JCM: /* Movie */

2009-12-05T18:43:24Z

‎Movie

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The Good Deal Band comes to the Homestar Runner Fanstuff School.

== Movie ==

''{The Homestar Runner Fanstuff students are in the auditorium.}''

'''JOSHUA:''' Hello, everybody! Today we have a new student here.

''{The few scattered claps are heard.}''

'''JOSHUA:''' His name is Good Deal Dan and he's here with his band!

''{Dan, Pete, and Alfonzo walk onstage.}''

'''JCM:''' A band? Yay! I love bands! And not the kind where I'm not allowed to come to the school for all eternity either! Because those kinds of bans aren't as awesomely fun!

'''DAN:''' Thanks! I think. We may not be big yet, but we're coming close! Listen!

''{The Good Deal Band play the song from their YouTube video. When they finish, the kids start cheering.}''

'''DAN:''' ''{laughs}'' I love the sweet sound of gratitude.

'''JCM:''' I didn't know gratitude sounded like applause.

'''DAN:''' It was a figure a figure of speech, you see.

'''JCM:''' Oh! Well, I'm grateful too, then. Just not applauding because I don't have palms and all! Anyway, I think the band sounds kind of dull without a drum player.

'''DAN:''' Well, that's one of the reasons I came here. We're hiring a drum player.

''{JCM's face gets an abnormally large smile as he grabs two glowing chopsticks from his pocket and holds it in the air.}''

'''JCM:''' ''{masculine voice}'' I MUST BE THAT DRUMMER!

''{Dan looks at JCM awkwardly.}''

'''DAN:''' Um, aren't those chopsticks?

'''JCM:''' Yeah, I left my drumsticks at home. Got this out of someone's back pocket the second I heard of your appearance. I'm sure he won't mind.

''{A chinese man walks onscreen.}''

'''CHINESE MAN:''' So you the one who took my chopsticks!

''{The chinese man takes the chopsticks out of JCM's hand and hits JCM with them repeatedly.}''

'''JCM:''' Ow! I'm not a drum.

'''CHINESE MAN:''' I use these to eat!

''{The chinese man hits JCM with a chopstick one more time then leaves.}''

'''JCM:''' Man, those Asian people are strange. Drumsticks to eat?

''{Dan facepalms and gives JCM drumsticks out of a bag.}''

'''DAN:''' Just give me what you got before I start regretting this?

'''JCM:''' But I have a lot of thing.

'''DAN:''' I mean play the drums!

'''JCM:''' Oh. Alright.

''{JCM walks up to the stand where a drum is rolled in front of him by Pete and Alfonzo. JCM raises his sticks above the drum and-}''

''{Cut to a blue screen of text with the words repeated by a narrator.}''

'''NARRATOR:''' Because of concerns from parents about their children's psychological state and their cats' physical state after listening to a blue dude play a bunch of loud, off-key, and pretty much terrible notes on a drum, this scene has been removed. Please enjoy this video as you wait.

''{Generic Stinkoman Comic #12 is played in animation form.}''

'''NARRATOR:''' We may now resume JCMovies. Thank you for your patience.

''{Cut back to the auditorium. Everyone is on the ground cringing with their hands on their ears. JCM looks around.}''

'''JCM:''' Wow, they're dancing to my rhythm!

'''DAN:''' ''{high-pitched}'' No, their ears are bleeding.

'''JCM:''' ''{embarrassed}'' Oh, I guess I rocked too much.

'''DAN:''' ''{angry}'' Rocked too much?! You're the worst player I've ever heard! Does anyone else want to do this?

''{Strong Intelligent comes in out of nowhere.}''

'''STRONG INTELLIGENT:''' I could.

'''DAN:''' You're in!

'''STRONG INTELLIGENT:''' Yay!

'''JCM:''' But-

'''DAN:''' Come on, we've got some settling to do.

'''JCM:''' But-

''{The Good Deal Band and Strong Intelligent walk out of the auditorium.}''

'''JCM:''' But... yay is my thing.

''{Cut to JCM's garage. JCM is building a drum.}''

'''JCM:''' Man, if I'm going to be in Good Deal Dan's band, I'll need a drum!

''{JCM paints "JCM" on the drum and walks to the front lawn. He picks up two normal sticks from the ground.}''

'''JCM:''' I'm sure this will work!

''{JCM waves the sticks in the air. He does it so quickly that one flies out of his hand and a shriek of pain is heard offscreen.}''

'''JCM:''' Eh, I can replace it.

''{Cut to the auditorium. JCM runs next to Dan behind the stage as he gets ready for his next performance.}''

'''JCM:''' Hey, Dan, I have great news!

'''DAN:''' You're finally going to leave me alone?

'''JCM:''' No! I've gotten a new drum!

''{JCM takes the drum out of his pocket. Dan looks at it shocked.}''

'''DAN:'''How did you fit that in your pocket?

'''JCM:''' Why shouldn't I?

'''DAN:''' Uh, OK, whatever. I already told you that you can't be in my band.

'''JCM:''' Huh?

'''DAN:''' I already told you that you can't be in my band.

'''JCM:''' What?

'''DAN:''' ''{louder}'' I already told you that you can't be in my band!

'''JCM:''' Sorry, I can't hear you. I couldn't fit the drumsticks in my pocket, so I put them in my ears.

''{JCM sticks his hands in his "ears" and takes the sticks out. Dan looks even more shocked than before.}''

'''DAN:''' You have ears?

'''JCM:''' Yeah. So what was it you wanted to tell me?

'''DAN:''' Well-

'''STUDENT:''' ''{offscreen}'' JCM has a drum!

''{Cut to the other side of the curtain. The Good Deal Band members stick their heads out of the curtain as the students run out of the auditorium.}''

'''DAN:''' No! You've cleared the room!

'''STRONG INTELLIGENT:''' ''{sad}'' Now I'll never be the rock star.

'''JCM:''' Does this mean we're not going to the finals?

''{They turn back to JCM.}''

'''DAN:''' Finals? What are you talking about?

'''JCM:''' Strong Intelligent is part of another band, right?

''{Dan, Pete, and Alfonzo look at each other and then back at JCM.}''

'''DAN:''' Um, I think you're confused. Even more confused than usual.

'''JCM:''' Huh?

'''DAN:''' Strong Intelligent is our drummer.

'''JCM:''' Oh, I see! You want another drum for twice the effect. I get it.

'''DAN:''' No, JCM, you were never accepted.

'''JCM:''' Of course I was!

'''DAN:''' No, you weren't. I'm pretty sure I'd know whether or not I approved you as an addition to the band.

'''JCM:''' But I recruited a bunch of competitors and everything.

'''DAN:''' Wait, you what?

''{Cut to the other side of the curtain. Bands including the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, and the Jacksons walk into the auditorium, followed by a long string of students.}''

''{Cut back to backstage.}''

'''DAN:''' JCM, are you insane? How are we going to do a battle of the bands?

'''JCM:''' I set it up minutes ago. See?

''{The Good Deal Band members look out the curtain again. The auditorium is now full of chairs, balloons and a large banner saying "Battle of the Bands" is above them.}''

'''DAN:''' My gosh!

''{A spotlight on the side of the stage shines on them. }''

'''DAN:''' ''{smiles}'' Guys, we have some rocking to do.

'''JCM:''' Yay!

'''DAN:''' JCM, listen, your ignorance has helped us for once, but putting you back out there would be suicide.

'''JCM:''' I'm pretty sure suicide is a voluntary thing.

'''DAN:''' Exactly, which is why I'm giving to the opportunity to volunteer to give out our brochures during the performance.

'''JCM:''' Why, I'd love to!

'''DAN:''' Great! Now, lets go!

''{The band walks through the curtain to enthusiasm and JCM goes the other way.}''

'''JCM:''' Man, being in a band sure has it's perks!

''{The End}''

JCMovies/3 - Revision history

JCM: /* Movie */