Noxigar at 22:31, 14 February 2011

2011-02-14T22:31:08Z

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'''''ATTENTION: CHARACTERS THAT AREN'T ON THE SHOW CANNOT BE BROADCAST, UNLESS THEY DISAPPEAR RIGHT AFTER.'''''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' Oh this is new.</blockquote>

''{open to Bell at a desk}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' We don't even get the common courtesy of a Synopsis at the top there.</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Implying anybody pays attention to the Synopsis.</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' Dammit. Can't think of anything for an episode. ...Isn't it strange that this is real life,

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' no it isn't</blockquote>

and being filmed,

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' no it isn't</blockquote>

yet I act like it's scripted? ''{glances at camera}'' Ah, well. i'll just let the fans write their own.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' There aren't any.</blockquote>

''{cue poor rendition of the theme song. cut to a badly made set that looks like Bling's living room}''

'''IM A BELL:''' I AM SO SEXY!!!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ...</blockquote>

''{Malleo walks in}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Wh-what</blockquote>

'''MALLEO:''' FIRE FLOWER.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' I-I don't think I can stand reading this. I mean at least Bell had some dignity.</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' Oh gosh its MALLEO! I LOVE YOU MALLEO!

'''TRACY:''' Dad, I hate your addiction to

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' cocaine!</blockquote>

Malleo! Get over it! Just pay attention to WEEGEE!!!!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' oh my god the fans are EVEN WORSE how is this possible '''SKULLB:''' {{smith}}</blockquote>

''{Weegee walks in}''

'''TRACY:''' Oh gosh its WEEGEE! I LOVE YOU WEEGEE!

'''IM A BELL:''' Back at ya!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' NOBODY EVEN SAID ANYTHING TO YOU AAARGH</blockquote>

''{The scene freezes. The real Bell rises from the bottom of the screen}''

'''IM A BELL:''' Ah, hell. I'm helping with this. ''{sinks offscreen}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' did he drown TELL ME HE DROWNED</blockquote>

''{the scene unfreezes. Kirby, but with a pixelated face, rides in on a warp start''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' warp stop</blockquote>

''painted to look like he american flag}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' are country '''SKULLB:''' I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO HE FLAG</blockquote>

'''KIRBY:''' Hi-

'''IM A BELL:''' I REFUSE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THE AMERICAN, 4KIDSIAN NAME OF HOSHI NO KIRBY! ''{pulls a bat from hammerspace, knocks Kirby through the window}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Are all their fans writers of Green Grass and High Tides forever? '''SKULLB:''' Are all their writers 'sperging losers?</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I can't tell if it's some offensive joke or not. Wonder if I'm a loser in this context- DAMN IT, SKULLBUGGY!</blockquote>

'''KIRBY:''' In Americaaaaaaaa...

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' IN SOVIET POP STAR POWER SWALLOWS YOU!!!!!!!</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' Just go kick Bling or something, foo.

'''IM A BELL:''' Okay! ''{kicks Bling. Sneezes. Kicks Bling again.}'' 2 BECAUSE YOU MADE ME SNEEZE!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH</blockquote>

''{Sarah comes in and kills Weegee and Malleo.}''

'''SARAH:''' NAG NAG NAG

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''TRACY:''' INNUENDO INNUENDO INNUENDO

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' HENTAI HENTAI HENTAI

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' Same old same old. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''MATURE BLING:''' ME MYSELF AND I

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''CHAOS:''' DEATH DEATH DEATH

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''SARAH:''' INEXPLICABLE PERSONALITY CHANGE SEX SEX ''{lunges at Bell}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' EVEN DIRTIER INNUENDO INNUENDO INNUENDO

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''SARAH:''' WE HAVE SEX DId YOU KNOW THAT

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' ANIME TRANSFORMATION

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAArrrrgh</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' "I'm a whiny little peach!"</blockquote>

''{Bell turns into a maniacal robot with extremely mismatched parts.}''

'''PETER PAN:''' HI

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHERE DID HE COME FROM</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' <big>!BIDEO GAMES IDORT!</big>

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHAT DOES THAT MEAN</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''DON SKULL:''' Wha... what is this? Bell, what's going on?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Is that... is that something ''sane''?!</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' ANIME

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ANIME</BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I forgot there was sometimes an echo.</blockquote>

'''DON SKULL:''' Bell? What's wrong with you?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' GENETICS OF SKULLB</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''TRACY:''' BRITISH

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHY</BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Because it isn't Japanese.</blockquote>

'''DON SKULL:''' ... Oh, God. Bell's letting the fans write an episode.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' This is-This is better at riffing the show than I could have ever done. Bravo. ''{SkullB cries while clapping.}''</blockquote>

''{Cut: Bell's room, real life. Don Skull steps in.}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHY</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''DON SKULL:''' Bell? What the hell have you done?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' HOW'D HE GET HERE</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''IM A BELL:''' CRAP-BOT, TRANSFORM!

''{Bell transforms into a jukebox, that constantly plays The Alhpabet}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHAT IS THE ALHPABET</BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' ''{singing}'' Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, NO MOOOOORREEE</blockquote>

''''''SARAH:''' I DROPPED A NON-IMPORTANT FAN CHARACTER NUKE. ANYBODY WHO HASN'T BEEN ON THE SHOW HAS BEEN KILLED.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' WHERE DID SHE COME FROM</BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' She's the Queen Bitch of the Universe.</blockquote>

''{cut back to the real RoB world}''

'''IM A BELL:''' One, how the hell did you get Sarah to let you in? And two, I have a case of life block, which makes you not be able to do anything original and/or interesting.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' We know.</blockquote>

Unfortunately, this happened the same day I had a company tour, which is confusing, since this is real life. So, I let the fans create this episode.

'''CHAOS:''' Uh... Bad idea much?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' YES VERY MUCH EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS SHOW IS A BAD IDEA</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''DON SKULL:''' Oh, hell! The Sues are leaking into our world!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' They '''already have'''.</blockquote>

NO~

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' TILDES? I HATE YOU!</BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Hey, Chwoka~</blockquote>

''{Cut back to the carppy one}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' I HATE YOU</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''IM A BELL:''' OH HONE-AY LESS GO 3 JAPIN AND HAS A BABY AND TELL NUBODEE ABOWT IT

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' I HATE YOU</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''SARAH:''' I'M SEEING SOMEONE WHO RIDES A MOTORCYCLE

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ahahahaha that actually kind of made me laugh</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' OMG WHAT!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!1!??1!/!1!?1!!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ''I HATE YOU''</BLOCKQUOTE>

'''SARAH:''' YEAH RIGHT OUT THE WINDOW

'''DOCTOR OCTAPUS:''' Greetings, I am Doctor Octapus. You may remember me from Spiderman 2, in which I kidnapped Mary Jane to lure Spierman into my lair, where I proceeded to beat the living snot out of him. I'm commonly used for Cameos on this show. That's all I have to say for now. Ta-ta!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' <BIG><BIG>I HATE YOU</BIG></BIG></BLOCKQUOTE>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' ''{singing}'' Shout, shout 
LET IT ALL OUT 
These are the things I can do without 
COME ON 
I'm talking to you 
COME ON</blockquote>

'''GILLIGAN:''' ''{Crashes through ceiling}'' .....WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' AHTHGHETGDAFGUG</BLOCKQUOTE>

''{cut back}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">''{Chwoka starts sobbing}''</blockquote>

'''IM A BELL:''' ...Okay, now you raise even more questions! I mean, only Sarah and I are supposed to be in this house!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' make it stop</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' OH HO HO HO 
'''NOXIGAR:''' THE ACTION NEVER STOPS</blockquote>

This house likely can't even be broadcast on daytime television! I'm surprised the camera crew is able to not show what's in this room alone! ...Anyways, it seems to have resolved itself. Nobody's editing anything.

''{Cut back}''

'''CHAOS:''' Bell I give u million dollar rays for beeting up sum wresslir.

'''I MA BELL:''' i can do it i can do it NINE times

''{Bell starts shifting very slowly toward the nearest wall.}''

'''DON SKULL:''' hai bell lewk owt 4 that wall.

'''BADSTAR:''' ''{Appears}'' Hai guis! I havent been in an epidysodey! LOL FIRST APPEARANCE

'''I MA BELL:''' get OUT of MY way badtars

''{Badstar explodes.}''

'''TRAAAAAACY:''' I CAN TOUCH MY TOES ONE TWO FIVE

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' wh-what was that</blockquote>

''{Tracy makes a reverse explosion sound.}''

''{cut back}''

'''IM A BELL:''' ...Oh God.

'''DON SKULL:'''''{sounds suspiciously like Strong Sad}'' Well, you better DO something about it before it gets WORSE! ''{becomes a badly-drawn character card}''

'''IM A BELL:''' NOOOOOOOO-

''{cut back. From this point, the characters are voiced by Speakonia(the Clock Crew voice thing)}''

'''I A MA BEL:''' hello tracy my good man would you like to go get a sandwich

'''TRACKY:''' i am afraid not father i have genital warts

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' it has to be from a toilet seat or something</blockquote>

'''I A MA BEL:''' why did you not tell me about this???

'''DOK SNULL:''' quickly i need the papers

'''I A MA BEL:''' yes here are the papers

'''SRRRAH:''' well take back the white house

''{A picture of a cymbal monkey is superimposed upon the screen.}''

''{cut back. Bell looks shocked.}''

'''IM A BELL:''' ... This... this was a bad idea.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' It's ''your'' idea.</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' There's such a thing as regret, you know.</blockquote>

''{cut back again}''

'''KAMGIRO:''' i want pie

'''CON:''' me too

'''WYCOO:''' i want ice cream

'''WAGON:''' i want spaghetti

'''WAGONEKS:''' i want both

''{cuts back for the final time}''

'''IM A BELL:''' ... Yep. A bad idea. Why don't... ''{sighs}'' why don't we just stop now?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' <big>'''STOP THE SHOW?'''</big></blockquote>

''{the credits roll}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKULLB:''' Now I know who to beat with a brick when we're done!</blockquote>
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Can I have it like that? 
'''NOXIGAR:''' You got it like that.</blockquote>

RiffText/MFT3K/Records of Bell/20 - Revision history

Noxigar at 22:31, 14 February 2011