Chwoka: Created page with ''''Zarel E-Mail #4''' Zarel is asked to find a cave and explore it.
'''SKUB:''' He once again dodges the question and instead does a Mega Man speedrun...'

2010-05-09T23:50:23Z

Created page with ''''Zarel E-Mail #4''' Zarel is asked to find a cave and explore it. <blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' He once again dodges the question and instead does a Mega Man speedrun...'

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'''Zarel E-Mail #4'''

Zarel is asked to find a cave and explore it.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' He once again dodges the question and instead does a Mega Man speedrun.</blockquote>

'''Cast (in order of appearance):''' Zarel, Strong Bad, TJ,

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' AWE MAN, I LOVE TJ</blockquote>

Homsar, Strong Mad

'''Places:''' Zarel's House, Strong Mad's Room (exterior),

<blockquote class="mft3k"> '''BLUEBRY:''' so ''a hallway''</blockquote>

The Field

==Transcript==

''{Cut to Zarel's Room}''

'''ZAREL:''' This episode of Zarel E-Mail is brought to you by ''Auntie Grem's Salty Cheese Puffs.''

<blockquote class="mft3k"> '''BLUEBRY:''' i just buy the kroger brand ones</blockquote>

''{holds up back of said namesake}'' Auntie Grem's; Because heart attacks are a priority!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' I hope he gets one.</blockquote>

<blockquote class=zarel><div>subj: spelunk</div>
Dear Zarel; 
Go find a cave and go into the cave and find treasure. 

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Awww yeah. You know what kind of treasure I'm talking about.</blockquote>

- Zippy P.</blockquote>

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Whose Zippy.</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' ''{typing}'' It wouldn't kill you to say please, y'know. But you're a first timer, so I'll give you a chance.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Is he being a gen-ist?</blockquote>

''{clears screen}'' So...you want me to go spelunking, do ya? ''{pronounces it "Spell-unk-ing"}''

<blockquote class="mft3k"> '''BLUEBRY:''' um that's how you're supposed to pronounce it</blockquote>

Promblem

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' I HAVE PROMBLEMS</blockquote>

is there's a galactically small chance of there being any caves here.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' ''{Zarel boots up his NES.}'' '''BLUEBRY:''' make a fort out of couch cushions</blockquote>

The closest to a cave in here is-

''{Cut to a shot of the outside of Strong Mad's room, the door is shut, and green fumes emit from the doorway}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' COMMAS I NEED MORE! MORE COMMAS! SO MANY COMMAS!</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' ''{voiceover}'' Strong Mad's room, which has a stench of botanically uncanny levels of mass stank.

<blockquote class="mft3k"> '''BLUEBRY:''' because apparently caves smell</blockquote>

You'd either have to be crazy, insane, stupid, Stormtrooper, or World War I soldier to go in there;

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' '''''IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE IT'S RANDOM'''''</blockquote>

whatever gets you a complimentary gas mask or death from intoxication.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Man, Strong Mad got the ''stink'' in there</blockquote>

'''STRONG MAD:''' ''{inside}'' IT SMELLS LIKE MY MOM'S COOKING!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Mmmm, brownies</blockquote>

''{Cut back to the Cappy}''

'''ZAREL:''' ''{typing}'' Woah. This is not a job to do alone. I'm going to need to call upon the best spelunkers we have here! ''{hops out of chair}'' Huttah!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' A PERFECT 10, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT, UKRAINE DOES IT AGAIN</blockquote>

''{Cut to the field. Zarel is wearing a bucket on his head''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' The bucket may very well actually be his head.</blockquote>

''and holding a baseball bat}''

'''ZAREL:''' Alright, you worms! We are about to venture into the most deepest, dankest, Danke-est

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Is it just me or has war made this man '''bitte'''r??? '''NACHOMAN:''' I don't Get it.</blockquote>

cave ever seen 'round these parts! Gentlemen, do you have what it takes?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' "STEP RIGHT UP, STEP RIGHT UP"</blockquote>

''{Cut to a shot of Strong Bad, TJ, and Homsar standing in a line, Strong Bad is wearing a hard hat and wielding a lead pipe, TJ has no weapon, but is donning a yellow checkered fedora,''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''{dry heave}'' what is this 2006</blockquote>

''and Homsar is wearing a shower cap and wielding a wet towel}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' For whippings.</blockquote>

'''TJ:''' Alright, I'm going to give you five seconds to tell me what I'm doing here.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Standing around, making a fool out of yourself.</blockquote>

I don't even want to go in there! It reeks!

'''ZAREL:''' You...have good navigation skills?

'''TJ:''' I'm outta here.

'''STRONG BAD:''' TJ has a point,

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' "and I've known him since diapey school so I know he's a legitimate character!!"</blockquote>

and I know my brother more than anyone here because I do.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' and I did.</blockquote>

Strong Mad's room isn't called "Rotten Egglund" for kicks, you know.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' it is '''very''' serious. it held a seat in the unsc in 1968</blockquote>

I've...shudder shudder...been in there...shudder...jibblie.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' I like Strong Mad's street sign. I want one. "Skub Boulevard". '''CHWOKA:''' Skub Boulevard sounds like the place where dreams go to die and women go to get violations.</blockquote>

'''TJ:''' So yeah, me and the Bad here are out.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' that was—</blockquote>

You wanna go to the not-as-smelly King of Town's castle and make it smellier?

'''STRONG BAD:''' Crap to the yes. Let's ditch this Pop Rocks stand.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Is there such thing as a Pop Rocks stand? Because that sounds cool too. '''CHWOKA:''' "STEP RIGHT UP! STEP RIGHT UP!"</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' What? You're going to a castle with a guy shoveling crap outside and you call it not smelly?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' dude castles are nice</blockquote>

'''STRONG BAD:''' Oh, dragon-man. Trust me, I'd rather be bathing in whatsit than bathing in Egglund stench.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' their primary export, nearly tied with counterfeit dvds</blockquote>

'''TJ:''' Yeah, me too.

''{They walk away}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ''backwards''</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' ''{leaning back}'' Ew...Anyway, you're my only brave man left! Would you like to go with?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' so about your grammar</blockquote>

'''HOMSAR:''' DaaaaaAAAAaaahm sorry, Falcor, but my stands are baby-soft. ''{tosses towel in the air and it lands on his head, walks away}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Even the stupid one doesn't like him let's face it, he's screwed royally. '''CHWOKA:''' Something about the King of Town and "screwed royally"! '''NACHOMAN:''' What? '''CHWOKA:''' I—I'm sorry, I just couldn't...</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' Well...fine then! Forget all y'alls! I'm gonna go check this out on my own, and you'll all be jealous when I make out with all the hot chicks in there!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Oh Lord, is ''that'' the Yellow Dragon Action? Forget this, I'm bailing while I can. ''{Skub attempts to get up, but can't because of his own weight I mean DAMN.}'' '''BLUEBRY:''' ''bailing like the fat cats in washington with our money" '''BLUEBRY:''' also spoilers: no hot chicks in there '''BLUEBRY:''' also they wouldn't get with him anyway like no offense or anything they're just humans</blockquote>

''{to self}'' To be honest, with a stench like that they could've mutated to acid-spitting monsters...

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' ''{as Zarel}'' PERFECT! '''BLUEBRY:''' "my basic rule is that if it's got a tail"</blockquote>

Oh well, they're still girls.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Hahahahaha, okay</blockquote>

''{Cut to the exterior of Strong Mad's room, Zarel, still armed and equipped, approaches the door}''

'''ZAREL:''' Okay...here we go... ''{opens the door and walks in}''

''{the screen fades out to black}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Zarel's body was recovered 4 months later.</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' ''{voice only}'' Hello? Anyone in here?

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' well if you're to be trusted there are women in here</blockquote>

''{footsteps are heard}'' Who's there? ''{footsteps get louder and faster}'' Who's that?!

'''STRONG MAD:''' RAAAAAAAH!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' RIPLEY LOOK OUT</blockquote>

'''ZAREL:''' Eep.

''{Cut back to Zarel's room}''

'''STRONG MAD:''' ''{offscreen}'' STAY OUT OF MY ROOM!

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' Hey! Hey! You! Get outta my room!</blockquote>

''{Zarel crashes through the window, as if thrown.''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''because he was thrown get it''</blockquote>

''He lands on the ground, covered in bumps and bruises}''

''{Cut back to the Cappy}''

'''ZAREL:''' ''{typing}'' Urgh...I think my...ribula is...broke.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Is there a restaurant called Ribula's yet? Because I want the rights. '''CHWOKA:''' Steak 'n' Steins.</blockquote>

Zippy...you owe me a medical bill...and a gas mask...and maybe some gauze.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' To pick up the broken pieces of his heart.</blockquote>

Please, please bring some gauze. Urg... ''{falls over}''

''{The Paper}''

==Easter Eggs==
*Click on Zarel when he says "Danke-est" to bring up a card for "Der Pooher's Toilet Cleaning: We Get Even the Danke-est of Smells Out!"
*Click on "ribula" for a scene.

===Easter Egg Transcript===

''{cut to a Table, where a bag of Auntie Grem's Salty Cheese Puffs sits.}''

'''ANNOUNCER:''' Auntie Grem's Salty Cheese Puffs! Because heart attacks are a priority! ''{quietly and quickly}'' Now fudge-dipped!

''{Hot fudge covers the bag}''

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Well it's not as good as ''Pocky'', but</blockquote>

==Fun Facts==
*Danke is a German word meaning "Thank you." "Der Pooher" is a play on "Der Führer", a term Adolf Hitler was called, and the word "poop."

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' Godwin's Law wins out again!! ''{[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MReV9dkAVhY This]}'' '''NACHOMAN:''' W-what is this? '''CHWOKA:''' You've done it now, Skub. You in the drink. '''SKUB:''' What's going on?! '''CHWOKA:''' YOU IN THE DRINK. '''SKUB:''' WHAT'S THE DRINK?</blockquote>

*"Ribula" is a portmanteu

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''BLUEBRY:''' ''portmanteau''</blockquote>

of "fibula" and "rib."
*Zarel talks about how the hot girls he believes lurk in Strong Mad's room have muted into "acid-spitting monsters." This is a hint toward Spitters, one of the Special Infected found in the Valve game, Left 4 Dead 2.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''SKUB:''' DO YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE VALVE MADE??? THAT'S RIGHT, TEAM FOTERESS 2</blockquote>

*World War I soldiers used gas masks to evade poison gas.

<blockquote class="mft3k">'''CHWOKA:''' I was under the impression they just dodged. Y'know, bob and weave. '''BLUEBRY:''' "i wonder how i can show my internet friends that i paid attention in school today"</blockquote>

*Falcor is the name of the dragon in ''The Neverending Story.''

Mystery Fanstuff Theater 3000/Zarel Emails/4 - Revision history

Chwoka: Created page with ''''Zarel E-Mail #4''' Zarel is asked to find a cave and explore it. '''SKUB:''' He once again dodges the question and instead does a Mega Man speedrun...'

Chwoka: Created page with ''''Zarel E-Mail #4''' Zarel is asked to find a cave and explore it.
'''SKUB:''' He once again dodges the question and instead does a Mega Man speedrun...'