https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?action=history&feed=atom&title=RiffText%2FAruseusEmails%2FfootballRiffText/AruseusEmails/football - Revision history2026-04-11T19:01:48ZRevision history for this page on the wikiMediaWiki 1.28.2https://wuw.clamburger.org/w/index.php?title=RiffText/AruseusEmails/football&diff=181030&oldid=prevNoxigar: That's a stone, Luigi. You didn't make it.2013-04-26T21:54:39Z<p>That's a stone, Luigi. You didn't make it.</p>
<p><b>New page</b></p><div>Cast ''{in order of appearance}'': Aruseus, Wolf<br />
<br />
Places: The Boardwalk, The Beach<br />
<br />
Computer: E-Mach 1000<br />
<br />
Date: August 1st, 2008<br />
<br />
== Transcript ==<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{singing}'' Shaaaaaaaaaaaaake your booty...Email domination!<br />
<br />
''{Aruseus clicks the email icon}''<br />
<br />
<blockquote class="aruseus3"><br />
<div>subject: football</div><br />
Aruseus; mah main man,<br />
<br />
I want to make sure if you play any football?<br/><br />
Please be a football player? if you do, we'll<br/><br />
love you.<br/><br />
<br />
-Paul mcAlba<br />
</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Oh no, Paul McAlba, no Paul McAlba, no. There's noooooooooooo way I will play football for you.<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Why not?<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' ''{imitating Arceus}'' Because only dumb jocks play football and I'm not a dumb jock!</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' I suck at it. I don't know a thing.<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Listen, I'll teach you.<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Really?<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Yeah. To the beach!<br />
<br />
''{They hop the fence behind them. You hear a thud}''<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Ow...need to work on my landing...<br />
<br />
''{Cut to the Beach}''<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Ok. So...here's the ball.<br />
<br />
''{Wolf pulls out a soccer ball}''<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' This already isn't funny, and I don't even grasp how the punchline's going to work out.</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Uh...Wolf?<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Now, what you do is you have two goals, and you need to kick this ball into the other goal.<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Wolf, that's-<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Now in each goal, there is a goalie. He can pick up the ball with his hands while the other players can't.<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' That...that's not-<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Look, what are you trying to say?<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' That's soccer.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Which is commonly known as football outside of the United States.</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Oh, yeah. I'm thinking of England. I don't know a thing.<br />
<br />
''{Aruseus kicks the ball into Wolf's head and leaves}''<br />
<br />
'''WOLF:''' Ow...do I always get hurt?<br />
<br />
''{A Mr. Weight falls on Wolf}''<br />
<br />
''{Cut to the Arcade, Ryan is playing Megaman: The Power Battle}''<br />
<br />
'''RYAN:''' Die, Crashman!<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Hey Ryan!<br />
<br />
'''RYAN:''' Kinda busy now...<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' That's not being busy. At all.</blockquote><br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Ok. ''{leaves}''<br />
<br />
''{Cut to the Shorehouse, Dan is recording himself singing "Video Killed The Radio Star" at a high pitch. He is also wearing a wig}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' Not even gonna ask...<br />
<br />
''{Cut back to the E-Mach}''<br />
<br />
'''ARUSEUS:''' ''{typing}'' Well, I can't play football. So...go away. <br />
<br />
''{The Paper}''<br />
<br />
===Easter Eggs===<br />
<br />
*Click on "well" to bring up this video.<br />
<br />
{{YouTube|Oh4Szvvgrb8}}<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' Agh, no! The horrors of speeding things up to make them sound Chipmunk-ish! Why? Why?</blockquote><br />
<br />
===Fun Facts===<br />
*Good Deal Dan is known on Youtube for gracing his friends with double-time songs.<br />
*OBLIGATORY MICAH REFERENCE.<br />
<br />
<blockquote>'''NAMINE:''' What MICAH reference?</blockquote></div>Noxigar