https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=RiffText%2FBling_Emails%2FRecipesRiffText/Bling Emails/Recipes - Revision history2026-04-30T12:08:11ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.28.2https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?title=RiffText/Bling_Emails/Recipes&diff=170536&oldid=prevJCM: bling gets his own daytime cooking show, while lightning guy plays unfitting music2010-12-04T21:42:15Z<p>bling gets his own daytime cooking show, while lightning guy plays unfitting music</p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>== Summary ==<br />
Cooking? Oh Dan...g. OH DANG!<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' I thought you were going to say "Oh Danish!"</blockquote><br />
== Transcript ==<br />
'''BLING:''' Email...<br />
<br />
'''GRUNDY:''' EMAIL...<br />
<br />
'''1-UP:''' EMAIL...<br />
<br />
'''ALL:''' EEEEEEMAIIIIIILLLL!!!!!!<br />
<br />
<blockquote class=bling><br />
<div>subject: pie</div><br />
Dear Bling,<br/><br />
Do you like pie?<br/><br />
What is your favorite flavor of pie?<br/><br />
- Tommyspud<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''BLING:''' Hmm... Pie... ''{cell phone rings, Bling answers it}'' Hello? Yes? Uh huh, that's me. Okay. Yes. Yes. I understand. Alright. Bye. ''{hangs up}'' Guys, I have some news.<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' It's finally over. Finally!</blockquote><br />
'''GRUNDY:''' Uh oh. W-what is it?<br />
<br />
'''BLING:''' I'm kicking you two out of the show.<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Oh. I guess that'll work, too.</blockquote><br />
'''1-UP:''' WHAT?!! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!<br />
<br />
'''BLING:''' I can and I will. The show's only being broadcast in Wiki City now, so, I don't need you two.<br />
<br />
'''GRUNDY:''' Are-are you saying you only kept us here so you could follow 1.6?<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Badly, I must add.</blockquote><br />
'''BLING:''' Yep. Pretty much.<br />
<br />
'''1-UP:''' You can't fire us! We quit! ''{storms out}''<br />
<br />
'''GRUNDY:''' HMPH. ''{follows 1-up}''<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' A dramatic departure will make you no less unemployed. More pathetic? Maybe.</blockquote><br />
''{1-up and Grundy can be seen via the window walking away}''<br />
<br />
'''BLING:''' And now for this. ''{presses a red button beside the Gongy}''<br />
<br />
''{a mushroom cloud can be seen via the window}''<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' This kid is going to grow up to be a serial killer or something.</blockquote><br />
'''BLING:''' Hehehe. ''{typing}'' My flavorite flavor of pie? Well, it's hard to put into words, so I'll show you!<br />
<br />
''{cut to a kitchen. Bling is standing behind a counter wearing a chef's hat}''<br />
<br />
'''BLING:''' It's easier to cook if I do this. ''{transforms into teenage form}'' Good. Now then, ''{Bling gets out what he says}'' First you take a pie crust, three apples, a peach, two bananas, a mango, a cup of subspace, and a cup of milk. ''{gets out a large bowl}'' First, you pour the subspace into a large bowl, followed by the milk. Now, mix them together. ''{does so. everything he says he will do}'' Then, cut up the apples, the peach, the bananas, and the mango. now, the subspace and the milk will need to be put in a blender, and then set on puree. blend them until it's a lavender-colored creme. Now, pour the creme back into the large bowl, and mix them with the fruits we cut up. Now, pour the mixture into the pie crust. put a pie crust on top of it, and bake it with hellfire for one minute. ''{blasts the pie with hellfire via his hand}''<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Congratulations. You can read a cookbook.</blockquote><br />
''{cut to a while. There are now numerous pies on the counter. Bling is cutting them up into slices and putting them on the plates}''<br />
<br />
'''BLING:'''''{takes a piece}'' If anybody in the audience wants a piece, go ahead and take one!<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' There would never be an audience for a show like this.</blockquote><br />
''{numerous people runs onscreen, take pieces of the pie, and run off}''<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' That wasn't an audience. That was a bunch of homeless people who smelled pie.</blockquote><br />
'''BLING:'''''{is eating the pie}'' I learn-Mmph-learned this from-Mmph-Im a bell. He used to-Mmph-feed it to me when I-Mmph-was a little child. Mmph.<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' You stopped eating it, though, when you realized it was causing your explosive diarrhea.</blockquote><br />
''{pan out and rotate camera angle spanning over an audience. the word "bling" appears onscreen. it is golden, Bauhaus 93 font, and is rotated 45 degrees.<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' Specifics are important.</blockquote><br />
an announcer can be heard saying ""bling" will be right back." the screen fades to black. cut via static back to the computer}''<br />
<br />
'''BLING:'''''{typing}'' It's good pie. You should try it.<br />
<blockquote>'''LIGHTNING GUY:''' The explosive diarrhea is awful, though.</blockquote><br />
''{the paper comes down}''<br />
<br />
== Fun Facts ==<br />
=== Real-World References ===<br />
*The "bling" stuff is a reference to various daytime television shows generally aimed towards women.<br />
=== Inside References ===<br />
*the Bauhaus 93 font and the cut-via-static are common on Homestarrunner.com.<br />
=== Easter Eggs ===<br />
*Click on "try it" at the end to have this note pop up;<br />
<pre><br />
Pie Recipe:<br />
<br />
Ingredients:<br />
1 cup milk<br />
1 cup subspace<br />
1 peach<br />
1 mango<br />
2 pie crusts<br />
2 bananas<br />
3 apples<br />
<br />
Procedure:<br />
1. Cut up fruit<br />
2. Blend milk & subspace<br />
3. Mix with fruit<br />
4. Pour into pie crust<br />
5. Put second pie crust on first<br />
6. Bake 1 min with hellfire<br />
</pre></div>JCM