Noxigar: Well, I haven't been riffing Aruseus Emails in a while so... I'm riffing this episode.

2013-02-17T09:14:25Z

Well, I haven't been riffing Aruseus Emails in a while so... I'm riffing this episode.

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Cast ''{in order of appearance}'': Aruseus, Algernon, Homestar, King of Town, Tom (easter egg), Homsar (easter egg) Zombie Takuya Rasmuson (easter egg) Lois Griffin (easter egg) Stewie Griffin (easter egg)

Places: Computer Room, AruTopia, The Field, Cemetary (easter egg), Griffin House (easter egg)

Computer: E-Mach 1000

Date: December 6th, 2007

== Transcript ==

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, I haven't been checking my emails in a while so...I'm checking one. ''{clicks the email icon}''

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Well, I haven't been riffing Aruseus Emails in a while so... I'm riffing this episode.</blockquote>

<blockquote class="aruseus3">
<div>Subject: Names</div>
Dear Aruseus.<br />
What's with all this Cool Name I mean Boring Name stuff?<br />
Your pal, Strong Bad. Only Strong Bad.
</blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' Huh? Cool name I mean boring name?

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' And naming your self Arceus wasn't problematic in boringness?</blockquote>

Strong Bad, if you want to tell me something, I live right freaking next door! Anyways, lets move on.

<blockquote class="email" style="background:#393939; text-align:center"><br />
<font size=7>BLORF!</font size><br /><br /></blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' Blorf? Why did...oh...wait. Algernon must be chewing on the power cord to the E-Mach. Hold on, viewers.

''{Aruseus kicks under the desk, a smack is heard}''

'''ALGERNON:''' ''{offscreen}'' BLORF!

''{scurrying is heard}''

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Oh, if only I remembered who Algernon was...</blockquote>

<blockquote class="email" style="background:#393939; text-align:center"><br />
<font size=7>MOVING ON!</font size><br /><br /></blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' There we go.

<blockquote class="aruseus3">
<div>Subject:french</div>
Aruseus,<br>
Pouvez-vous parler français?<br>
Si oui, quel français savez-vous?<br>

De,<br>
Un Certain Type
</blockquote>

''{Aruseus stops after "Pouvez-vous"}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' WHAAAAAAAAAA? I can't understand this! It's like in...Swahili...or something.

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' It's in French, you ignorant piece of-<br>
''{Namine gets the joke. It's still a bad joke, but she got it.}''</blockquote>

Oh well, DELETED!

<blockquote class="email" style="background:#393939; text-align:center"><br />
<font size=7>SUPPRIMÉ !</font size><br /><br /></blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' Next!

<blockquote class="aruseus3">
<div>Subject: cereal</div>
Hey Kuibbi, Tom, and Arueus!
What would you do to make<br>
Cereal funner and gooder?<br>
Cheerios,<br>
Cow Puncher, SB CA
</blockquote>

''{Aruseus says "Kuibbi" as "Koohbuhbee" and "Arueus" as "Aruayus".}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Um...two questions for you! 1. Why do you abuse cows, and 2. DELETED!

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' No question marks? Also that second question wasn't a question, but an interjection.</blockquote>

<blockquote class="email" style="background:#393939; text-align:center"><br />
<font size=7>DELETED!</font size><br /><br /></blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' And who the heck are Kuibbi and Arueus? They sound like...awkward Homsar-ish characters to me. NEXT!

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' So... virtually any other character who isn't you? Only without the Homsar-ish qualities?</blockquote>

<blockquote class="aruseus3">
<div>Subject: creator?</div>
Yo A-man!,<br/>
Are you an Arceus? 'cause I heard they are the creators<br/>
of the world! Do you have the power to create stuff? Like<br/>
an army of clones of you to take over the world?<br/>
Peace to you, Zippy, Tom, and Cyrus,<br/>
LordJ , City of State, HRFWIKI.
</blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' Hey! One I can actually answer! ''{typing}'' Well, I would make more me's, but I wouldn't rule the world! I'd start my own colony, AruTopia!

''{Cut to a field with Aruseus' dream house from [[Aruseus Emails/aot|aruseus of town]].}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{voiceover}'' And the clones would do no work and play all day! It's always something different each season. For winter, they'd do..snow stuff! Sledding, snow angels, snow-me's, you name it!

''{Cut to AruTopian fields, they are covered in snow, and several Aruseus...es are doing things, one is making a snow angel, one is skiing, two are building a snow sculpture of Aruseus}''

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Is this going to be like in Being Malkovich where the only thing they can say is "Aruseus" and the guy gets a splitting headache after entering his own mind?</blockquote>

''{Cut back to the Computer Room}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, someday, I'll build AruTopia. I have a dream...

''{Zoom out to show Homestar standing next to him}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' Who are you supposed to be? Martin Luther King Jr?

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' ...Excuse me while I vomit from the forced joke.<br>
''{Namine vomits from the forced joke.}''</blockquote>

'''ARUSEUS:''' Get out.

''{Homestar leaves}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Next!

<blockquote class=aruseus3><div>KillBots</div>
Dear Aruseus,<br/>
If you were a giant, rampaging KillBot,<br/>
What would you destroy first?<br/>
From,<br/>
Lord Imothy Albert Bellstrom<br/>
P.S. Thank Fang Wolf for giving me a virus-ish email. <sarcasm>I really needed a third virus email.</sarcasm></blockquote>

''{Aruseus ignores the P.S.}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Hehe...funny name. But, I would destroy the King of Town. It's my lifelong dream. Well, next to ''{quickly}'' building AruTopia, opening up a pie shop, becoming an engineer, reviving Takuya Rasmuson from the dead, killing Lois Griffin, becoming a Jedi, making Brian Griffin my Jedi student...

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' I'm going to guess that this guy loves Family Guy and Jedis. He should honestly play a Star Wars tabletop game and leave this referential humour to rot.</blockquote>

''{Fade out and back in}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' ...beating Strong Bad at PS3,

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Strong Bad upgraded from N64?</blockquote>

killing Lois Griffin, and destroying the King of Town.

''{Wave to the Field. The King of Town is walking.}''

'''KOT:''' Doodoodoohoodoo...

''{A metal foot crushes him, zoom out to see a giant robot Aruseus}''

'''KILLBOT ARUSEUS:''' ''{mechanical voice}'' I RULE THE SCHOOL!

<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Really? That's the best one-liner you've got? "I RULE THE SCHOOL"?</blockquote>

''{Cut back into the Computer Room, the words from before are still there}''

'''ARUSEUS:''' Well, that wraps that email up. See ya, guys!

''{The Paper comes down}''

===Easter Eggs===
*Click on Aruseus when he says "awkward Homsar-ish characters" to see a picture of Tom standing with two Homsars, one dressed as Kyubii, the other as Aruseus.
*Click on "Takuya Rasmuson" to see an extra scene.
:''{Cut to a cemetary, Aruseus is standing outside of Takuya Rasmuson's grave, peeking into a hole he dug. A Zombie version af Takuya with exposed bones on his arm, a ripped shirt, and ruffled fur pops out}''

'''ZOMBIE TAKUYA:''' BLAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

'''ARUSEUS:''' AAAH!! ''{smacks Zombie Takuya with a broom repeatedly}''

*Click on "Lois" to see an extra scene.

''{Cut to Peter Griffin's House, Lois is walking up to Stewie}''

'''LOIS:''' Come here, mommy's gonna change-

''{A large metal foot crushes Lois}''

'''STEWIE:''' I say...it's a dream come true!

<blockquote>''{Namine vomits from the other forced joke.}''</blockquote>

RiffText/AruseusEmails/inboxclean - Revision history

Noxigar: Well, I haven't been riffing Aruseus Emails in a while so... I'm riffing this episode.