Noxigar at 04:08, 4 November 2011

2011-11-04T04:08:32Z

Noxigar: IF THERE'S A BUSTLE IN YOUR HEDGEROW, DON'T BE ALARMED NOW

2011-11-04T04:08:00Z

IF THERE'S A BUSTLE IN YOUR HEDGEROW, DON'T BE ALARMED NOW

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Noxigar: To riff later

2011-11-04T02:31:16Z

To riff later

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== Summary ==
Tracy goes insane.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Took him ''this'' long did it</blockquote>

'''Cast: Im a bell, Cameraman, Tracy, A Koopa Troopa/A Turtle, A Goomba/A Little Kid, A Hammer Bro/Zoo977, A Man/Bowser, Sarah, Mature Bling, Don Skull, Bell Soul, Hollow Bell Soul, Yog Sothoth Soul, Stephen Colbert Soul'''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' '''''OH SON OF A BITCH'''''</blockquote>

'''Places: Outside Bell's House, Bling's Living Room, Mushroom Kingdom/Japan, Tunnel/Sewers, Bridge Over Lava/Atop A Power Line, Hospital, Bell's Mind'''

'''Episode Information: 405-Maybe I'm the One Who is a Schizophrenic Psycho/Never Try To Talk To'''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' '''Bell In Real Life'''</blockquote>

'''Your Own Soul. He's a Total Prick'''

'''Insult: evil monkey in my closet'''

'''Credit Joke: Somebody You Don't Know'''
== Transcript ==
''{open to outside Bell's house. Bell opens the door. He is in his underwear}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Which is odd, because usually he doesn't even wear anything. '''BLUEBRY:''' "Footie pajamas are the new thing okay"</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' ...It's ten in the frigging morning! What in the ''{BLEEP}''ING HELL do you want?!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Wake up, sleepyhead! It's time for school! '''BLUEBRY:''' "Brunch isn't even until 15 minutes!"</blockquote>

'''CAMERAMAN:'''''{offscreen}'' We're here to film this episode. Can we come in?

'''IM A BELL:''' ...You guys aren't allowed in this house!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Not until you say "please".</blockquote>

We film in Bling's house!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Bling bling in the hizzouse</blockquote>

'''CAMERAMAN:'''''{offscreen}'' But-

'''IM A BELL:''' SCREW OFF! ''{slams the door}''

'''CAMERAMAN:'''''{offscreen}'' ...Okay, let's go bother Tracy.

''{cue opening theme. cut to Bling's living room. Tracy walks in and notices a mushroom on the couch}''

'''TRACY:''' Huh? ''{eats mushroom, eye twitches}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' This is a normal reaction. '''SKULLB:''' Bell is the kind of person who probably tries to make anime expressions in real life. '''BLUEBRY:''' "I wonder if ''this'' kills me..."</blockquote>

''{cut to Tracy's brain. It grows eyes and a mouth and starts screaming.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Fun Fact: That's kinda what's happening to me right now.</blockquote>

''After a few seconds, it stops. It's eyes widen and it pauses for a few seconds. Then, it wellfaces.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">''{Synchronized groan}''</blockquote>

''After a few seconds, it disintegrates. cut back to Tracy}''

'''TRACY:''' ...OH MEE GEE.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Is this an acronym with a Scottish accent? '''SKULLB:''' OCH AYE FETCH ME A CORONA YEH WEE LITTLE MAN</blockquote>

''{cut to Tracy's view of everything. It looks like a Super Mario Bros. level.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' '''''GODDAMMIT'''''</blockquote>

''the screen splitscreens to show both Tracy's view and reality. To simulate this, two transcripts will occur; tracy's view and the real world}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' How does one film somebody else's delusions? '''SKULLB:''' That depends. How does one film Records of Bell?</blockquote>

=== Tracy's View ===
<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' Oh this is going to be terrible</blockquote>
''{There is a door leading out of a castle. He opens it and exits. Cut to outside the castle}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' once i ate some shrooms i totally thought i was sonic '''SKULLB:''' I was tripping on salvia and I swear to God I was Plok.</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' It's-a me; Mario! ''{sees a Koopa Troopa and a Goomba}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''{groans}''</blockquote>

''{Tracy stomps on the Koopa Troopa, turning it into a shell. He then grabs it and throws the shell at the Goomba. Both the shell and the Goomba explode}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' W...what? '''SKULLB:''' What is this, Super Eversion Bros.? '''BLUEBRY:''' ... I don't get it. '''SKULLB:''' Got dangit Bluebry</blockquote>

'''TRACY(:'''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' (: '''SKULLB:''' >:( '''BLUEBRY:''' :o</blockquote>

Ah-ha-haiii! ''{hits a ? Block. A Fire Flower comes out of it. Tracy grabs it and becomes Fire Tracy}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' YOU CAN'T BECOME FIRE ME I BECOME QUIT</blockquote>

''{cut to a Piranha Plant.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Number one supplier of vicious piranhas since 1934!</blockquote>

''Tracy fires a fireball at it, destroying it. Cut to a Hammer Bro beside a warp pipe}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' You know, I've played the game. I don't need to see all this. '''SKULLB:''' NO BUT YOU DO ''YOU DO''</blockquote>

'''FIRE TRACY:''' It's a Hammer Bro!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' "I'm in a video game!"</blockquote>

'''HAMMER BRO:''' ... ''{throws a hammer at Fire Tracy}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Would I be considered insane if this was my normal reaction to these characters? '''BLUEBRY:''' Hammer Bro is an obvious metaphor for good taste</blockquote>

''{Fire Tracy blasts a fireball at the hammer bro, destroying it. He enters the warp pipe. Cut to a tunnel. Fire Tracy exits the warp pipe}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' Is there like, a competition to make the action sequences as boring as possible?</blockquote>

'''FIRE TRACY:''' Hmm... Where is he... ''{walks through the tunnel}''

''{cut to a few minutes later, at a bridge over lava. Bowser and an ax''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''axe''</blockquote>

''is there.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''are there.''</blockquote>

''Fire Tracy runs in, grabs the ax,''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''axe''</blockquote>

''and cuts the rope holding up the bridge. Bowser falls into the lava}''

'''FIRE TRACY:''' Mario wins! WHOA~ ''{falls into the lava}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' ''{imitating the SMB death sound}'' Broop-boop ba-doo-doop da-Tracy-is-dead</blockquote>

''{END INSANITY}''

=== Reality ===
''{There is a wall.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Minimalism!</blockquote>

''Tracy smashes through it. Cut to outside the house}''

'''TRACY:''' WIBBLE WIBBLE WIBBLE!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Records of Bell: Nothing is Sacred Any More</blockquote>

''{sees a turtle and a little kid}''

''{Tracy stomps on the turtle, crushing it. He then picks up the turtle carcass and throws it at the kid. The kid runs away, horrified. All the time this is happening, Tracy is foaming at the mouth}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' I've got to admit, I actually am laughing at this. Should I be ashamed? '''SKULLB:''' You should probably wash your mouth out with buckshot.</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' WIBBLE WIBBLE GOOMBA WIBBLE WIBBLE! ''{hits a brick ledge with his''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' wait this is a ''dude''?</blockquote>

''head, making it bleed.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Anything to promote head trauma is fine with me!</blockquote>

''There is a flamethrower sitting on top of it.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' "Guess I'll just leave the flamethrower here, under no locks or precautions, where anybody can get it, then leave it for a couple hours. What could go wrong?!"</blockquote>

''Tracy grabs it}''

''{cut to a garden. Tracy burns it with the flamethrower. Cut to Zoo977 beside a manhole}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Why does he have a garden in Japan? '''SKULLB:''' NO IT IS A ZEN GARDEN WITH ''BONSAI''</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' HAMMER WIBBLE!

'''ZOO977:''' ...WHAT THE F-

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Zoo's also way way way against cursing. '''SKULLB:''' It was probably a replacement swear. Like, "WHAT THE FRUIT" or something.</blockquote>

''{Tracy lights Zoo on fire with the flamethrower.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' I should probably laugh at this. I'm just... ''{sighs}'' I'm just too depressed.</blockquote>

''Zoo runs off, screaming. Tracy jumps into the manhole. Cut to the sewers. Tracy falls out of the manhole}''

'''TRACY:''' BOSS WIBBLE...

''{runs through the sewers}''

''{cut to a few minutes later, at a power line. A man is there.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Where in relation to the power line? Is he a tightrope walker doing his most "ELECTRIFYING STUNT YET"? '''SKULLB:''' Apparently the power line is under ground.</blockquote>

''Tracy runs in and breaks the wire, causing the man to fall to his death}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Records of Bell: We Think Nothing of Manslaughter</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' WIN WIBBLE! WIIIIIIIIIIIIBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLE... ''{falls}''

''{END CORRESPONDING REALITY}''

=== The End Of The Episode ===
''{fade to black. cut to a hospital via the opening of eyes.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' COMMENCE THE OPENING OF EYES TO MAKE BLINK</blockquote>

''Bell, Sarah, and MB are standing around the screen}''

'''IM A BELL:''' He's waking up!

''{camera spins around to show that Tracy is in a hospital bed. his arm is broken and there are bandages around his forehead}''

'''TRACY:''' Huh? Wh-what happened?

'''IM A BELL:''' We don't know.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Well, thank god it was all, you know, CAUGHT ON TAPE.</blockquote>

They found you beside a dead guy under a broken power line. Your brain turned to ash,

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' How did he recover, then? '''SKULLB:''' Records of Bell: If You Thought Head Trauma Was Bad</blockquote>

your head was bleeding, and your arm was broken.

'''TRACY:''' Strange.

'''SARAH:''' Yeah.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' '''THE ACTION NEVER STOPS'''</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' Hmm... I'm starting to remember what happened...

'''MATURE BLING:''' Really? What?

'''TRACY:''' Well, it all started wh-

'''DON SKULL:'''''{wheels in}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' The Freewheelin' Don Skullivan. '''SKULLB:''' Don't you make fun of my handicap.</blockquote>

Hey, has anybody seen a 'shroom I left back at MB's house?

'''TRACY:''' ...Where EXACTLY did you put it?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' "In your mouth." '''SKULLB:''' "While you slept."</blockquote>

'''DON SKULL:''' On the couch.

'''TRACY:''' ...YOU ASSHOLE!!! ''{starts beating up Don Skull}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' With a broken arm? Wow, what a trooper. :salute: '''BLUEBRY:''' "WHY DID YOU LEAVE DRUGS ON THE COUCH YOU KNOW I LOVE DRUGS ON THE COUCH"</blockquote>

'''DON SKULL:''' HEY! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!

'''IM A BELL:''' ...Well, I think we know what happened.

'''DON SKULL:''' What-Oh. Crap. Um... Am I going to have to pay for this?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' no we have socialized medicine but that means that a '''BUREAUCRAT WILL STAND BETWEEN YOU AND YOUR DOCTOR'''</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' No. He should just fix himself with reality-bending powers.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' OH THANK GOD ''SOME''BODY FINALLY REMEMBERED THEIR SUPERPOWERS</blockquote>

'''TRACY:'''''{gets up, transforms into normal}'' Right. But... ''{gets in Don Skull, dives''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' DIVE, DIVE, DIVE!</blockquote>

''him into a wall}'' That should teach you not to leave your shrooms lying around. Oh, by the way, mushroom, blood, and Tortan? Tastes horrible.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' I'm fairly sure one doesn't eat tartan but go ahead?</blockquote>

''{everyone but Don Skull laughs. He writhes in pain. cut to black.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Yay, it's over!</blockquote>

'' After a few seconds the words "EPISODE 23 PART DEUX: NEVER TRY TO TALK TO YOUR SOUL. HE'S A TOTAL PRICK" appear.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' oh WHAT '''SKULLB:''' FORGET THIS I AM OUT OF HERE ''{SkullB leaves the theater.}'' '''CHWOKA:''' Pff. Good luck.</blockquote>

''Fade to black. Cut to Bling's living room. Bell and co''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Nobody likes co. Not even enough to capitalize his name.</blockquote>

''are standing around a Bell clone strapped to an electric chair. There is a wire coming out of the chair. It is glowing}''

'''SARAH:''' So, wait. WHY are we doing this?

'''IM A BELL:''' Why the hell not?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' yeah i've stopped reading</blockquote>

'''SARAH:''' Good point.

''{Bell becomes Soul Reaper Bell, slices open a hole in the universe, sticks the wire into the hole, and flips the switch, frying the clone, and creating a portal into his mind}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ''{grim}'' There's a party in my mind... ''{SkullB walks back in.}'' '''CHWOKA:''' So? How was your little excursion? '''SKULLB:''' ''{slightly distressed}'' Well! They've got sentry robots out there. ... I didn't really, uh, know that the first time.</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:'''''{transforms back}'' And now we will see my soul. ''{enters the portal}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Wait, how did they know this would happen?</blockquote>

''{everyone else follows Bell into the portal. cut to a pink and organic''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Orgasmic? '''SKULLB:''' Eww. You nasty.</blockquote>

''-looking hallway. There are metal doors labeled various things everywhere.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' "WELCOME TO VARIOUS THINGS EVERYWHERE!"</blockquote>

''A portal appears and everybody steps out of it}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' OH MY GOD THE SCENE DESCRIPTION IS SO ''VIVID'' IT'S LIKE I'M THERE '''SKULLB:''' I wish I wasn't.</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' Well, we're here.

'''TRACY:''' But where IS here?

'''IM A BELL:''' Inside my mind.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ''{half-singing}'' I need something to change your mind. </blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' ...What.

'''IM A BELL:''' I'm serious. This is my mind.

'''MATURE BLING:''' ...Hey, what's this door labeled "DO NOT ENTER"? ''{opens door}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Then he was never seen again because he was a friggin' MORON!</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' Hey! Stop tha-

'''MATURE BLING:''' ...Huh. I never thought Bell was a furry.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Strangely enough, I already hate to maximum capacity, and do not hate him any more for this. '''SKULLB:''' Oh, ''I'm'' starting to hate him more. And believe me, Bell Quest's first chapter pretty much skyrocketed it to maximum capacity.</blockquote>

...Among other things.

'''TRACY:'''''{laughs}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' THAT IS NOT DIALOG THAT IS ''ACTION'' COME THE FRUIT ON GUYS</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:'''''{eye twitches}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Are seizures normal reactions to embarassment?</blockquote>

GET OUT OF THERE. ''{grabs Mature Bling, flings him into a wall}'' Now come on! We're going to my soul.

'''DON SKULL:''' Ooh. What's it like?

'''IM A BELL:''' I have no idea.

'''TRACY:''' So how do we get there?

'''IM A BELL:''' At the end of this hallway. Follow me. ''{starts walking}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' '''th' action nemba stomps'''</blockquote>

''{everyone follows Bell. Cut to the end of the hallway. There are two doors. One labeled "COLLECTED SOULS" and the other "BELL'S REAL SOULS". Everyone walks in}''

'''IM A BELL:'''''{reading}'' "BELL'S REAL SOUL'''''S'''''"? What? ''{opens door}'' ...What.

'''MATURE BLING:''' That's... That's just strange.

''{camera spins around to show there are four souls in the room.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' yes but what do they look like</blockquote>

''One is Bell's true hollow form, one is Bell himself, one is Yog Sothoth, and one is Stephen Colbert.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Yeah just slap that explanation wherever you feel like ''{SkullB breaks down and cries.}''</blockquote>

''The hollow one appears to be slowly sucking the life out of the Colbert one}''

'''BELL SOUL:''' Huh? Oh, hey. I was exepcting you guys to be here.

'''IM A BELL:''' What? How did you-

'''BELL SOUL:''' ...I can see anything that happens.

'''IM A BELL:''' Of course. So... Why are there four souls in here?

'''BELL SOUL:''' We each represent aspects of you. I am your basic emotions, lust, compassion, and pretty much your mind.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' But they were just IN his mind arrrrrrgh</blockquote>

The hollow

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' The DEATHLY hollow? :V</blockquote>

is your psychopathy, sociopathy, and where your powers are stored. Yog Sothoth is your envy. And Stephen Colbert is your humanity. As you can see, the hollow is slowly absorbing it.

'''SARAH:''' But why Stephen Colbert?

'''IM A BELL:''' I used to look like him.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' '''ARE YOU KIDDING ME'''</blockquote>

'''SARAH:''' Huh.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' '''NOT EVEN FOR A SECOND'''</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' Um... Is there any way I can delay my humanity getting destroyed?

'''BELL SOUL:''' You already did when you created Ll e bami.

'''IM A BELL:''' Well, how long will it take for the hollow me to completely absorb it?

'''BELL SOUL:''' About 3 years.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Which is 2012. Wait a minute...OH MY GOD.</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' ...Okay then.

'''MATURE BLING:''' Hey, when's this episode gonna-

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' -stop sucking?</blockquote>

''{cut to black. cue credits}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Apparently right now. ''{Chwoka walks outside. Exaggerated punch sounds are heard, and bullets are fired. Chwoka brings back in a battered sentry gun}'' '''SKULLB:''' ...why did you do that? '''CHWOKA:''' I ''really'' don't like sentry guns. '''NACHOMAN:''' I take offense to that!</blockquote>

@@ Line 3: / Line 3: @@
 <blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Took him ''this'' long did it</blockquote>
-<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Took him this long ''didn't'' it.<blockquote>
+<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Took him this long ''didn't'' it.</blockquote>
 '''Cast: Im a bell, Cameraman, Tracy, A Koopa Troopa/A Turtle, A Goomba/A Little Kid, A Hammer Bro/Zoo977, A Man/Bowser, Sarah, Mature Bling, Don Skull, Bell Soul, Hollow Bell Soul, Yog Sothoth Soul, Stephen Colbert Soul'''

RiffText/MFT3K/Records of Bell/23 - Revision history

Noxigar at 04:08, 4 November 2011

Noxigar: IF THERE'S A BUSTLE IN YOUR HEDGEROW, DON'T BE ALARMED NOW

Noxigar: To riff later