RiffText/ChoomWikihood/3 - Revision history

Noxigar at 21:24, 15 November 2011

2011-11-15T21:24:01Z

Noxigar at 06:33, 15 November 2011

2011-11-15T06:33:44Z

Noxigar at 06:31, 15 November 2011

2011-11-15T06:31:18Z

Noxigar: /* Transcript */

2011-11-15T06:25:10Z

‎Transcript

Show changes

Noxigar: Pretending not to know what Proposition 8 is won't work this time

2011-11-15T05:29:45Z

Pretending not to know what Proposition 8 is won't work this time

Noxigar: Hmph. You have to go and remake Choom Wikihood Episode 3? Well I have to go and reriff it.

2011-11-15T05:21:39Z

Hmph. You have to go and remake Choom Wikihood Episode 3? Well I have to go and reriff it.

Show changes

Noxigar: /* Transcript */

2011-02-07T05:26:51Z

‎Transcript

New page

== Summary ==

Chwoka, now blinded, is revealed to be able to hear race.

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Being able to hear race sure sounds fun.</blockquote>

He is admonished by the rest of the group until he saves their lives with his racist superpower.
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Guess who's upset about it. Everyone.</blockquote>

Meanwhile, Bluebry and Nachoman win a free cruise to Glorious Iceland.
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Dare I ask how?</blockquote>

== Transcript Before Chwoka Remade It ==

''{Dinoshaur is representing for the gangstas all across the world}''

'''CHWOKA:''' OH GOD MY EYES THEY CAN'T HANDLE THE GANGSTA

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' ...They also can't handle someone else's superiority complex. People ''pretend'' to be "gangstas" to stroke their own egos.</blockquote>

'''DINOSHAUR:''' "Remember, it is profoundly significant that the only thing over which you have complete control is your own mental attitude." - Shaquille O'Neal

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Exactly how is this quote relevant to anything? We get why Dinoshaur has an unwarranted self-importance?</blockquote>

'''CHWOKA:''' MY EYES AAAAA

''{Chwoka falls over, clutching his eyesockets, blood pouring through his fingertips and onto the shag carpeting. Dinoshaur jerks out of there.}''

'''MEANWHILE AT THE LOBBY WHERE THE MAILBOXES ARE'''
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I'm going to assert that this is Plot B.</blockquote>

''{Bluebry opens the mailbox in slow motion but it is '''action slow motion'''}''

'''NACHOMAN:''' Hey look it's a letter from the president.

''{Nachoman takes the letter out and Bluebry and Nachoman yank the letter back and forth until they both open it together then read it out loud.}''

'''LETTER:''' Dear my fellow Americans, you have been selected by the president because my ''out of control government spending'' is giving you a free trip to Iceland to stimulate the American trans-atlantic flying industry. Hugs and Kisses, Obama.

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' SURE IS POLITICS IN HERE.</blockquote>

''{Bluebry and Nachoman do an anime jump but only ironically so they're still cool and get invited to tons of parties}''

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This... does not matter as far as their "social standing" with the rest of the world is concerned.</blockquote>

== Transcript After ==

== Summary ==

Chwoka, now blinded, is revealed to be able to hear race. He is admonished by the rest of the group until he saves their lives with his racist superpower. Meanwhile, Bluebry and Nachoman win a free cruise to Glorious Iceland.

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' And the plot still gets poorly summarized. Damn shame.</blockquote>

== Transcript ==

''{The kitchen counter is clear, save for a bottle of dishwashing liquid, helpfully labelled “DISHWASHING LIQUID.”}''

'''BLUEBRY:''' ''{off-screen}'' I dare you.

'''NACHOMAN:''' ''{off-screen}'' I double-dog dare you.

'''BLUEBRY:''' ''{off-screen}'' There’s a 5 dollar bill with Abraham Lincoln’s name on it if you do it.

''{Chwoka runs in and chugs the dishwashing liquid,''

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Saves the world the trouble of- OH WHY IN THE HELL WOULD ANYONE DRINK DISHWASHING LIQUID?</blockquote>

''like we all knew he would, because he’s a moron.''
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' ''You'' guys might've thought he'd drink the dishwashing liquid, but ''I,'' the viewer, did not.</blockquote>

''Cut: Stock footage of ambulances. Superimposed text: "BUTTS GALORE." Cut: hospital. Chwoka is in a hospital bed, his head wrapped in bandages. Skub is by his bedside. Skub is very fat, as usual.}''

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I remember Skub being '''SKULLBUGGY,''' not fat.</blockquote>

'''SKUB:''' ''{despondent}'' Why’d you do it? Why would you do this?

'''CHWOKA:''' It’s... all about the Benjamins...

'''SKUB:''' What does that even mean?

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Took the words out of my mouth.</blockquote>

Don’t you die on me!

'''CHWOKA:''' I just want you to know... you were always the fat one to me...

'''SKUB:''' And you were always the stupid loser...

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Good comeback.</blockquote>

''{The doctor walks in.}''

'''DOCTOR:''' Your friend here is going to be fine. There’s no need to be so worried.

'''SKUB:''' How did you do it, doc?

'''DOCTOR:''' The healing power of laughter!

<blockquote>''{Noxigar groans}''</blockquote>

''{Beat.}''

'''DOCTOR:''' Not really. That was a joke. We just pumped his stomach.

'''SKUB:''' Is he going to be okay?

'''DOCTOR:''' I just — I just said that! Look, we were able to get all the dishwashing liquid out before it took much effect. Unfortunately, your friend here will be temporarily blinded. Should clear up by itself. I don’t know why he’s talking with those pauses.

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Dramatic effect.</blockquote>

'''CHWOKA:''' It’s... really... stuffy... in here.

'''SKUB:''' But is he going to be... alright?

'''DOCTOR:''' That’s it, I’m out of here.

''{The doctor ''exeunt.''}''

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Subject-verb agreement has trouble even with the Choom Gang?</blockquote>

'''SKUB:''' Is he going to die?!

''{Cut: The apartment. Skub is leading Chwoka, with bandages over his eyes, and sunglasses over those, into the apartment.

'''CHWOKA:''' I wear my sunglasses at night, so I can, so I can

'''SKUB:''' Shut UP.

'''BROOKSIE:''' ugh it’s chwoka okay guys wrap it up

''{A procession of people in Brooksie's apparent party leave through the front door.}''

'''CHWOKA:''' Blinded by the light! Something something like a thing in the night!

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' OH SHIT, IT'S UNREMEMBERED LYRICS!</blockquote>

'''SKUB:''' Will here is temporarily blinded. And he can’t stop quoting songs about it for one god damn second.

'''CHWOKA:''' Well, I’m out now.

'''BROOKSIE:''' Oh, Bluebry and NachoMan! What will they get into next?

'''SKUB:''' Why don’t we find out?

''{Brooks and Skub look toward the camera with a dead stare and smile. Chwoka tries to locate the camera to stare at it, but can’t find it. Cut: The lobby. Bluebry and NachoMan are in front of the communal mailboxes. They open up their apartment’s mailbox, but accidentally go for it at the same time and end up holding hands. They both blush and look at each other, nervously stammering, but break it off.}''

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Is this...a shipping? Aw, who am I kidding? It'll lead into both of them banishing each other to the Friend Zone and everything will be awkward as hell. I know the writing style of this writer. If they find shippings on other stuff horrifying, then- IT'S PROBABLY A METACONTEXTUAL JOKE OR SOME SHIT OH CRAP WHY AM I STILL NITPICKING THIS?!</blockquote>

'''NACHOMAN:''' Let’s open our mail.

'''BLUEBRY:''' Yes, let’s.

''{Bluebry and NachoMan both try to open and shut their mailbox, but keep trying to go at the same time and it’s really awkward.}''

'''NACHOMAN:''' Oh look it’s a letter from the President

''{Bluebry opens the letter and reads it out loud.}''

'''BLUEBRY:''' “Dear my fellow Americans, you have been selected by the president because my out of control government spending is giving you a free trip to Iceland to stimulate the American trans-Atlantic flying industry. Hugs and Kisses, Obama.”

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' Oh, wait. This line of dialogue. I remember it.</blockquote>

''{Bluebry tosses the letter over his shoulder.}''

'''NACHOMAN:''' I’ve always wanted to go to Iceland.

'''BLUEBRY:''' It could be a nice honeymoon.

''{Pause.}''

'''BLUEBRY:''' Not with you, of course. I mean, with my life partner. For life.

'''NACHOMAN:''' Yes, a life partner, 2 children, and a white picket fence in a safe suburban neighborhood.

'''BLUEBRY:''' Life partners are for life.

'''NACHOMAN:''' Preserve the sanctity of life partners.

'''BLUEBRY:'''Proposition 8.

<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' For some odd reason I get the feeling this isn't funny. Not like it was the previous two episodes, either.</blockquote>

@@ Line 989: / Line 989: @@
 <u>END TAG</u>
-<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This episode demonstrates why I dislike a good majority of the works made by the Choom Gang. Half of the jokes rely on inside material known only to them. When they complain about inside jokes in stuff such as Bell Quest, they would have legitimate arguments except I keep coming back to these as partial reference material for some of my humour. Bluebry's reliance on his homosexuality as humour or as part of a Plot B gets as gritty as his jokes. I'm not kidding. I have seen homosexual characters before and I usually sympathize with their plight and conflict (even in shit such as Glee). Here, I can't do that since Bluebry offers me nothing of which to sympathize ''with''. Skullbuggy teeters between self-sufficient and being Chwoka's bottom bitch who is ever so lost without his pimp. While this would probably make him a dynamic character if done properly, here it makes him look inconsistent as hell as a character and makes me irritated when it comes to the dialogue interactions. Brooksie seems to be just a bizarre perpendicular to NachoMan whenever another character is needed, or otherwise just someone who shows up for whatever reason. And NOID doesn't help his case when he gets hyper-aggressive in her. Yet his best attempt at a "supervillain" idea to counter the Choom Gang ''if they were a parallel to the Power Rangers of all things'' is someone with the "Assboerger" serum (i.e. a serum which doesn't exist; I understand the humour behind it, of course). I can't help but laugh at this, but when dialogue in a fictional work is provided Noid just stops being funny as a character. I noticed this ever since NUCLEAR NOID AND THE ARMAGEDDON TEAM. And let's not forget NachoMan... does he even have ''anything'' funny to say half of the time? I mean, all I got from this episode was that he likes cartoons so damn much. Wouldn't he be like Im a bell but without a fedora? Last of all, Chwoka, you made it a point that you could write better than myself, Lex, and Chaos many times, yet you've just successfully proven the opposite in this work! COME ON, IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF GOOD THEN MY LEVEL OF CRITICAL THINKING MUST SURELY BE INFERIOR TO EVERYONE ELSE'S, DESPITE HOW ECCENTRIC AND OFF-THE-BEATEN-PATH IT IS!<br/>
+<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This episode demonstrates why I dislike a good majority of the works made by the Choom Gang. Half of the jokes rely on inside material known only to them. When they complain about inside jokes in stuff such as Bell Quest, they would have legitimate arguments except I keep coming back to these as partial reference material for some of my humour. Bluebry's reliance on his homosexuality as humour or as part of a Plot B gets as gritty as his jokes. I'm not kidding. I have seen homosexual characters before and I usually sympathize with their plight and conflict (even in shit such as Glee). Here, I can't do that since Bluebry offers me nothing of which to sympathize ''with''. Skullbuggy teeters between self-sufficient and being Chwoka's bottom bitch who is ever so lost without his pimp. While this would probably make him a dynamic character if done properly, here it makes him look inconsistent as hell as a character and makes me irritated when it comes to the dialogue interactions. Brooksie seems to be just a bizarre perpendicular to NachoMan whenever another character is needed, or otherwise just someone who shows up for whatever reason. And NOID doesn't help his case when he gets hyper-aggressive in here. His best attempt at a "supervillain" idea to counter the Choom Gang ''if they were a parallel to the Power Rangers of all things'' is someone with the "Assboerger" serum (i.e. a serum which doesn't exist; I understand the humour behind it, of course). I can't help but laugh at this, but when dialogue in a fictional work is provided Noid just stops being funny as a character. I noticed this ever since NUCLEAR NOID AND THE ARMAGEDDON TEAM. And let's not forget NachoMan... does he even have ''anything'' funny to say half of the time? I mean, all I got from this episode was that he likes cartoons so damn much. Wouldn't he be like Im a bell but without a fedora? Last of all, Chwoka, you made it a point that you could write better than myself, Lex, and Chaos many times, yet you've just successfully proven the opposite in this work! COME ON, IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF GOOD THEN MY LEVEL OF CRITICAL THINKING MUST SURELY BE INFERIOR TO EVERYONE ELSE'S, DESPITE HOW ECCENTRIC AND OFF-THE-BEATEN-PATH IT IS!<br/>
 ''{Noxigar takes a deep breath}''<br/>
 '''NOXIGAR:''' I'll be level and say one or two jokes were funny, albeit for irony reasons. Other than that, I needed to get that all out there. Choom Wikihood is surely not the worst you've come up with, but I find it to border between "awful" and "intentionally bad and still pretty damn hilarious".</blockquote>

@@ Line 989: / Line 989: @@
 <u>END TAG</u>
-<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This episode demonstrates why I dislike a good majority of the works made by the Choom Gang. Half of the jokes rely on inside material known only to them. When they complain about inside jokes in stuff such as Bell Quest, they would have legitimate arguments except I keep coming back to these as partial reference material for some of my humour. Bluebry's reliance on his homosexuality as humour or as part of a Plot B gets as gritty as his jokes. I'm not kidding. I have seen homosexual characters before and I usually sympathize with their plight and conflict (even in shit such as Glee). Here, I can't do that since Bluebry offers me nothing of which to sympathize ''with''. Skullbuggy teeters between self-sufficient and being Chwoka's bottom bitch who is ever so lost without his pimp. While this would probably make him a dynamic character if done properly, here it makes him look inconsistent as hell as a character and makes me irritated when it comes to the dialogue interactions. Brooksie seems to be just a bizarre perpendicular to NachoMan whenever another character is needed, or otherwise just someone who shows up for whatever reason. And NOID doesn't help his case when he gets hyper-aggressive in her. Yet his best attempt at a "supervillain" idea to counter the Choom Gang ''if they were a parallel to the Power Rangers of all things'' is someone with the "Assboerger" serum (i.e. a serum which doesn't exist; I understand the humour behind it, of course). I can't help but laugh at this, but when dialogue in a fictional work is provided Noid just stops being funny as a character. I noticed this ever since NUCLEAR NOID AND THE ARMAGEDDON TEAM. And let's not forget NachoMan... does he even have ''anything'' funny to say half of the time? I mean, all I got from this episode was that he likes cartoons so damn much. Wouldn't he be like Im a bell but without a fedora?<br/>
+<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This episode demonstrates why I dislike a good majority of the works made by the Choom Gang. Half of the jokes rely on inside material known only to them. When they complain about inside jokes in stuff such as Bell Quest, they would have legitimate arguments except I keep coming back to these as partial reference material for some of my humour. Bluebry's reliance on his homosexuality as humour or as part of a Plot B gets as gritty as his jokes. I'm not kidding. I have seen homosexual characters before and I usually sympathize with their plight and conflict (even in shit such as Glee). Here, I can't do that since Bluebry offers me nothing of which to sympathize ''with''. Skullbuggy teeters between self-sufficient and being Chwoka's bottom bitch who is ever so lost without his pimp. While this would probably make him a dynamic character if done properly, here it makes him look inconsistent as hell as a character and makes me irritated when it comes to the dialogue interactions. Brooksie seems to be just a bizarre perpendicular to NachoMan whenever another character is needed, or otherwise just someone who shows up for whatever reason. And NOID doesn't help his case when he gets hyper-aggressive in her. Yet his best attempt at a "supervillain" idea to counter the Choom Gang ''if they were a parallel to the Power Rangers of all things'' is someone with the "Assboerger" serum (i.e. a serum which doesn't exist; I understand the humour behind it, of course). I can't help but laugh at this, but when dialogue in a fictional work is provided Noid just stops being funny as a character. I noticed this ever since NUCLEAR NOID AND THE ARMAGEDDON TEAM. And let's not forget NachoMan... does he even have ''anything'' funny to say half of the time? I mean, all I got from this episode was that he likes cartoons so damn much. Wouldn't he be like Im a bell but without a fedora? Last of all, Chwoka, you made it a point that you could write better than myself, Lex, and Chaos many times, yet you've just successfully proven the opposite in this work! COME ON, IF THIS IS YOUR IDEA OF GOOD THEN MY LEVEL OF CRITICAL THINKING MUST SURELY BE INFERIOR TO EVERYONE ELSE'S, DESPITE HOW ECCENTRIC AND OFF-THE-BEATEN-PATH IT IS!<br/>
 ''{Noxigar takes a deep breath}''<br/>
 '''NOXIGAR:''' I'll be level and say one or two jokes were funny, albeit for irony reasons. Other than that, I needed to get that all out there. Choom Wikihood is surely not the worst you've come up with, but I find it to border between "awful" and "intentionally bad and still pretty damn hilarious".</blockquote>

@@ Line 928: / Line 928: @@
 ''{Skub throws the newspaper like a shotput (after spinning around a few times) and it hits Chwoka in the face.}''
-<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This woulkd be funny if I could ''see'' the slapstick.</blockquote>
+<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' This would be funny if I could ''see'' the slapstick.</blockquote>
 '''CHWOKA:''' Dude. I still have the bandages on.

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 == Summary ==
-Chwoka, now blinded, is revealed to be able to hear race. He is admonished by the rest of the group until he saves their lives with his racist superpower. Meanwhile, Bluebry and Nachoman win a free cruise to Glorious Iceland.
+Chwoka, now blinded, is revealed to be able to hear race.
 == Transcript ==
@@ Line 8: / Line 15: @@
 ''{FADE IN: The kitchen, morning. The kitchen is completely devoid of appliances and dishes, even sinks, save for a jug of dishwashing liquid helpfully labelled "DISHWASHING LIQUID" in big black letters.''
 '''BLUEBRY:''' ''{Off Screen}'' I dare you.
 '''NACHOMAN:''' ''{O.S}'' I double dare you.
 '''BLUEBRY:''' ''{O.S}'' There's a 5 dollar bill with Abraham Lincoln's name on it if you do it.
 ''{Chwoka runs on screen and straight-up downs that dishwashing liquid.}''
 ''{Cut to stock footage of ambulances. Superimposed text: "BUTTS GALORE"}''
@@ Line 26: / Line 36: @@
 ''{Bluebry and NachoMan accidentally go for the same mailbox at the same time and end up holding hands. They blush and begin stammering, and frantically attempt to break it off, each others' frantic efforts countering each other. Eventually NachoMan grabs the only letter in the mailbox. It is entirely unlabeled and he doesn't even look at it.}''
 '''NACHOMAN:''' Oh look it's a letter from the President
@@ Line 40: / Line 52: @@
 ''{Pause.}''
 '''BLUEBRY:''' Not with you I mean. I mean with my life partner. For life.
 '''NACHOMAN:''' Life partners are for life.
-'''BLUEBRY:''' ''{gradually speaking more and more to the camera, but not entirely}'' Yes, a life partner, a white picket fence, and 2.5 children growing up in a safe suburban neighborhood.
+growing up in a safe suburban neighborhood.
 '''NACHOMAN:''' ''{now entirely to the camera}'' Preserve the sanctity of life partners.
 '''BLUEBRY:''' ''{now entirely to the camera}'' Proposition 8.
 ''{Cut: The hospital. Chwoka is bedridden, his head covered entirely by bandages. Skub is kneeling by his bedside.}''