Sarette: gnu version

2008-08-22T19:46:36Z

gnu version

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'''Sarette Email #1'''

Sarette lists three of her mortal enemies.

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' Sarette Sprinter

'''Places:''' Sarette's Spare Room, The Slightly Different Field, Sarette's Living Room

'''Computer:''' Compustine

'''Date:''' August 20, 2008

'''Running Time:''' 2:37

'''Page Title:''' The first one!

== Transcript ==

'''SARETTE:''' Now, let's see what's new in the email. Of the new...of the email, of the new...oh, whatever!

<blockquote class="sarette">
<div>subj: foes</div>
Hey, Sarette!

Do you have any mortal enemies?

- ZPP
</blockquote>

''{Sarette reads ZPP as 'Zee Peruvian Pear'.}''

'''SARETTE:''' Well, I don't get much mail from Peruvian pears! ...Or, any mail. Well, I have quite a few mortal enemies. Here's some. Hmm. Well, there was this guy who threw a pie at the back of my head other day.

''{Fade to Sarette standing in The Slightly Different Field. A pie is thrown from off the screen, hitting Sarette in the back of the head.}''

'''SARETTE:''' Hey! ''{turns around}'' I dare you to do that again!

''{A pie is thrown from the opposite side of the screen, once again hitting Sarette in the back of the head.}''

'''SARETTE:''' ''{furious}'' I'm going to tear you apart limb from limb if you throw another pie at the back of my head!

''{A pie is thrown from off screen, this time hitting Sarette in the face.}''

'''SARETTE:''' ...Strawberry.

''{Fade to Sarette at the Compustine, like before.}''

'''SARETTE:''' Or this guy who instant messaged me last week.

''{Fade to Sarette at the Compustine, with the following chat unraveling: <blockquote class="sarette">
awesomed00d84> hai!!! 
snowcherub> ...hi? 
snowcherub> do i know you? 
awesomed00d84> ya, i was in the pie irc chat, rmembr? 
snowcherub> were you the guy who kept saying asdf? 
awesomed00d84> ya lol 
awesomed00d84> a/s/l? 
snowcherub> why? 
awesomed00d84> i want 2 meet u 
awesomed00d84> a/s/l? 
snowcherub> no 
awesomed00d84> wai??? 
snowcherub> like i don't know you're going to kill me right when you come in 
awesomed00d84> lol no! 
awesomed00d84> a/s/l??? 
snowcherub> *hits head with frying pan* 
snowcherub> fgyhygtyuys8687g 
awesomed00d84> wut? 
snowcherub logged off.
</blockquote>
''After Sarette types '*hits head with frying pan*' she actually does, causing her to become insane. The line 'fgyhygtyuys8687g' is a result of Sarette bashing her head on the keyboard. Fade back to the current, non-flashback scene of Sarette on the Compustine.}''

'''SARETTE:''' Oh yeah, and that fly that flew in my house yesterday.

''{Fade to Sarette's Living Room. A fly flies in, and Sarette follows with a rolled-up newspaper. Sarette attempts to swat the fly three times, each time missing it. In a fit of rage, Sarette then begins swatting all around the room, missing the fly, until she hits herself on the head, causing her to go insane.}''

'''SARETTE:''' YaAaAaAaAaAa...''{voice trails off as she runs off, voice trails in again as she runs back in the other direction on the celing}'' ...AaAaAaAaAaAa... ''{voice trails off again as she runs off}''

''{Fade back to Sarette at the Compustine.}''

'''SARETTE:''' Ugh. I have to stop now. This is giving me too many negetive thoughts. Don't send any more emails like this, or you'll be another one of my mortal enemies.

''{The Notepaper comes down.}''

== Fun Facts ==

*A/S/L is an internet term meaning "age/sex/location", inquiring what each of these are.
*This is the first time Sarette goes crazy.

Sarette Emails/1 - Revision history

Sarette: gnu version