RiffText/AruseusEmails/strike - Revision history

Noxigar: /* Part V: The Recieving End Of It All */

2013-04-25T17:00:41Z

‎Part V: The Recieving End Of It All

Noxigar: Screw the fragmentation idea I had five seconds ago!

2013-04-25T03:45:22Z

Screw the fragmentation idea I had five seconds ago!

Noxigar: Yay, a long Aruseus Email! Unfortunately, I'll have to riff it in fragments.

2013-04-25T03:29:47Z

Yay, a long Aruseus Email! Unfortunately, I'll have to riff it in fragments.

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Cast ''{in order of appearance}'': Homestar, Fang, Aruseus, Damocles, Pter, Wolf O' Donnel, Tom, Ert Plus, Lucas Aura, Takuya Rasmuson (for about half a second), The Cheat (Tito)

Places: Dark Room, Aruseus' Room, TLA Kitchen, Computer Room, The Field, Some Jail, Some Forest, Fortress Balcony

Computer: None

Date: March 28th, 2008

== Part I: Fang's Uprising ==

'''HOMESTAR:''' ''{offscreen}'' Previously ''{pronounced like in DNA Evidence}'' on Arumail.exe, in an easter egg accessable through clicking on Algernon...

''{Cut to a dark room, Fang is talking on a communicator}''

'''??????????:''' It'll only be a few more days, Fang. Then we strike.

'''FANG:''' Got it. ''{puts the communicator away}''

''{The screen goes dark}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' Questions arise.

'''VOICE 1:''' Who was that on the communicator?

'''VOICE 2:''' Is Fang evil?

'''VOICE 3:''' Where the crap is my soft drink?

'''HOMESTAR:''' Answers are to be revealed in...The Strike.

''{Fade into Aruseus' room in the morning, Aruseus is sleeping}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{mumbling}'' River...River Raid...

''{Aruseus wakes up and yawns}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, time to do the usual, make breakfast, do stuff, and check email...

''{Aruseus walks into the TLA Kitchen}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, I gotta wait for the toast to pop, so...I'll probably check a quick email.

''{Aruseus walks into the Computer Room and is tackled by Fang}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Fang! What's up with you today? Is it National Glomp Week again?

'''FANG:''' No. I'm afraid your time is up.

'''ARUSEUS:''' My...wha?

'''FANG:''' Aruseus, take a look. There's no one in Free Country today. You're my last target.

''{Cut to a view of The Field, there is no one there}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Woah...you're right. But, what do you mean by "last target?"

'''FANG:''' Aruseus. This will be the last time you will ever see Free Country. My master has ordered me to-

''{the toaster pops}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' It's ready!

''{Aruseus starts to turn back, but Fang grabs his shoulder and takes him}''

'''FANG:''' You're leaving here. Let's go. I don't want to disappoint my master.

'''ARUSEUS:''' But...my toast!

''{Fade to black}''

== Part II: Captured ==

''{Cut to some sort of jail, most of the well known characters are in there, Fang throws Aruseus in the jail}''

'''FANG:''' That's the last of them.

'''????????:''' Pretty good, but I think we're missing a few people.

'''FANG:''' I don't see Ert, Lucas, or Tom.

'''????????:''' No matter. That's only 3 people missing. Three isn't enough to stop an army of thousands.

'''FANG:''' But, Damocles, three is a magic number.

'''DAMOCLES:''' Stop with the references, you insolent fool!

'''FANG:''' Yes, master.

''{Damocles and Fang leave}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well this sucks, here I am captured again.

'''PTER:''' It never seems to end, does it?

'''WOLF:''' I'm a wolf and they didn't accept me! This is madness!

'''PTER:''' THIS IS-

'''ARUSEUS:''' Say Sparta and I'll kill you.

'''WOLF:''' I've got an idea. Wolfs are technically dogs, right?

'''ARUSEUS:''' Biologically, yes.

'''WOLF:''' See the stick?

'''ARUSEUS:''' Aha! That's right!

''{Aruseus picks up the stick and throws it out the cell bars. The wolf guard (Who looks like Fang) starts panting and chases it. Aruseus bends the bars and escapes}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Stay here. If you all escape, they will kill us. If I do, no one will notice.

''{Aruseus bends the bars back to the way they were}''

'''WOLF:''' Good luck.

''{Aruseus runs out a door to the fortress and ends up in a forest}''

'''???:''' Aruseus! You've escaped!

'''??? ????:''' Come on! We gotta plan our strike.

'''?????:''' The army of Damocles will move out any time!

'''ARUSEUS:''' Ok, guys.

== Part III: Conflicts ==

'''ERT PLUS:''' So...what are we going to do?

'''LUCAS:''' Well, they're starting to move out. We better get going. Tom?

'''TOM:''' Here are our weapons. Ert, you'll take the longsword, I've got these arrows, Lucas, use your Aura Tactics, and Aruseus...um...just fight.

'''ARUSEUS:''' I'm just here to look pretty!

'''TOM:''' Well that wasn't the girliest thing you've ever said...

'''ARUSEUS:''' LET'S MOVE OUT!

''{Cut to The Field, the fortress is in view, and several Fang-like wolves are moving out with weapons}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ATTACK!

''{Fierce battle occurs, as we see Damocles and Fang standing atop a balcony}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' Such fools...they think they can stop me...

'''FANG:''' I must say, master, that this plan was a success. It seems the fools who were once my friends cannot stop us.

'''DAMOCLES:''' Soon I shall rule the world, and everyone else will bow down to my might. Wait, what's this!?

''{Cut to a close up of the battle, Ert, Lucas, Tom, and Aruseus are plowing through the troops}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' It seems I've underestimated these people. No matter, they shall die once they reach here.

''{Damocles leaves, cut to The Field at night, Aruseus, Tom, Lucas, and Ert are lying there}''

'''ERT:''' What a battle...

'''LUCAS:''' Of all the things I've been through, that was probably the worst. If Aruseus hadn't ignored the email I sent, none of this would have happened!

'''ARUSEUS:''' So, it's my fault this happened?

'''LUCAS:''' Well, it's not mine!

''{Music starts to play, the song is "Would You Be Impressed?"}''

(These lyrics were from [http://plyrics.com/lyrics/streetlightmanifesto/wouldyoubeimpressed.html PLyrics])

'''LUCAS:'''
 
Would you be upset if I told you we were dying? 
And every cure they gave us was a lie? 
Oh! They mean it when they say we're dead and doomed 
And every single symptom brings us closer to the tomb 
And who will take the credit for our swift impending fall 
Because it's not my fault 

'''ARUSEUS:'''
 
Would you be impressed if I said that the dead would help us counting 
Every single moment that we waste our time? 
All the time we're spending vaccinating this disease 
I just get dizzy when I think of all the ways we try to hide our maladies 
We wine, we dine, and everything is fine 
Because it's not my fault 

'''LUCAS:'''
 
Not you're upset because you finally got the notion 
That everything you had is spinning down the drain 

'''ARUSEUS:'''
 
Oh! Do you mean it when you beg and pray and plead? 
Your "Giveittomegiveittomegiveittomegiveittome all those things we need" 

'''LUCAS:'''
 
And what, pray tell, will you whimper when your number will be called 
you'll say-

'''LUCAS AND ARUSEUS:''' It's not my fault!

'''ARUSEUS:'''
 
Go! Now! The others they'll await you 
And every single one among the lot of you will have your turn 

'''ERT, TOM, AND LUCAS:''' Aye! Aye! Aye! Oh! Oh! Oh!

'''ARUSEUS:'''
 
Like moths that fly into the flame it always ends up so 
You scream: "Not me! Take anybody else! 
Because it's not my fault!" 

''{Fade to the same balcony}''

'''FANG:'''
 
I had a dream last night where everyone was trying 
Subconsciously I knew it was a lie 
And when I woke I knew it was time to pray 
To make amends before the end, before my judgment day 
I looked around, I stood alone, I knew what I had to say 
I said "It's all my fault..." 

== Part IV: The Fall of Damocles ==

''{Cut to the wall of the fortress, Aruseus is climbing it}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{singing quitely}'' Would you be impressed if I said that the dead would help us counting...every single moment that we waste our time? ''{normal}'' Darn! Now It's stuck in my head!

''{Cut to the Balcony}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Fang! Snap out of it!

''{Aruseus rushes to attack Fang, but Fang teleports behind Aruseus}''

'''FANG:''' Fool!

''{Fang grabs Aruseus by the neck}''

'''FANG:''' My master's reign will not end. Once he destroys this land, my empire will grow until the entire universe is in the hands of our empire!

''{Fang throws Aruseus to the ground, knocking him unconscious}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' Yes...Now, Fang, kill him!

''{Fang is about to stab Aruseus in the chest, but he stops}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' What's wrong, Fang? Kill him already!

'''FANG:''' I...I...NO! I will not let you control me like some kind of dog!

'''DAMOCLES:''' What's this!?

''{All of a sudden, the Cosmic T from [[H-Zero GX]] drives towards the fortress}''

'''FANG:''' Lucas!

'''TOM:''' Hold on, guys! BOOST FIRE! FULL POWER!

''{The song "The Meaning of Truth" by HIRO-X starts as the Cosmic T boosts and breaks through the walls, sending the Balcony falling to the ground}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' My empire! MY DREAM!

'''FANG:''' Damocles, going to hell seems to be between you and me!

''{The two jump into the air}''

'''LUCAS:''' Fang! NO!

'''FANG:''' Even when I am gone, my legacy will live on in this world. Lucas Aura, spread my legend to the Wiki User Wiki.

'''DAMOCLES:''' I've had enough of you! DIE!

'''FANG:''' This is the end for you!

''{Fang slashes Damocles with his sword in a "Great Aether" style.}''

'''DAMOCLES:''' RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

''{Zoom out to a view of the fortress, there is a large explosion}''

== Part V: The Recieving End Of It All ==

''{Cut to Aruseus room, Lucas, Tom, and Ert are there}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Wha...what happened?

'''TOM:''' Let's just say, everything is normal again.

'''LUCAS:''' Damocles is gone, and everyone is free.

'''ERT:''' As for Fang, though...well...he... ''{He shakes his head}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' You mean he...

'''TOM:''' It was a noble thing of him to do.

'''ARUSEUS:''' Wait a sec, in the plot of this email, it says Takuya's supposed to come back!

''{Takuya Rasmuson runs across the screen for about half a second}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, I guess it's time to go back to our normal lives, with all of the funny jokes we made.

'''TOM:''' Is it really right to go out with jokes? I mean, Fang just died. For real.

'''ARUSEUS:''' I dunno. Let's ask Tito.

'''THE CHEAT:''' Meh?

''{The End}''

===Fun Facts===

*The Events from the Boost Fire to the end of part 4 are basically identical to the events in
[http://youtube.com/watch?v=Tb3ySqL084c this video.]
*This is the last Arumail...here. 71 will be on the WUW.

@@ Line 345: / Line 345: @@
 '''ARUSEUS:''' Well, I guess it's time to go back to our normal lives, with all of the funny jokes we made.
 '''TOM:''' Is it really right to go out with jokes? I mean, Fang just died. For real.
@@ Line 351: / Line 354: @@
 '''THE CHEAT:''' Meh?
 ''{The End}''

@@ Line 6: / Line 6: @@
 Date: March 28th, 2008
 == Part I: Fang's Uprising ==
@@ Line 26: / Line 28: @@
 '''VOICE 3:''' Where the crap is my soft drink?
 '''HOMESTAR:''' Answers are to be revealed in...The Strike.
@@ Line 44: / Line 49: @@
 '''ARUSEUS:''' Fang! What's up with you today? Is it National Glomp Week again?
 '''FANG:''' No. I'm afraid your time is up.
@@ Line 50: / Line 57: @@
 '''FANG:''' Aruseus, take a look. There's no one in Free Country today. You're my last target.
 ''{Cut to a view of The Field, there is no one there}''
@@ Line 66: / Line 75: @@
 '''ARUSEUS:''' But...my toast!
 ''{Fade to black}''
@@ Line 80: / Line 91: @@
 '''????????:''' No matter. That's only 3 people missing. Three isn't enough to stop an army of thousands.
 '''FANG:''' But, Damocles, three is a magic number.
 '''DAMOCLES:''' Stop with the references, you insolent fool!
 '''FANG:''' Yes, master.
@@ Line 98: / Line 113: @@
 '''ARUSEUS:''' Say Sparta and I'll kill you.
 '''WOLF:''' I've got an idea. Wolfs are technically dogs, right?
@@ Line 108: / Line 125: @@
 ''{Aruseus picks up the stick and throws it out the cell bars. The wolf guard (Who looks like Fang) starts panting and chases it. Aruseus bends the bars and escapes}''
 '''ARUSEUS:''' Stay here. If you all escape, they will kill us. If I do, no one will notice.
 ''{Aruseus bends the bars back to the way they were}''
 '''WOLF:''' Good luck.
@@ Line 136: / Line 157: @@
 '''TOM:''' Well that wasn't the girliest thing you've ever said...
 '''ARUSEUS:''' LET'S MOVE OUT!
@@ Line 156: / Line 179: @@
 ''{Damocles leaves, cut to The Field at night, Aruseus, Tom, Lucas, and Ert are lying there}''
 '''ERT:''' What a battle...
@@ Line 227: / Line 252: @@
 I looked around, I stood alone, I knew what I had to say <br>
 I said "It's all my fault..."<br>
 == Part IV: The Fall of Damocles ==
@@ Line 245: / Line 273: @@
 '''FANG:''' My master's reign will not end. Once he destroys this land, my empire will grow until the entire universe is in the hands of our empire!
 ''{Fang throws Aruseus to the ground, knocking him unconscious}''
@@ Line 259: / Line 289: @@
 ''{All of a sudden, the Cosmic T from [[H-Zero GX]] drives towards the fortress}''
 '''FANG:''' Lucas!
@@ Line 285: / Line 317: @@
 ''{Zoom out to a view of the fortress, there is a large explosion}''
 == Part V: The Recieving End Of It All ==
@@ Line 299: / Line 333: @@
 '''ARUSEUS:''' You mean he...
 '''TOM:''' It was a noble thing of him to do.
@@ Line 305: / Line 341: @@
 ''{Takuya Rasmuson runs across the screen for about half a second}''
 '''ARUSEUS:''' Well, I guess it's time to go back to our normal lives, with all of the funny jokes we made.
@@ Line 321: / Line 359: @@
 [http://youtube.com/watch?v=Tb3ySqL084c this video.]
 *This is the last Arumail...here. 71 will be on the WUW.