees pasta. ''{Brandishes a huge, iron fusilli noodle with a large barrel at the end}''

'''ITALIAN STEREOTYPE #3:''' Ah, I like-a thees tie to the mafia. ''{Brandishes an extremely large gun}''

''{Within a few seconds, Italian stereotypes fill the field. The assassins are soon cornered.}''

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #1:''' Well, looks like I won't be having pizza tonight.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #2:''' Uhh, SOS?

'''THATKIDSAM:''' You two handle the Italian stereotypes. I'll go get help.

'''CANDY SHOP ASSASSIN #1:''' Uhh... That's going to be kind of hard, considering our main weapons are actually Twizzlers.

''{Thatkidsam activates a Pwnage abillity in fast motion, allowing him to fly over the sea of stereotypes. He lands near the building.}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Hm... Where to get help... Hey! ''{The camera shifts to the right, revealing a river}'' It's a river! I'll get help there!

''{Thatkidsam runs over to the river, and a cheesy sniper sequence occurs. Bullets fly from somewhere in the river.}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Oh, crap, I'm being shot in the leg! ''{Well, uh, he is being shot in the leg}''

''{While he is being brutally wounded, a stereotype waddles over and slams a pizza box on top of Thatkidsam. He is now inside.}''

'''ITALIAN STEREOTYPE #4:''' Ah, I like-a thees pizza ingredients. ''{Lifts the box above his head, apparently having trouble balancing it}''

''{Cut to a jail cell. Thatkidsam is rotting in it.}''

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Ugh... So tired...

'''MYSTERIOUS SPEECH IMPEDIMENTED VOICE:''' So... Thatkidsam... Our encounter is encored...

'''THATKIDSAM:''' Oh, crap! Another situation in which I need a dictionary to understand how I'm going to die.

''{Omni runs across the screen, leaving a banner with the message "Click Here to E-Mail Thatkidsam @ [http://fanstuff.hrwiki.org/index.php?title=Talk:thatkidsam.muffin&action=edit thatkidsam@thatkidsam.muffin]".}''

==Easter Eggs==
*Click on Thatkidsam to see yet another stereotype.

'''ITALIAN STEREOTYPE:''' Ah, I like-a thees Italian stereotype. ''{Brandishes an extremely large copy of the original Super Mario Bros. game}''

==Fun Facts==
*The email intro is a reference to how [[User:Thatkidsam|Thatkidsam]], [[User:Shim-Sham-Sam|Shim-Sham-Sam]], [[User:Super Sam|Super Sam]], and [[User:Sahm|Sahm]] all own an email show that is successful or cool.
*"I'ma call you Josh...ua" is a reference to [[HRWiki:crazy cartoon|crazy cartoon]], where Strong Bad said a similar quote.
*[http://www.gamefaqs.com GameFAQs] is a popular video game walkthrough, cheat, and forum site.
*[[Wikipedia:Twizzler|Twizzlers]] are a popular kind of licorice.
*[[Wikipedia:Mario|Super Mario Bros.]] is obviously a game published by Nintendo in 1985. Apparently, Mario was Italian.

==Author's Comments==
*Rating: C
*No comment

{{Muffin}}

Thatkidsam.muffin/most your base - Revision history

Super Sam: 11 revisions: Glorious Gravy Boat - WUE Edition