JCM: stupid broken keyboard

2013-12-07T18:41:07Z

stupid broken keyboard

JCM: over and done with

2013-12-07T18:39:47Z

over and done with

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JCM: the things i do for rifftext

2013-12-07T05:15:17Z

the things i do for rifftext

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JCM: Hope this thing publishes

2013-12-07T05:05:13Z

Hope this thing publishes

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BANG! POW! ZING! INSERT SUPERMAN SOUND EFFECT HERE!

<big><big><big><big>GREEN GRASS AND HIGH TIDES FOREVER</big></big></big></big>
----
''{Cut to Emerl and Gemerl in the field.}''

'''EMERL:''' Man, I wish I had a new friend to play with. My YTP friends all keep dying because I lethally harm them.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I wonder why it's hard for you to make friends.</blockquote>

'''GEMERL:''' I feel for ya, brother.

'''EMERL:''' Oh, I wish we had some cool new friend!

'''?????:''' Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah-

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' ????? perfectly represents the anguish I feel when I read this.</blockquote>

''{Jeran falls from the sky and lands flat on his face}''

'''JERAN:''' Ow...did Kass drop me out of a plane?

'''EMERL:''' ''{With only 2 incredibly small eyes on his face}'' ZOHMYGODANEWFRIENDFELLFROMTHESKYKTHXGA4WD.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' PUTTINGTHEWORDSYOUSAYTOGETHERDOESNOTMAKEYOUCOOLALSOKILLYOURSELF</blockquote>

'''GEMERL:''' And who are you?

'''JERAN:''' ''{notices Gemerl}'' AAAH! Wait...you're not Darigan. My name is Jeran.

'''DALEK:''' Oh my. Neopets.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' My thoughts exactly.</blockquote>

'''JERAN:''' Oh my. Doctor Who.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' My exact thoughts.</blockquote>

'''DALEK:''' Goodness Gracious. A Lupe.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Get Out.</blockquote>

'''JERAN:''' Uh...ok. So...nice to meet you all! Wait...what are your names?

'''DALEK:''' I have no name. I'm Dalek. I'm from the 1970's Series.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Which 1970's series? All in the Family?</blockquote>

'''JERAN:''' Nice to meet you, Dalek. ''{to Emerl and Gemerl}'' And what about you two robots?

'''IORI:''' ''{falls from the top of the screen}'' Ow! I'm never skydiving again.

'''JERAN:''' Did you get kicked out of a plane by Kass too?

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Yes. He totally wasn't skydiving, which one would assume from him saying "I'm never skydiving again."</blockquote>

'''IORI:''' No, I went skydiving.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' NO, WE JUST WENT OVER THIS.</blockquote>

Wait, who are you? I haven't seen you around here.

'''JERAN:''' My name is Jeran.

'''IORI:''' Ha, Jeran sounds like a girls name!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm the only fellow who can ridicule people's name here, I-bore-i.</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' ''{comes in}'' Iori, don't insult.... whoever this person is.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' He just said his name was Jeran. I knew you were an idiot, but I didn't know you had short-term memory loss.</blockquote>

He looks like a Neopet.

'''JERAN:''' I am. I've saved lives from evil forces in Meridell, and I had set off on a new quest. The King had ordered me to disgrace Lord Kass, so I got out the old stinkbombs I had when I was young. I spotted his castle on a nearby cliff, and I...erm...slipped.

<blockquote>''{Lightning Guy is heard snoring.}''</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' Ah yes, Meridell.

'''KANO:''' ''{lightning strikes; Kano appears}'' I'M INVINCIBLE!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' ''(wakes up)'' Damn it, Kano! I was planning on sleeping through this entire episode! Why did you have to go and abuse lightning again?</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' ''{to Kano}'' You're a looney. ''{Kano shoots lightning at Patrick who falls over afterwards}'' I'm okay!

'''KANO:''' Who's this?

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' "This" being a pronoun that could apply to anybody, but why not make your readers play the guessing game?</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' Some Lupe knight named Jeran.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' And Jeran wins!</blockquote>

'''JERAN:''' Nice to meet you. ''{thinking}'' Urgh. I don't like this guy...

'''KANO:''' I read your mind, 'foo!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' NO</blockquote>

Why don't you like me? I just met you sorta.

'''JERAN:''' ''{thoughts}'' This guy...he's got quite the power...his power level must be like...over 9000 or something!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm pretty sure he's established that he can read your mind. Also, you suck.</blockquote>

''{normal}'' Sorry for the misunderstanding, Kano. It's nice to meet you.

'''KANO:''' Thank you, I do got quite the power.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' NO</blockquote>

It was nice to meet you too.

'''JERAN:''' So before anyone asks, what kind of stuff do I do?

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Nobody was going to ask.</blockquote>

Well, I'm sick nasty with a sword,

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm sure you are.</blockquote>

I can tear a Mr. Hedgehog into bits,

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm sure you can.</blockquote>

and...I'm pretty dang sweet with a guitar. Yes, I'm not just a Meridell knight.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I'm sure you aren't.</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' Guitar, eh?

'''JERAN:''' Yesh.

'''IORI:''' Your name still sounds like a girl's name!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Iori once again demonstrates her uselessness.</blockquote>

'''PATRICK:''' Be's quiet! ''{punches Iori}''

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' For once, Patrick does something I like...while saying something I hate.</blockquote>

'''GEMERL:''' Now that that's over, ''{Turns arms into machine guns and points at Jeran's face.}'' STATE YOU BUSINESS HERE.

'''JERAN:''' Um...what do you guys do here for a living? What's this show about?

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I don't think even the writers know the answers to those questions.</blockquote>

'''GEMERL:''' I said...STATE...YOUR...BUISNESS.

'''DALEK:''' Actually, you said "State '''YOU''' Business.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Dalek caught a spelling error before me? What messed-up universe am I living in?</blockquote>

...Oh yeah, this is pre-emptive. ''{An Army of Daleks fly in.}''

'''GEMERL:''' I really hate you guys.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' You're not the only one.</blockquote>

'''DALEK:''' We're not big fans of you either! You're rude, arrogant, and annoying!

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' That's just called "blending in with the crowd".</blockquote>

Emerl however, is really cool.

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' That's the first funny thing that anybody's said in this series.</blockquote>

''{Cut to Emerl, slicing his hand off with a katana.}''

'''EMERL:''' ''{Like Salad Fingers}'' I like it when the yellow sparks come out.

''{Cut back.}''

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Did GGaHTF just do a cutaway gag? It is now beyond redemption.</blockquote>

'''DALEK:''' I said he's cool, not smart!

'''GEMERL:''' But he just quoted an unpopular flash series!

'''EMERL:'''...'''{FOURTH WALL BREAKAGE!!!}'''

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' There's nothing annoying about this guy! He's the poster boy for cool!</blockquote>

'''GEMERL:''' Anyways, we still need to sort out what's up with the blue dude.

<blockquote>'''JCM:''' Did somebody ask for me? 
'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Get out of here, JCM. Nobody likes your style.</blockquote>

Why don't you go blow up Hotel Mario and impale Mario and Luigi on a giant needle?

<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Because it's immoral and wrong and</blockquote>

'''DALEK:''' Good idea! ''{Cut to Hotel mario, in which Dalek comes in and blasts it. Mario and luigi fly out, and get impaled into a spike pit.}'' Thanks Scorpion! ''{Cut back.}''

@@ Line 382: / Line 382: @@
 '''IORI:''' No, Mono- yes.
-<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Mono-yes sounds lie a cool game.</blockquote>
+<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Mono-yes sounds like a cool game.</blockquote>
 '''GEMERL:''' You guys can play Monopoly. I'll bet with Emerl.

RiffText/Green Grass and High Tides Forever!/4 - Revision history

JCM: stupid broken keyboard

JCM: over and done with

JCM: the things i do for rifftext

JCM: Hope this thing publishes