JCM: the most original email ever

2010-12-03T01:13:54Z

the most original email ever

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Im a bell gets a wirus.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Why, Rus?</blockquote>
== Summary ==
'''Cast (in order of their appearance): {{User:Im a bell/sig}}, Vegerot, Toregev, Senor Cardgage, Strong Mad, Senubs, Homestar, Bubs, Bardgage, PBTC Strong Bad, PBTC Homestar, Stinkoman, 1-up, I Am Bell, Sir Belletto.'''

'''Places: Im a bell's computer room, The Field, Bubs' Concession Stand, PBTC FCUSA, Sir Belletto's Telegramaphone Room.'''

== Transcript ==
'''IM A BELL:'''''{singing}'' Nothhiiiiiiing, has ever happened to Chimeeeeeeerrr... ''{stops singing}'' I hope this doen't jinx anything.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Besides your spelling, of course.</blockquote>
<blockquote class=imabell><div>No Subject</div>ert+<br>
y76p; '0lu8jykee;u4p;e'/Rh<br>
Im a be15456`-------++++++gf<br>
+++++-//==========/*8901ikg</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' How original.</blockquote>
''{Im a bell pronounces this as "ert plus,
Why seven-six P? Ohlyuu eight jIkee semicolon. You for P. semicolon? E'slashruh? Imabeh? One five-four five-six! Seven dashes, six pluses! Gee, Eff five pluses. Dash doubleslash ten equals slash asterisk.
eight-nine-one-O,
I. Kayjay"}''
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I, Kanye Jest.</blockquote>
'''IM A BELL:'''''{typing}'' Uh... what? are you illiterate?
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' are you one to talk?</blockquote>
Wait, is this leet? ''{stops typing}'' Yeah, it's leet.

''{Vegerot walks up}''

'''VEGEROT:''' Bellstrom, what you got there is a virus.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' It always is.</blockquote>
'''IM A BELL:''' Oh. Hold on.

''{Im a bell types in "Jethro the Wirus Killer" The words "JIBNEY VIRUSES FOUND! HOORAY!"
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' That'll stop a heart.</blockquote>
appear onscreen}''

'''IM A BELL:''' WAAH!!!! Using a word as a number?!!!
That means there's too many viruses on my Chimer 1337! Noooo!!!

''{an explosion comes out of the keyboard. the word "ASPLODED'D!!" appears onscreen}''
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' What a shame.</blockquote>
'''IM A BELL:''' WOAH!!!! This is worse than when I got Jibney Vi-Oh, wait...

''{Vegerot inverts}''

'''IM A BELL:''' What the?

'''TOREGEV:'''''{bubs' voice}'' DON'T EAT MY CHICKEN WIIIIIIIINGS!!!!!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Ooh.</blockquote>
''{cut to the field. Senor Cardgage and Strong Mad are there}''

'''SENOR CARDGAGE:''' Well, hello Fairy Princess, can you hand me-

''{Senor's head dissapears and is replaced by bubs'}''

'''SENUBS:'''''{bubs' voice}'' -5 dollars!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Aah.</blockquote>
'''STRONG MAD:''' WAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!

''{Strong Mad becomes The Heavy Lourde.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I say. This is a spectacle.</blockquote>
cut to Bub's Concession Stand. Bubs and Homestar are there}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' I'll have... an Orange.

'''BUBS:''' That'll be-

''{Bubs' head dissappears.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Diss again.</blockquote>
It is replaced by Senor Cardgage's}''

'''BARDGAGE:'''''{Senor Cardgage's voice}'' -my Aldi
Bag, please.

'''HOMESTAR:''' Uhh... ''{singing}'' You kinda smell like pea souuuuuppp!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' How freaking original.</blockquote>
''{Homestar explodes}''
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Yup.</blockquote>
'''BARDGAGE:''' Gooday, Argentina.

''{cut to PBTC FCUSA. PBTC Strong Bad and PBTC Homestar are there}''

'''PBTC STRONG BAD:''' I can do it! I will do it nine times!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm sure you will.</blockquote>
'''{PBTC Strong Bad is replaced by Stinkoman. PBTC Homestar is replaced by 1-up. Stinkoman hits 1-up 9 times. each time 1-up says "Pudding!".
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Nothing new here.</blockquote>
cut back to the computer room}''

'''IM A BELL:''' Okay, this is getting weird. Even the other universes are getting messed up!

''{I Am Bell appears}''
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Every other email.</blockquote>
'''I AM BELL:'''''{Homestar's voice}'' Nevew feaw, Stwo-Ahem! ''{normal voice}'' Never fear, Im a bell! i can fix it! SUPER CHURCHBELL DEUUUUUUUUCE!!!!!

''{I Am Bell Deuces the Chimer 1337.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' How did that get in there?</blockquote>
The email rewinds to right before Vegerot inverts. for some reason, I Am Bell is still deucing the Chimer.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' "You will come out! I demand it!"</blockquote>
He stops deucing and the Chimer now has a darker body,
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' It's called "excrement".</blockquote>
a red screen, a blue subject bar, yellow words, and at the bottom, it says Chimer 20X6}''

'''IM A BELL:''' Uhh... what the crap did you do to my chimer?

'''I AM BELL:''' I upgraded it to the edition W9 (pronounced "Dubyaty-nine) years in the future! Oh, and check this out!

''{I Am Bell types in "alphacram.exe" into the Chimer 20X6 and a bell sprite with a face appears onscreen}''

'''BELL SPRITE:''' Hellote! I are Alpo Creamery! All your base are belong to us!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' What a relief.</blockquote>
'''IM A BELL:''' Uhh... What?!

'''I AM BELL:''' Sorry. this is a badly-made copy of Alpha Stan. You see, it was put in a .zip folder, and it warped into a bell-shape. It also is illiterate. So,
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' It'll fit in fine.</blockquote>
they called him Alpha Cram! I'll translate. He said, "Hi! I'm Alpha Cram! I will take care of all your files for you!"

'''IM A BELL:''' No! No! Don't do that!

'''ALPHA CRAM:''' Warts?!!!
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Nah, I had them removed months ago. I'm fine.</blockquote>
'''I AM BELL:''' He said, "What?" Hold on, Alpha Cram, "Noose! Noose! Negative Action! ("Action" pronounced as "Ak-tee-ohn!")

'''ALPHA CRAM:''' Joe.
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Mama.</blockquote>
'''I AM BELL:''' "Oh."

'''IM A BELL:''' Can I delete him?

'''I AM BELL:''' Unfortunately, no. It's impossible.

''{the paper comes down. 5 second later,
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' This show still suck.</blockquote>
Alpha Cram bites off one of the paper's corners}''

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JCM: the most original email ever