https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=RiffText%2FAruseusEmails%2Ftripleemail3RiffText/AruseusEmails/tripleemail3 - Revision history2026-06-16T08:19:03ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.28.2https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?title=RiffText/AruseusEmails/tripleemail3&diff=180714&oldid=prevNoxigar: I hate these triple email episodes - so much potential that doesn't get used2013-01-03T00:25:45Z<p>I hate these triple email episodes - so much potential that doesn't get used</p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>Cast (in order of appearence): Aruseus, Alpha Stan, Roy Jr, Various Young Children<br />
<br />
Places: Computer Room, Street Corner, The Field<br />
<br />
Date: May 17, 2007<br />
<br />
Computer: A-tech 950<br />
<br />
===Transcript===<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{singing}'' Maybe I'm crazy...for my 37th email...<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' "...in a row..."</blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Hello Aruseus. You have 3 new emails.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Ooh! I'll try a triple email 3.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' I see you've gotten over your fear of doing more than one email? Or is a retcon involved?</blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Go for it.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="aruseus2"><br />
<div>subject: a kid show</div><br />
The coolest guy since Strong Bad---Aruseus,<br/><br />
<br/><br />
I was wondering why you don't have a pre-<br/><br />
schooler show for babies? Would you like to<br/><br />
make one? Maybe toddlers will love you with<br/><br />
fan mail if you do. You can even make a learn-<br/><br />
ing show.<br/><br />
<br/><br />
Allison, NJ<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Learning show for young ones? I think ARUSEUS needs to learn.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Stan...<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' If he says "How is babby formed?" I'm going to have problems.</blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Sorry.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' A kid's show, eh, AllieAllieOxenfree? Well...I guess the kids would love me...<br />
<br />
''{gets up}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' I mean, look at me! I'm huggable!<br />
<br />
''{starts wagging his tail}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' And my tail is waggly too!<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Stop buttdancing.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Technically, that's not buttdancing. Tailwagging is what most dogs do. They do not move their hips, just the appendage near the tail.</blockquote><br />
<br />
''{Cut back to A-Tech}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Yeah, that would be cute, but...I kinda prefer a show for the adolescents, but...I'm not really good with kids that age...<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' "I'm part of Generation IV, which started taking random SomethingAwful memes related to Pokemon and canonizing them."</blockquote><br />
<br />
''{Flashback at the Computer Room, Roy Jr. is jumping on Aruseus' computer desk, laughing}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Get down from there!<br />
<br />
'''ROY JR:''' Never!<br />
<br />
''{Cut back to A-Tech}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Ok. two more.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="aruseus2"><br />
<div>subject: THIS ISN'T MADNESS!</div><br />
THIS IS<br/><br />
<br/><br />
<br/><br />
<br/><br />
<br/><br />
<br/><br />
SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I regret quoting that.<br><br />
'''NAMINE:''' Heh, at least you didn't like Superbad.<br><br />
'''NOXIGAR:''' It's hard to justify a substanceless plot such as "two desperate losers trying to get laid"</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Well, this isn't madness either! THIS IS ''{dramatic pause}'' ARUMAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ''{stops}'' One more.<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="aruseus2"><br />
<div>subject: U R COOL!</div><br />
I LIKE U!<br/><br />
MR. I LIKE U!<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Wow! Another fan? Well, thanks Mr. I Like U. I appreciate it. ''{stops and turns around}'' Hmm...I wasn't done with the first email I got...<br />
<br />
''{Aruseus turns back to the screen}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Hm...Well...I could be one of those costume characters outside of those public places...but...not in costume! <br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NOXIGAR:''' I follow Dante Basco on Tumblr. He is the only one allowed to do pointless ellipses.<br><br />
'''NAMINE:''' Anyway, what are you doing here? Cyrus isn't even in this email.<br><br />
'''NOXIGAR:''' Eh, it'd be out-of-character for you to have a Tumblr and follow Dante Basco. I haven't even seen Hook, and barely have enough knowledge of The Last Airbender to share with you my Zutara dreams.<br><br />
'''NAMINE:''' Did you toke on some bad catnip or something?<br><br />
'''NOXIGAR:''' Reading The Last Airbender's TVTropes page is equivalent to toking on bad catnip. So technically, yes. But about a year ago.</blockquote><br />
<br />
''{Cut to a street corner}''<br />
<br />
'''KID #1:''' ''{offscreen}'' Hey! It's Aruseus!<br />
<br />
'''KID #2:''' ''{offscreen}'' Mom! Get a picture with me and Aruseus! Please!<br />
<br />
''{Cut back to A-Tech}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Well, there you go, Allieisonfire. Me with little guys. Now...back to what I was doing...<br />
<br />
''{Cut to the Field, Aruseus is holding Roy Jr. by the tail, he raises him up}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Who wants this dog?<br />
<br />
'''ROY JR:''' Hey!<br />
<br />
''{Cut back to Computer Room}''<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="astanemail">Click [[Aruseus Emails/Inbox|here]] to email Aruseus.<br><br><br><br></blockquote><br />
<br />
===Fun Facts===<br />
*The "Who wants this dog?" line is one of Ollie Williams' lines in Family Guy.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Was Family Guy ever funny?<br><br />
'''NOXIGAR:''' No.</blockquote></div>Noxigar