JCM at 00:37, 26 September 2008

2008-09-26T00:37:54Z

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JCM finds a map and looks for treasure buried in the school.

== Movie ==

''{JCM walks into the house covered in mud.}''

'''JCM:''' Worst. Day. Ever. I hope I never have to go to school again.

''{The window behind him shows the sun going down, the moon coming up, the moon coming down, and the sun coming back up all in 5 seconds.}''

'''JCM'S FATHER:''' JCM, time for school!

'''JCM:''' Oh, come on!

''{Cut to the Homestar Runner Fanstuff School. JCM walks in with fresh new clothes on, shining teeth, and a dry expression.}''

'''JCM:''' Let's just get this over with.

''{It's dot com walks onscreen with a camera.}''

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' Let's just get this over with.

'''JCM:''' ''{surprised}'' You don't have to be in such a rush. Wait? What hypocritical thing am I saying?

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' Say "the fanstuff pays It's dot com too little for this dumb job".

''{JCM quickly changes from his dry expression to his happy expression.}''

'''JCM:''' The fanstuff pays It's dot com too little for this dumb job!

''{It's dot com flashes the camera at JCM, causing JCM to be dazed for a second.}''

'''JCM:''' Did you just hypnotize me?

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' I know no such thing. See ya.

''{It's dot com runs offscreen with the camera.}''

'''JCM:''' Well, now that I'm done with that, time to make some fanstuff!

''{JCM walks off and then slips on a piece of paper.}''

'''JCM:''' What the? Hey, It's dot com, you dropped this! It seems he's long gone. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if I took a peek at this.

''{JCM looks at the paper and his eyes grow ride.}''

'''JCM:''' This is directions to an X. What could that X mean? This looks like a job for the One who know all.

''{Cut to a picture of Homestar.}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' Yes?

'''JCM:''' What is this map for?

'''HOMESTAR:''' A bunch of dots going to an X.

'''JCM:''' ''{dry}'' I know that. But, what does the X mean?

'''HOMESTAR:''' X-ray.

'''JCM:''' Those are illegal in this city.

'''HOMESTAR:''' Xylophone?

'''JCM:''' What's that? All I know is that there is not one in this school.

'''HOMESTAR:''' I know! Excellency!

'''JCM:''' Doesn't that start with an e?

''{Homestar pauses and JCM facepalms.}''

'''HOMESTAR:''' I've got nothing.

'''JCM:''' I still don't know why everyone calls you the one who knows all.

'''HOMESTAR:''' Because I have dibs on that name, of course!

'''JCM:''' Well, hopefully, that's one thing you know.

''{JCM walks offscreen and Homestar blows up in a fiery explosion.}''

''{Cut to the computer room. JCM looks up map and X on Google.}''

'''JCM:''' Let's see. Pirate site, pirate site, pirate site, pirate site...I see something wrong.

''{It's dot com walks onscreen with pirate clothes on. JCM turns and sees him.}''

'''JCM:''' It's dot com?

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' What, JCM?

''{JCM shakes his head and looks at It's dot com more closely.}''

'''JCM:''' Uh, nothing...I'm just going to go...run the heck away from you.

''{JCM screams and runs onscreen. It's dot com scratches his head with his hook.}''

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' What's his problem?

''{Cut to the bathroom. JCM is looking at the map.}''

'''JCM:''' Buried treasure...in this school? If I find it, I'll be...

''{Zoom out to show Kirbychu walking inside.}''

'''JCM:''' Filthy...stinking...

''{Kirbychu walks back out awkwardly.}''

'''JCM:''' Rich!

''{JCM runs out of the bathroom with the map in his hand.}''

'''JCM:''' I'll have to find this treasure before someone else finds out about it!

''{Zoom out to show all of the fanstuff students around JCM.}''

'''JCM:''' Ignore anything I said about treasure. I was drunk at the time.

'''CHAOS:''' Which was 5 seconds ago?

'''JCM:''' Yes...don't judge me.

''{All the kids shrug with "whatever"s and leaves.}''

'''JCM:''' ''{relieved}'' Phew! Now, on the go!

''{JCM starts walking again.}''

''{Cut to a big red "X".}''

'''JCM:''' I made it!

''{JCM takes a shovel out of his shirt pocket. He hits the ground with it and it breaks in half.}''

'''JCM:''' Oh dear.

''{JCM takes out a saw and tries to saw the floor. The saw breaks in half. JCM takes out a chainsaw and tries to cut the floor. It explodes.}''

'''JCM:''' Why don't this stupid floor break?!

''{JCM takes out a bomb, lits it, then covers his ear.}''

''{Cut to an explosion.}''

''{Cut back. JCM face is blackened and everything around him except the X is gone.}''

'''JCM:''' Crud!

''{JCM kicks the X and it breaks off, revealing a treasure chest.}''

'''JCM:''' ...Oh.

''{JCM opens the chest excitingly to find a piece of paper in it.}''

'''JCM:''' ''{reading}'' "Congratulations on finding the treasure map." The map I found was just a map to the real treasure map?

''{JCM's face melts off.}''

''{Cut to JCM walking in a hallway. He looks at the map again and trips.}''

'''JCM:''' Hi, floor, this is an unsavory position, isn't it? But, don't worry, it'll all be worth it when I see all that gold!

''{JCM gets back up.}''

'''JCM:''' Anyway, this map cannot be right. This is the basement of the school. It's older than life itself. Maybe even...my mom.

'''JCM'S MOTHER:''' ''{offscreen}'' I heard that!

''{JCM gulps and then walks into the basement. Every step he takes, a creak is heard.}''

'''JCM:''' Man, these steps ''are'' old.

''{When JCM stops, the creaks are still heard.}''

'''JCM:''' ''{confused}'' Huh?

''{Zoom up to show the wind blowing a broken light hanging from the ceiling. It makes the creaking noise every time it moves.}''

'''JCM:''' Wait, where's the wind coming from?

''{Zoom up to show a broken window and a rat on it breathing heavily.}''

'''JCM:''' OK, that didn't need to be seen. Now, time for the treasure!

''{JCM starts running to other parts of the basement. He then sees an "X" and starts running toward that.}''

'''JCM:''' Aha!

''{Suddenly, a ghost appears in front of JCM.}''

'''JCM:''' ''{screams}'' A ghost!

'''GHOST:''' Aye, ye scurvy dog. Stay the ''{a loud creak is heard}'' away from me booty!

'''JCM:''' ''{awkwardly}'' I didn't want your butt. I wanted your treasure.

'''GHOST:''' That's what I said! Me booty!

'''JCM:''' Yeah, OK.

''{JCM walks around the ghost and toward the "X" and the ghost stops him again.}''

'''JCM:''' Do you have something against me?

'''GHOST:''' Didn't I tell ye not to touch my loot?!

'''JCM:''' No, you told me not to touch your bottom, which I didn't.

''{The ghost facepalms.}''

'''GHOST:''' The treasure is mine, OK?

'''JCM:''' Not OK. You're dead, for pete's sake! What could you do with the treasure?

'''GHOST:''' I be warning ye because I'll be forced to haunt ye if ye ever got ye dirty hands on me treasure.

'''JCM:''' What are you talking about? My hands are clean!

''{JCM rises up his shining hands.}''

'''GHOST:''' Ah, ye know what I mean!

'''JCM:''' So, can I get the treasure now?

'''GHOST:''' No!

'''JCM:''' What about now?

'''GHOST:''' No!

'''JCM:''' Now?

'''GHOST:''' No! Ye can't have me treasure ever!

'''JCM:''' ...Is now a good time?

'''GHOST:''' Arrgh! When will ye hardheaded self realize that ye can never have me treasure!

'''JCM:''' So, when does never end?

'''GHOST:''' NEVER!

'''JCM:''' OK, I'll wait until then.

'''GHOST:''' OK, if ye want my treasure so badly, ye can win it in a fight.

'''JCM:''' But, I'll get my hands dirty!

'''GHOST:''' Just do it!

'''JCM:''' Mkay.

''{JCM takes a jar out of his hand and traps the ghost in it.}''

'''GHOST:''' Oh, shiver me timbers!

'''JCM:''' OK, I'm going to get that treasure now!

''{JCM picks the giant treasure chest up without any strain and puts it safely in his shirt pocket.}''

'''GHOST:''' So, when is ye going to get me out of this jar.

'''JCM:''' ''{thinks}'' Umm...never.

'''GHOST:''' So, when does never end?

''{Cut to JoeyDay's office. JCM walks in.}''

'''JCM:''' Hey, look what i found!

''{JCM takes the treasure chest out of his pocket.}''

'''JOEYDAY:''' Wow! You're going to donate an entire treasure chest to us?

'''JCM:''' Heck no! I just wanted you to thank It's dot com for me.

'''JOEYDAY:''' Umm, sure. But, first, why don't I just look what what inside.

''{JCM opens the treasure chest to reveal it being full of doubloons.}''

'''JCM:''' Cool, isn't it? And it only cost me a jar and a ghost!

'''JOEYDAY:''' JCM, are you sure that's real?

'''JCM:''' Of course! What would make you think otherwise?

'''JOEYDAY:''' The Hershey's logo on it.

'''JCM:''' What?

''{JCM tears off the wrapper of one "doubloon" and panic.}''

'''JCM:''' NOOOOOOOOO! I'm allergic to chocolate.

''{It's dot com walks onscreen.}''

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' JCM, what are you doing with my chocolates?

'''JOEYDAY:''' Wait a minute...I thought you told me to ban chocolate from the school!

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' ''{worried}'' Um, darn! We must've missed one, then! Heh, heh. ''{quietly}'' And I thought I had a ghost to protect it.

'''JCM:''' Well, at least I still have my ghost!

''{JCM takes out the jar with the ghost in it.}''

'''GHOST:''' You want your money back, don't you?

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' I have no idea who you are, but yes.

'''JCM:''' Well, since everything's sorta explained, why were you dressed up as a pirate, DC?

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' It's Halloween today. Duh.

'''JCM:''' Oh, yeah! That's why I dressed up like a gentleman this morning!

'''IT'S DOT COM:''' Wasn't that for the school picture?

'''JCM:''' It's the same kind of scary.

''{The End}''

JCMovies/6 - Revision history

JCM at 00:37, 26 September 2008